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Bottomless pit supervisor

    The ‘Bottomless pit supervisor’ came from an AI written 4chan story where a guy working as a bottomless pit supervisor one day discovers that the pit isn’t bottomless.

    >be me
    
    >bottomless pit supervisor
    
    >in charge of making sure the bottomless pit is, in fact, bottomless
    
    >occasionally have to go down there and check if the bottomless pit is still bottomless
    
    >one day I go down there and the bottomless pit is no longer bottomless
    
    >the bottom of the bottomless pit is now just a regular pit
    
    >distress.jpg
    
    >ask my boss what to do
    
    >he says "just make it bottomless again"
    
    > I say "how"
    
    >he says "I don't know, you're the supervisor"
    
    >rage.jpg
    
    >quit my job
    
    >become a regular pit supervisor
    
    >first day on the job, go to the new hole
    
    >its bottomless

    There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again!

      Origin

      ‘There he is. There he goes again.’ copypasta originated from 4chan all the way back in 2014 when a user was replying to an unfunny meme.

      There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn’t he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.
      
      I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Banana thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the captcha. Maybe you’re such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The “epic” Banana guy, isn’t it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it’s ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that’s right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Bananafag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even try to talk with you because all you say is “I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS PICTURE.” You’ve become a parody of your own self. And that’s all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he’s done a million times now. And that’s all you’ll ever be.

      Pineapple greentext

        4chan story on pineapple and Shitgut
        >Be me
        >Be 16
        >New school, introduced to class
        >Meet guy who is an asshole, let's call him Shitgut >Shitgut tries to start bullying me
        >Be alpha and resist
        >Don't make many friends, don't need them
        >Notice Shitgut bullies other kids
        >Decide to fuck him up
        >Figure where his locker is
        >Wait until school is over, follow him home from a safe distance, unseen >Mark down where he lives, GTFO
        >Find out he does hockey, figure out where his ice rink is, and what time he trains >Spend six months practically stalking that fuck, making sure I don't get caught
        >Map out where he is at any time, at all times
        >Then proceed to phase two, buy a pineapple
        >On a day I get off school earlier than he does, bike to his house and leave the pineapple at the door >His parents ain't home for hours, seen by nobody
        >He tells people about the pineapple tomorrow, nobody cares
        >Two weeks later, sneak a pineapple at the ice rink, in the men's dressing room
        >People think he's making it up
        >Start buying a pineapple on a regular basis, always have it ready when opportunity strikes
        >Hallway empty, pick his locker and leave a pineapple
        >His motorbike is unwatched, leave a pineapple
        >He doesn't mention the pineapples to anyone anymore
        >Figure out where they keep his home's spare key
        >Skip school, sneak into his home while his parents work
        >Leave a pineapple on his bed
        >Hear he's failing classes
        >His parents put up a security camera, I figure the blind spot and dodge that shit >Send him a fucking pineapple for christmas through the mail from a fake address >He doesn't show up to school every day anymore
        >Don't even think about why I do it anymore, it's just for shits and giggles now >Bombard that fuck with random pineapples every few weeks for two fucking years >School year ends, finish school
        >Go to college like a boss
        >Come back home for the holidays
        >Hear someone from my old school had had a panic attack at the grocery store >It's Shitgut.
        >Someone had left a fucking pineapple on the beer shelf

        Anon goes to college with a gaming laptop

          First day of college with gaming laptop
          >first day of college
          >walk into Computer Science 101 class
          >look around, normie MacBooks and pleb laptops abound
          >reach into backpack
          >summon up all my strength
          >powerlift my gaming laptop onto the desk
          >catch my breathe for a moment
          >reach into my backpack again
          >once again summon my strength
          >pull out the charging cable (the laptop only lasts 5 minutes without a charge)
          >drop it onto the desk, a loud THUMP echoes throughout the classroom and into the hallways >the classroom is now staring in awe of the monster I've just unleashed
          >plug the cable in, sparks fly as though Zeus himself blessed the connection
          >classmates look on in horror as I open the laptop >as I hover my finger towards the power button, some students begin trying to escape the room >but there is no escape
          >press the power button
          >RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
          RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

          Related to the ‘I hate gaming laptop‘ pasta

          This is the pinnacle of German humour and it’s pathetic

            4chan "This is the pinnacle of German humour" origin
            This is the pinnacle of German humour and it's pathetic. I can imagine him snorting to himself as he typed this, as if this was an absolute spirit bomb of a comment, and then reading it out loud in his disgusting language "schlieben fleeb hach jurgeflachtung" before falling into a coughing fit from the laughter. I almost pity him.

            Anon on IQ scores

              Original 4chan thread on how IQ relates to abstract cognitive functions as hypothetical thinking, recursion, cognitive empathy, sequencing, mapping
              >I did IQ research as a grad student, and it involved a lot of this stuff. Did you know that most people (95%+) with less than 90 IQ can't understand conditional hypotheticals?
              >For example:
              >How would you have felt yesterday evening if you hadn't eaten breakfast or lunch?
              >What do you mean? I did eat breakfast and lunch.
              >Yes, but if you had not, how would you have felt?
              >Why are you saying that I didn't eat breakfast? I just told you that I did.
              >Imagine that you hadn't eaten it, though. How would you have felt?
              >I don't understand the question.
              >It's really fascinating. We did research on convicts in San Quentin. They're absolute fucking retards, at least 50% illiterate.
              >Other interesting phenomenon around IQ involves recursion.
              >For example:
              >Write a story with two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue. >Most literate people can manage this, especially once you give them an example.
              >Write a story with two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue.
              >In this story, one of the characters must be describing a story with at least two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue.
              >If you have less than 90 IQ, this second exercise is basically completely impossible.
              >Add a third level ('frame') to the story, and even IQ 100's start to get mixed up with the names and who's talking. >Turns out Scheherazade was an IQ test!
              >Time is practically impossible to understand for sub 80's. They exist only in the present, can barely reflect on the past and can't plan for the future at all.
              >Sub 90's struggle with anachronism too. For example, I remember the 80-85's stumbling on logic problems that involved common sense anachronism stuff.
              >For instance:
              >Why do you think that military strategists in WWII didn't use laptop computers to help develop their strategies? >I guess they didn't want to get hacked by Nazis?
              >Admittedly you could argue that this is a history knowledge question, not quite a logic sequencing question, but you get the idea.
              >Sequencing is super hard for them to track, but most 100+ have no problem with it, although I imagine that a movie like Memento strains them a little.
              >Recursion was definitely the killer, though.
              >Recursive thinking and recursive knowledge seems genuinely hard for people of even average intelligence (although at San Quentin there weren't too many of those!)
              >It's the main reason why so many people with sub-90 IQ are sociopathic or psychopathic. They don't have the mental computing power to model other people's thoughts and feelings. I've seen it over and over with convicts. >How do you think that man felt when you beat him?
              >Dunno.
              >How do you think that boy's mother felt when she heard that her son was dead?
              >Dunno.
              >It comes across as psychopathic, but these people literally don't have the brainpower to build even a crude model of someone else's mind, let alone populate it with events that are in the past.
              >I forgot to mention another important part of abstract reasoning, which is 'mapping'. Basically, expressing one thing in terms of another.
              >For example:
              >Imagine a picture of an arrow, colored in a gradient from yellow to green, following the direction of the arrow. >Imagine a one-way residential street, with ascending house numbers, with the lowest number being at the entrance of the street and the highest number being at the exit.
              >If you mapped the arrow onto the street, what color would house number 1 be?
              >This question really isn't tricky for most 100+s. It has some minor ambiguities, but anyone of normal intelligence can do the 'mapping': that is, the expression of one thing in terms of another.
              >However, for sub-90's, this stuff is REALLY difficult. They struggle terribly with it. Sub 80's just can't do it at all. >Anything under 90 will routinely make errors with even commonplace mapping (like subway maps, time schedules, etc.) Sub 85s start to get into the territory where they can't learn to read, as symbolic mapping of phonemes (or even morphemes) even with constant drilling, is just too tricky.
              >Math is another area I could get into, but the long and the short of it is that it's heavily decided by IQ. That's a bit tautological, since it's a principal IQ measurement, but you know what I mean.
              >As for the criminal narcissists etc: I honestly don't know. However, sufficiently high IQ autists can emulate theory of mind, and do. If you're smart enough, you can build a little simulator in your brain. You also need to be smart enough to appreciate the utility of it.
              >I suspect that any autist or narcissist over 120 can do this stuff regularly without getting tired, but it's like playing a strenuous game of chess for them. They really don't have the 'hardware' for empathy. That's it.
              >reeeee formatting
              fuck you I already reformatted it for normie consumption and have been disseminating it, not retranslating to autist.