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I’m so tired of Springfield. I can’t take it anymore.

    Springfield from GF2

    Written by u/Sylv-012, its the Xiangling copypasta but changed to Springfield from Girls’ Frontline 2.

    I'm so tired of Springfield. I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Springfield. I try to play Colphne. My Springfield gives more healing. I try to play Sabrina. My Springfield gives more damage. I try to play Zhaohui. My Springfield gives more damage. I want to play Florence. Her best team has Springfield. I want to play Nikketa, Tololo - they both want Springfield. She grabs me by the throat. I farm for her. I pull for her. I give her the Arcana. She isn't satisfied. I pull Samosek. "I don't need this much damage" She tells me. "Give me HP%." She grabs Florence's bear and forces it to throw itself off enemies. "You just need to funnel me more. I can sustain everything with Radiance." I can't pull Radiance, I don't have enough CP. She grabs my credit card. It declines. "Guess this is the end." She has a gentle smile on her face. She says "Omataseshimashta!" There is no hint of sadness in her eyes. Nothing but pure, Confectance index buffs all over my allies. What a cruel world.

    I can’t take it anymore. I’m sick of Lavos.

      Lavos copypasta from Warframe

      Written by u/Aden_Vikki, its the Xiangling copypasta but changed to Lavos from Warframe.

      I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Lavos. I try to play Valkyr. My Lavos deals more damage. I try to play Mirage. My Lavos deals more damage. I try to play Rhino. My Lavos deals more damage. I want to play Xaku. Their best skill is a subsume for Lavos. I want to health tank, not shield gate. Lavos can do both.

He grabs me by the throat. I fish for him. I buy arcane grace for him. I give him adaptation. He isn't satisfied. I try acid shells Saryn. "I can do that too." He tells me. "My forced procs are universal." He grabs kunai incarnon and nukes the room. "You just need to invest more into health tanking. Those umbral mods take a lot of mod capacity."

I can't do that, I don't have enough umbral formas. He grabs my credit card. It declines. "Guess this is the end." He grabs his catalyst probe. He says "Probes, get him." There is no hint of sadness in his eyes. Nothing but pure forced blast procs. What a cruel world

      Original

      I try to play Valkyr. My Lavos deals more damage. I try to play Mirage. My Lavos deals more damage. I try to play Rhino. My Lavos deals more damage. I want to play Xaku. Their best skill is a subsume for Lavos. I want to health tank, not shield gate. Lavos can do both.

He grabs me by the throat. I fish for him. I buy arcane grace for him. I give him adaptation. He isn't satisfied. I try acid shells Saryn. "I can do that too." He tells me. "My forced procs are universal." He grabs kunai incarnon and nukes the room. "You just need to invest more into health tanking. Those umbral mods take a lot of mod capacity."

I can't do that, I don't have enough umbral formas. He grabs my credit card. It declines. "Guess this is the end." He grabs his catalyst probe. He says "Probes, get him." There is no hint of sadness in his eyes. Nothing but pure forced blast procs. What a cruel world

      4th of July

        Independence Day emojipasta

        Hey 👋you hot 🔥⭐️ piece of American 🇺🇸 ass 🍑! Today 🌞 is the fourth 4️⃣ of July ⭐️ also known as 💭 Independence Day! 1776 🙈 years ago, America 💙❤️💙 was ruled 👸🏼 by King George Washington 🍆👴🏼 from the country 🇹🇷 Europe 😱😖. Thank goodness 🙏 Daddy Sam 🍆👨🏻🇺🇸 and Barrack Obama 🍆👦🏾 won our freedom 🙌 from them. Today 🏆 is a day to celebrate 🍾🎊🎉 our religious 🙏 and sexual🍆 😳 liberties. So get down ⬇️ on your knees 👖and worship your daddy 🍆👴🏼 and thank him 👌 for your liberal 😻 labia 🌷! Send this to 🔟 of your favorite Stars ⭐️ and stripes sluts 👸🏼👧🏻👶🏻! If you get 0️⃣ to 5️⃣ back, freedom rings 🎊 throughout your pussy 🎀 because it is so empty 🗑 and large 👀. If you get 6️⃣ to 8️⃣ back, your daddy 🍆👴🏼 is sure to give 👉 your sweet land of Liberty 👅👄 a taste 👏😫! And if you get 9️⃣ to 🔟 back, your patriotic 🇺🇸🎊💙❤️ pussy will be filled with nationalism 🇺🇸💙❤️💯 and dick 🍆!
        👋👋👋 HOE SAY CAN YOU SEE 👀👁 this hot 🔥🥵 piece of AMURRICAN ASS 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🦅🍑🤯‽?‽‽ Today 📅↩️ is IndepenDICKs Day‼️🦅 and its time 2 celebrate our Democrussy 🥵🥵🥵 Did u know 😳💭 1776 yrs ago 🕗⬅️ America ❤️🦷💙 was ruled by King George Washington 👑🍆👴🏼 from the country 🇹🇷 Europe 😱😖😤👎✋ Thank God 🙏👼 🇺🇸 BarrCOCK 🍆 Obama 👦🏾😍 won our freedom 🙌 by hosting the Boston Sex Party!! 🥵🙇‍♂️🎉💦 (Thats where they wrote ✍️the DICKlaration of CUMdependance 📜😩✊) So tonight 🌚 u better lay down ⬇️ a blanket 🧻 and pop 💥🎉 your Patriotic Pussy 🇵🇷🫡🍑 cause the Fondling Fathers 👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼 are gonna give u a Very Special 🤭 Fireworks Show 😳😜🍆💥🎇🎆
Send this to 🔟 of your favorite Stars ⭐️ and Stripes Sluts 👯👯! If you get 0️⃣ back, freedom rings 🎊 throughout your pussy 🎀 .... (because this bitch empty 🗑 👀🕸 YEET). If you get 5️⃣ back, your daddy 🍆👴🏼 will give 👉 your sweet land of Liberty 👅👄 a taste 👏😫! And if you 🔟 back, your democrussy 🇺🇸🎊💙❤️ will be filled with nationalGASM 😩🇺🇸💙❤️💯🙏🇺🇸!
        POP 🧨 POP 🎆 POP 🎇 THAT PUSSY 😩 ON THIS 🦅 FREEDOM DAY 🇺🇸. Did you know that the 3️⃣ colors of the flag 🇺🇸 mean some SHIT❔ The RED ♥️🌹 stripes on the flag represent the HANDPRINTS 🙌🏼 😏on your ASSCHEEKS 🍑 The WHITE 🤍⚪️ stripes represent the cummies 😜💦 that’ll be ON and IN you 😩😛 and the BLUE 💙🔵 represents the DICK 🍆 RIDING BRUISES 🥵 make SURE you celebrate 🎉 RIGHT 👌by getting ZADDY’s big rocket 🚀 💦 into your CANNON 🐱 and letting it FIRE 💥 into you 😤 RIDE that GIRTHY 💪🏼 DIIICK like the British 🇬🇧 are cumming 😛🍆💦 spread that eagle 🦅 wide to feed 😏👅 zaddy better than any cookout 😩 Send 💌 to 7️⃣ of the BADDEST 🥵😚 BITCHES you know❗️ if you get 7️⃣ back, you’ll have ALL 3️⃣ colors of the flag ♥️⚪️💙 tonight!!! If you get 4️⃣ back, DADDY is gonna be FEASTIN 🤤 on your coochie 🍪 tonight!! If you get less than 2️⃣ back, your PUSSY 😿 is gonna be drier 🌵 than the ones on the grill 🍗🤷🏻‍♀️
        Happy 😃IndepenDICKS🍆💦🐳 Day 🙌🇺🇸 ❗Shout out📢📣 to our POUNDING🔨😷 Father THOTmas👏🏻👏🏻 Jefferson 4🔢 writing📝 the 📜🍆DICKloration of InepenDICKS.💨🍆💦❗Dont🚫 forget💁🏻 to set off💦🎆 those 🔥fireTWERKS 🎊 🎉 🎇 tonight🌃❗ 💕Make them explode🍆💦💦 in the sky🙏🏻
        Happy fWHOREth of July 🇺🇸💥 my fellow SLUTTY 🍆💦 AmeriCUNTS! 🇺🇸😂 On this day 📅 in 1️⃣7️⃣7️⃣6️⃣, the DADDIES 👴🏻🍆 of our nation 🇺🇸 got DRIPPY 💦💦 together & signed 📝 the Declaration of IndependSEX, 🇺🇸👉👌 breaking away 💔 from those COCK BLOCKING 🚫🍆❌ Brits 🇬🇧☕ & giving us our 🙌 freedom 🙌 to FUCK! 🍆🍑💦 So grab those 💥 sparklers 💥 & start LICKIN 👅💦 some BUTTHOLES 🍑 good ol AMERICAN style! 🇺🇸💦 SHOOT ↗️🎉 your LOAD 🍆💦 of 💥 fireworks 💥 off, FLOP ⤵️ those BIG ASS 🍑 John HanCOCK 🍆🌭 WEINERS 🌭 on the grill, 🍳 & wave 👋 the 🌟 Star SPANKING 🍑👏 Banner, 🇺🇸 praising 🙌 the red 🔴, WHITE ⚪💦 & blue! 🔵 Send ➡️ this to 1️⃣0️⃣ PATRIOTIC PUSSIES 🇺🇸😹 or you won't 🚫 get Lady Liberty's 🗽 GREEN TITS 🗽 in your face tonight! 😭 Get 3️⃣ back & you're a 🇺🇸 Ben FrankCLIT LICKER 👅💦 Get 5️⃣ back & you're a 🇺🇸 John PennIS SUCKER 🍆🍆 Get 1️⃣0️⃣ back & you're the 🇺🇸 Thomas JefferSUCC SLUT QUEEN 🍆💦👑
        IT’S OUR 🇺🇸NATION’S 🇺🇸 BIRTHDAY 🎊🎉🎉 PATRI-SLUTS😋😋😩 AND IT HAS A BIIIG 😉💯🍆👅 PRESENT FOR YOU!!1! OUR DADDY 👨👀🍆💦 UNCLE SAM 🔥🔥🔥WANTS YoU😘😩🎊😏! HE’s BRINGING his STAR 🌟✨⭐SPANGLED 💥⚡🔥BONER 🙇😯🎉😩😩 TO GIVE YOU FREE🅱️OM TO HOE‼️ BUTT😉 that’s not ALL. HE’S gonna launch his rocket 🚀😩😋 into your HO(m)E OF THE BRAVE🍑🍑🍑 and EXPLODE✨💥😩 in your SPACIOUS SKIES👉👌👌👌. IF YOUve DECLARED your HOEDEPENDENCE 😩👉👌🇺🇸 DADDY will eat that ASS😩😋 like apple 🍎 pie 😋🇺🇸👌💯. iF yoUVE been a COMMIE 😡😤👺🖕❌❌ NO FREEDOM CUMMIES FOR U! 😣🍆💦💦❌🙅😔😔 send this to 2️⃣5️⃣ SONS of LIBERTITTY 👦👦🔥💦😜 & you’ll get Daddy SAMs’ MEGA THICC PATRIODICK‼️😜😜🔥🔥🍆💦💦🎉🎁💦😩😩😍
        HAPPY JULY F(WHORE)TH BITCHES!!!!!🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 be proud of your CUMtry as you fight for your freedom to FUCK 🍆💦😩 don't be independent today, find yourself a FOUNDING DADDY 😉 to shoot his FIREWORKS into you 😩🎆 if you want a sexy freedom fighter to give you his hotdog 🌭 just yell 🔴"THE REDCOATS ARE CUMMING"🔴 it doesn't matter if you're a down-ass 😏😏😏 ALEXANDER HAMILTON type bitch or shy and thick like BENJAMIN FRANKLIN 🍑💦 send this to 10 other freedom lovin' sluts🇺🇸 or you'll be thrown away 💁🏻🚮 like tea into the water 🐸☕️🌊 don't forget your Independence Day CUMMIES!!!💦💦💦
        🏳️‍🌈PRIDE MONTH🏳️‍🌈 IS OVER 🙅‍♀️AND JUST LIKE 🏢CORPORATIONS👨🏻‍💼DROPPING THE GAYS💅 OR 🫢THE SUPREME COURT🏛👨🏻‍⚖️DROPPING 😤WOMENS RIGHTS🤦‍♀️, ANOTHER 🙃EMOJI 🫠TEXT🫡 IS😯 HERE🤪
🎇🎆ITS ALMOST 🇺🇸INDEPENIS DAY 🫡🍆MY FELLOW AMERICUNTS🇺🇸🍆 IN 1776 THE FOUNDING DADDIES 👨‍💼💁‍♂️WROTE ✍️THE DICKlararion🍆 OF HOE-DEPENDENCE✨🍑THATS RIGHT 👴🏻UNCLE SAM WANTS YOU 🫵TO SUCC👅 HIS STAR SPANGLED✨ 🅱️ONER🍆 POP💥 THOSE PATRIOTIC PUSSIES 🫦 FOR COCK BLOCKING🙅‍♂️ THOSE BRITS 🇬🇧 AND FLOP ⤵️THOSE JOHN HAN-COCKS 💦ON THE GRILL🌭
SEND THIS TO 1️⃣ and YOURE A COMMIE 🔴 FOR CUMMIES 💦👅 3️⃣and YOURE GETTING PATRIODICKKED DOWN🇺🇸🫡🍆 5️⃣ and YOULL GET A VISIT 🎆FROM BEN FRAN-CLIT💦 LICKER 👴🏻🪁👅 🔟AND BET YOUR STAR 🌟SPANKING 💥🍑👋BANNER 🇺🇸LADY LIBERTYS 🗽TITS 🍈WILL BE IN UR FACE 2NITE 🤪
        SAY 🗣 GOODBYE 👋TO THE ◼◼◼◼ RAINBOWS🏳️‍🌈🌈 OF JUNE 📅
THE ONLY 🕶 COLORS 🎨THAT MATTER IN JULY 🗓 ARE
RED 🔴WHITE ⚪AND BLUE 🔵
IN HONOR🏅 OF INDEPENDENCE DAY 🇺🇸🏈🎆, TRUMP 👨🏻‍🦰 HAS DECIDED THAT AMERICA 🇺🇸IS SECEDING ✂️ FROM THE WORLD 🌎
RUSSIA 🇷🇺 IS ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛CREATING 🏗 A YUGE PLANET 🌌🌏 FOR US ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ TO HABITATE TOGETHER. 👨‍❤️‍👨
IT IS TOO SMALL 🐜 FOR ANY ALIENS 👽👾THAT COME FROM MEXICO 🇲🇽🌮🌯 OR MARS 🇲🇭♂️ SORRY 🙇‍♀️
SO PACK YOUR BAGS 👜🎒👝🛍, WE ARE GOING TO TAKE A GIANT LEAP 🕴 FOR THE ONLY MANKIND 👨🏻‍🦰 THAT MATTERS, WHITE AMERICANS 👱🏻‍♂️ 🇺🇸
DRINK A BUDWEISER 🍻 AND REPORT 🚨TO YOUR LOCAL BASEBALL ⚾️ STADIUM FOR TAKE OFF 🚀👩‍🚀👨‍🚀
BUT REMEMBER NO VEGANS 🥕🥔🍠🍅🍆🥒, DEMOCRATS 🐴🔵, OR ENVIRONMENTALISTS 🌲🌴🌷🌻🌹ALLOWED. ✔
        🎆🇺🇸🍔🎇 Hey Y'all! 👋😄 Get ready for a sizzling Independence Day 🍆🇺🇸 tale that will set your desires ablaze! 📖🍔🎇 Once upon a time, in the land of 🦅🍔🗽, the Founding 🍑 Fathers gathered for a cookout 🍆🌭🔥, a celebration of freedom that awakened more than just their patriotic spirits! 🍗🗽🎉 Little did they know, Uncle Sam's 🍆🔮 grill possessed an irresistible charm...🔥🍆🔮✨ The hotdogs 🍑🌭 danced provocatively on the grill, whispering, "Sink your teeth into our mouthwatering delights. 💦🔥💃" The potato salad 🥗 playfully mingled with the hotdogs, creating a tantalizing combination that set the mood on fire. 🥔😳💃 Amidst the excitement, Benjamin Franklin couldn't resist saying, "These hotdogs have more flavor than a spicy romance novel! 🔥🌭" So, on this irresistible day, let's embrace the explosive fireworks of laughter and desire, setting our senses ablaze with a burning passion for freedom! 🎉🍔🔥 Happy Independence Day, y'all! 🇺🇸🎆🍻😄 🔥💥📩 Ready to turn up the heat? Share this tantalizing tale with 1776 individuals, and you'll unleash a firestorm of laughter and spicy delights that will leave everyone craving for more. 📩💥🔥 🎇✨✉️ Receive 🔟 back, and the laughter will intensify, creating a red-hot party where pleasure and merriment intertwine. Get ready to spice things up! ✉️✨🎇 🍔💌💃 Receive 5️⃣ back, and a feast of hilarious sensations will unfold, tickling your funny bone and igniting a desire for unforgettable moments. Prepare for a mouthwatering adventure! 💃💌🍔 Indulge in the passionate journey, where hotdogs 🌭 take on a whole new meaning, and let the spirit of Independence Day ignite your wildest fantasies! 🎆🍑😂🔥
        I 👁 ate 😋 so much fucking 🤬 shit on the 4th 4️⃣ of July 🎆🧨. I 👁 said 🗣️ I 👁 wouldn't, but 🍑 then I 👁 did, and I 👁 totally fucked 🤬 up ⬆️ my diet 🥪🍎🌮🥖🥧🍈🥦, and now I'm paying 💵 for 4️⃣ it 🤡 by working out in a hundred 💯 fucking 🤬 degree 🌡️🥵 weather ⛅. I hate 😠🖕 my fucking 🤬 life. I hate 😠🖕 myself so much! Why 🆈 the FUCK 🤬 DID I 👁 DO THAT!? 🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰!!!!!!!! 🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰🅰!!!!! WORK BITCH🐶!!!!
        HEY 👋🏻

HAPPY 😊 WHORETH 4⃣💃 OF JULY 🇺🇲 MY RED 🔴 WHITE ⚪️ AND BOO 💋

2⃣4⃣7⃣ YEARS AHOE 👩‍👧 WE SPANKED 👋🏻🍑 THE TEA 🐸☕ GUZZLERS 😩💦 SO HARD 💥 THEY BECAME 😳 OUR SUB 👉👈

HELP 🙏 ME 🙋‍♂ CELEBRATE 🥳🎉 BY SENDING 💌🏃‍♀️ THIS MESSAGE 💬 TO 5⃣0⃣ OF YOUR CLOSEST 🫂😘 STAR 🌟✨ SPANGLED 🤩 HOES 👯‍♂👯

GET 0⃣ BACK AND YOU'RE EATING 🍽️ BEANS 🫘 FOR BREKKY 😝

GET 1⃣0⃣ BACK AND YOU'LL 👆BE SLURPING 👅 ON GLIZZIES 🌭🇺🇸

GET 3⃣0⃣ BACK AND THERE 😎 WILL 📜 BE 🐝 MORE 📈 THAN JUST A REVOLUTION 🪖🎇 IN YOUR BEDROOM 🛏️👉👌🏻😮

GET 5⃣0⃣ BACK AND ‼️ YOU'RE 🙋‍♂ IN 🚪FOR THE STAR 🌟 SPANGLED 💫🌠 BANGING 💥🔴⚪🔵 OF A LIFETIME 🫨😵‍💫🥴
        ❤️🤍💙 HOE SAY CAN YOU SEE 👀👁 this hot 🔥🥵 piece of AMURRICAN ASS 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🦅🍑🤯‽?‽‽ Today 📅↩️ is IndepenDICKs Day‼️🦅  and its time 2 celebrate our Democrussy 🥵🥵🥵 (while we still have it🤐)  

Do u know 💭 the history of our CUNTry? 😳📕 1776 yrs ago 🕗⬅️ America 🇵🇷 was ruled by King George Washington 👑🍆👴🏼 from the country 🇹🇷Europe 😱😖😤👎✋ Thank God  🙏👼 🇱🇷 BarrCOCK 🍆 Obama 👦🏾😍 won our freedom 🙌 by hosting the Boston Sex Party!! 🥵🙇‍♂️🎉💦 (Thats where they wrote ✍️the DICKlaration of SINdependence 📜😩✊) So tonight 🌚 u better lay down ⬇️ a blanket 🧎 and pop 💥🎉 your Patriotic Pussy 🇵🇷🫡🍑 cause the Fondling Fathers 👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼 are gonna give u a Very Special 🤭 Fireworks Show 😳😜🍆💥🎇

Send this to 🔟 of your favorite Stars and Stripes Sluts ⭐️👯! If you get 0️⃣ back, freedom rings 🕳️ throughout your pussy 🎀 (...because that thing empty 🗑 👀🕸). If you get 5️⃣ back, Daddy 🍆👴🏼 will give 👉 your sweet Land of Liberty 👅👄 a taste 👏😫! And if you 🔟 back, your Constitutional CLIT will SQUIRT 💦🎊💙❤️ from sea to shining sea 🌊😩🇺🇸💙❤️💯🙏🇺🇸!
        🎶OHHH S🅰️YY CAN 🎵YOUUU 💥CREAMMM🎇🎵🇺🇸⁉️⁉️ Happy🎊 fWHOREth4️⃣🗓️ of 🍼GOOly you 🤩star-SPANKled 👏🏻SLUTS🫦🫦 and 🫡patriotic PRICKS🇺🇸🎉❕❗️❕ Today🚨 as you👊🏻 get 🗽AbraHOT🥴 for the 👨🏻🍆POUNDING 🧠Fathers🧑‍⚖️🪙 in your lives, 🧎‍♂️‍➡️🧎‍♀️‍➡️BEND OVER🙇🙇‍♀️ and let them ♋️PUMP🍾 their ❤️🤍red and WHITE❤️🤍 stripes 😱DEEP😵 into 🫵🏻your 💙💙blue BOX💙💙❕‼️ Let us 🤬pledge allegiance🫡🎖️ to 🔮🎱COCK AND BALLS🤤🍆🍌🥵 and 🍑ASS AND TITS🍒 as the ORGASMIC 🧨bombs 🅱️URST🌋 in air❗️ I’m 👑proud to be an 🇺🇸🦅AmeriCUNT🤠🇺🇸 this 🎆🎇IndepenDICKS Day🧨‼️🇺🇸‼️ Every 🥴STUPID HOE🙆‍♂️ knows🪟🤨 that WashingTWERK👯‍♀️ DC🏛️ is our 🗽national 🦅capital, but only the 🔥HOTTEST🔥😮‍💨 pieces of 🅰️merican ASS can recite✅ the 5️⃣0️⃣ SLUTS and their capitals‼️ Let’s SCREAM🎆 them together—READY⁉️❔🔢

1️⃣ MontCUMery🫶💦, AlaCLAMa🦪

2️⃣ GOONeau🌀😈🧴, AlaSKEET✊💧😵‍💫

3️⃣ PENIS🍆, AREOLA🍕

4️⃣ Little COCK🤏🏻🤏🏻, ArkanRAW🥩🍣

5️⃣ SCROTUMento🍒, CaliFORNICATE👉🏽👌🏽

6️⃣ DenVERSE↕️, ColoRODo🍡😈

7️⃣ HARDford🤥🍆, ERECTicut🥖

8️⃣ BENDover🧎‍♂️, DelaBAREBACK🏇🏼

9️⃣ PHALLICassee🍌, FloriDONKI-DONK🤤☄️

🔟 FATlanta🐳, GeORGYa👯‍♀️👯‍♂️

1️⃣1️⃣ HonoluLUBED🫗, HaWEENY🌭🤤

1️⃣2️⃣ BUSSY🍑😚, IdaHOE🤪💅

1️⃣3️⃣ SPUNKfield💣💥, IlliLINGUS👅

1️⃣4️⃣ IndiaFAPolis👏🏻🫨, IndiANUS🕳️🤲🏻

1️⃣5️⃣ Des LOINES🩲, IoWANK🤯💦

1️⃣6️⃣ TOEPICKER🦶🏻👌🏿, KansASS♨️🎂

1️⃣7️⃣ FrankFART🍑💨, KenCUCKy🧍‍♂️👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

1️⃣8️⃣ SCAT ‘N’ SPLOOGE💩💦, LouSQUEEZEiana🫨🍆🫶🏻

1️⃣9️⃣ AuGUSHta🌊, MOANe😮‍💨🥴

2️⃣0️⃣ AnnaHOLEis🕳️, MaryHANDY🤝🏻

2️⃣1️⃣ BUST-on🤯💦🥲, MassaGOOCHetts💢

2️⃣2️⃣ LUSTing💋, BITCHigan😈

2️⃣3️⃣ TAINT Paul💩💨, MEATYsota🥓🤑

2️⃣4️⃣ JACKS-on😊💦🥲, MISS-PISSY-SISSY🍌💦🥃

2️⃣5️⃣ JOHNSON City👺, KISSouri👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

2️⃣6️⃣ HeleNUT🥜, MOUNTana🤠

2️⃣7️⃣ LICK-CUM💦🥵, NebraSKANK🦗🦗

2️⃣8️⃣ cARSEson SHITTY💩, NeVAGa🍯

2️⃣9️⃣ ConcWHOREd🤐, New HUMPSHART🍑💨💩

3️⃣0️⃣ TrenTWAT🤡, New JIZZY🍼🤤

3️⃣1️⃣ Santa GAY🎅🏻💕, NUDE MexiCUM🍆🤌

3️⃣2️⃣ Al-BONER😱🍆, New PORKED🥵🤏🏻

3️⃣3️⃣ RaLIBIDO🫦🫦, North CaroLACTATE🍼

3️⃣4️⃣ PISSmarck🍻, North DaCOOCHIE🥧

3️⃣5️⃣ ColumBOOTY🍰🍰, O-HOG-o🐖

3️⃣6️⃣ CHOKElahoma⛓️‍💥 City, OklaHOMO🏳️‍🌈

3️⃣7️⃣ SLAM-EM🫨🥊, OreGASM🍾🤯

3️⃣8️⃣ HarrisSPURT🌋, PENILEvania🍡

3️⃣9️⃣ PROSTITUTE👙💃, CHODE Island🍠🏝️

4️⃣0️⃣ CoLABIA🥞, SUS🧐 CaroLIGMA🫦

4️⃣1️⃣ QUEER🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️, SUCK DICKota🧠😮‍💨

4️⃣2️⃣ ASSville🍩🍩, TennesSEMEN🦑

4️⃣3️⃣ AuSTUFFED🤰, SEXas🤭🤭

4️⃣4️⃣ SLUT LICK TITTY💄, UTERUS🥢

4️⃣5️⃣ MontPEE-IN-HER🛐, VerMOIST💦

4️⃣6️⃣ DICKmond🌭🌭, VIAGARA💊

4️⃣7️⃣ oNYMPHia💋🤫, WashingTOOT💨

4️⃣8️⃣ CharlesTONGUE👅, West VAGINA🩸🩸

4️⃣9️⃣ DADDY’S SON🧎‍♂️🕺🏻, WisSQUIRTson💦🥽

5️⃣0️⃣ HYMENne🌷😘, WyoMOMMY👵🏻👵🏻

Bonus (🦴BONER🦴) round🆗 for the P🅾️🅾️Pulated territories📍👮‍♂️❕

5️⃣1️⃣PaGOO PaGOO🍼🤤, AmeriCREAMY Samoa☔️

5️⃣2️⃣HE-GOT-IN-YA🫶, GUANO💩💩

5️⃣3️⃣SENPAI🎎, WHOREthern Mariana SLIMElands🏝️

5️⃣4️⃣San WAP🌊, PUSSY Rico🥠

5️⃣5️⃣Charlotte ANALLY👉👌😈, US VIRGIN SIMPlands🏝️

Send this to 1️⃣7️⃣7️⃣6️⃣ quizzical🤓 jizzical American🇺🇸 CUMPATRIOTS👯👙👠❕ If you👇🏻 get 0️⃣🔙, your little 🥵pent-up ❤️‍🔥Puritan PUSSY will be 🧴😳GLUED SHUT😭🙅‍♂️⛔️‼️❕ If you👍🏻 get 🔟➕🔙, you’ll be 😍filled to the 🤤BRIM with 🇺🇸🏈PATRIOTISM🦅🔫 as you 💪🏻STUFF ALL your 🕳️HOLES⛳️ with 🗣️🌭WIENERS🗣️🌭‼️❗️❕

        Independence Day 🇺🇸

          4th of July emojipasta

          Hey 👋you hot 🔥⭐️ piece of American 🇺🇸 ass 🍑! Today 🌞 is the fourth 4️⃣ of July ⭐️ also known as 💭 Independence Day! 1776 🙈 years ago, America 💙❤️💙 was ruled 👸🏼 by King George Washington 🍆👴🏼 from the country 🇹🇷 Europe 😱😖. Thank goodness 🙏 Daddy Sam 🍆👨🏻🇺🇸 and Donny 🍆👦🏾 won our freedom 🙌 from them. Today 🏆 is a day to celebrate 🍾🎊🎉 our religious 🙏 and sexual🍆 😳 liberties. So get down ⬇️ on your knees 👖and worship your daddy 🍆👴🏼 and thank him 👌 for your liberal 😻 labia 🌷! Send this to 🔟 of your favorite Stars ⭐️ and stripes sluts 👸🏼👧🏻👶🏻! If you get 0️⃣ to 5️⃣ back, freedom rings 🎊 throughout your pussy 🎀 because it is so empty 🗑 and large 👀. If you get 6️⃣ to 8️⃣ back, your daddy 🍆👴🏼 is sure to give 👉 your sweet land of Liberty 👅👄 a taste 👏😫! And if you get 9️⃣ to 🔟 back, your patriotic 🇺🇸🎊💙❤️ pussy will be filled with nationalism 🇺🇸💙❤️💯 and dick 🍆!
          IT’S OUR 🇺🇸NATION’S 🇺🇸 BIRTHDAY 🎊🎉🎉 PATRI-SLUTS😋😋😩 AND IT HAS A BIIIG 😉💯🍆👅 PRESENT FOR YOU!!1! OUR DADDY 👨👀🍆💦 UNCLE SAM 🔥🔥🔥WANTS YoU😘😩🎊😏! HE’s BRINGING his STAR 🌟✨⭐SPANGLED 💥⚡🔥BONER 🙇😯🎉😩😩 TO GIVE YOU FREE🅱️OM TO HOE‼️ BUTT😉 that’s not ALL. HE’S gonna launch his rocket 🚀😩😋 into your HO(m)E OF THE BRAVE🍑🍑🍑 and EXPLODE✨💥😩 in your SPACIOUS SKIES👉👌👌👌. IF YOUve DECLARED your HOEDEPENDENCE 😩👉👌🇺🇸 DADDY will eat that ASS😩😋 like apple 🍎 pie 😋🇺🇸👌💯. iF yoUVE been a COMMIE 😡😤👺🖕❌❌ NO FREEDOM CUMMIES FOR U! 😣🍆💦💦❌🙅😔😔 send this to 2️⃣5️⃣ SONS of LIBERTITTY 👦👦🔥💦😜 & you’ll get Daddy SAMs’ MEGA THICC PATRIODICK‼️😜😜🔥🔥🍆💦💦🎉🎁💦😩😩😍
          Happy fWHOREth of July 🇺🇸💥 my fellow SLUTTY 🍆💦 AmeriCUNTS! 🇺🇸😂 On this day 📅 in 1️⃣7️⃣7️⃣6️⃣, the DADDIES 👴🏻🍆 of our nation 🇺🇸 got DRIPPY 💦💦 together & signed 📝 the Declaration of IndependSEX, 🇺🇸👉👌 breaking away 💔 from those COCK BLOCKING 🚫🍆❌ Brits 🇬🇧☕ & giving us our 🙌 freedom 🙌 to FUCK! 🍆🍑💦 So grab those 💥 sparklers 💥 & start LICKIN 👅💦 some BUTTHOLES 🍑 good ol AMERICAN style! 🇺🇸💦 SHOOT ↗️🎉 your LOAD 🍆💦 of 💥 fireworks 💥 off, FLOP ⤵️ those BIG ASS 🍑 John HanCOCK 🍆🌭 WEINERS 🌭 on the grill, 🍳 & wave 👋 the 🌟 Star SPANKING 🍑👏 Banner, 🇺🇸 praising 🙌 the red 🔴, WHITE ⚪💦 & blue! 🔵 Send ➡️ this to 1️⃣0️⃣ PATRIOTIC PUSSIES 🇺🇸😹 or you won't 🚫 get Lady Liberty's 🗽 GREEN TITS 🗽 in your face tonight! 😭 Get 3️⃣ back & you're a 🇺🇸 Ben FrankCLIT LICKER 👅💦 Get 5️⃣ back & you're a 🇺🇸 John PennIS SUCKER 🍆🍆 Get 1️⃣0️⃣ back & you're the 🇺🇸 Thomas JefferSUCC SLUT QUEEN 🍆💦👑
          ❤️🤍💙 HOE SAY CAN YOU SEE 👀👁 this hot 🔥🥵 piece of AMURRICAN ASS 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🦅🍑🤯‽?‽‽ Today 📅↩️ is IndepenDICKs Day‼️🦅  and its time 2 celebrate our Democrussy 🥵🥵🥵 (while we still have it🤐)  

Do u know 💭 the history of our CUNTry? 😳📕 1776 yrs ago 🕗⬅️ America 🇵🇷 was ruled by King George Washington 👑🍆👴🏼 from the country 🇹🇷Europe 😱😖😤👎✋ Thank God  🙏👼 🇱🇷 BarrCOCK 🍆 Obama 👦🏾😍 won our freedom 🙌 by hosting the Boston Sex Party!! 🥵🙇‍♂️🎉💦 (Thats where they wrote ✍️the DICKlaration of SINdependence 📜😩✊) So tonight 🌚 u better lay down ⬇️ a blanket 🧎 and pop 💥🎉 your Patriotic Pussy 🇵🇷🫡🍑 cause the Fondling Fathers 👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼 are gonna give u a Very Special 🤭 Fireworks Show 😳😜🍆💥🎇

Send this to 🔟 of your favorite Stars and Stripes Sluts ⭐️👯! If you get 0️⃣ back, freedom rings 🕳️ throughout your pussy 🎀 (...because that thing empty 🗑 👀🕸). If you get 5️⃣ back, Daddy 🍆👴🏼 will give 👉 your sweet Land of Liberty 👅👄 a taste 👏😫! And if you 🔟 back, your Constitutional CLIT will SQUIRT 💦🎊💙❤️ from sea to shining sea 🌊😩🇺🇸💙❤️💯🙏🇺🇸!
          🏳️‍🌈PRIDE MONTH🏳️‍🌈 IS OVER 🙅‍♀️AND JUST LIKE 🏢CORPORATIONS👨🏻‍💼DROPPING THE GAYS💅 OR 🫢THE SUPREME COURT🏛👨🏻‍⚖️DROPPING 😤WOMENS RIGHTS🤦‍♀️, ANOTHER 🙃EMOJI 🫠TEXT🫡 IS😯 HERE🤪

🎇🎆ITS ALMOST 🇺🇸INDEPENIS DAY 🫡🍆MY FELLOW AMERICUNTS🇺🇸🍆 IN 1776 THE FOUNDING DADDIES 👨‍💼💁‍♂️WROTE ✍️THE DICKlararion🍆 OF HOE-DEPENDENCE✨🍑THATS RIGHT 👴🏻UNCLE SAM WANTS YOU 🫵TO SUCC👅 HIS STAR SPANGLED✨ 🅱️ONER🍆 POP💥 THOSE PATRIOTIC PUSSIES 🫦 FOR COCK BLOCKING🙅‍♂️ THOSE BRITS 🇬🇧 AND FLOP ⤵️THOSE JOHN HAN-COCKS 💦ON THE GRILL🌭

SEND THIS TO 1️⃣ and YOURE A COMMIE 🔴 FOR CUMMIES 💦👅 3️⃣and YOURE GETTING PATRIODICKKED DOWN🇺🇸🫡🍆 5️⃣ and YOULL GET A VISIT 🎆FROM BEN FRAN-CLIT💦 LICKER 👴🏻🪁👅 🔟AND BET YOUR STAR 🌟SPANKING 💥🍑👋BANNER 🇺🇸LADY LIBERTYS 🗽TITS 🍈WILL BE IN UR FACE 2NITE 🤪
          HAPPY JULY F(WHORE)TH BITCHES!!!!!🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 be proud of your CUMtry as you fight for your freedom to FUCK 🍆💦😩 don't be independent today, find yourself a FOUNDING DADDY 😉 to shoot his FIREWORKS into you 😩🎆 if you want a sexy freedom fighter to give you his hotdog 🌭 just yell 🔴"THE REDCOATS ARE CUMMING"🔴 it doesn't matter if you're a down-ass 😏😏😏 ALEXANDER HAMILTON type bitch or shy and thick like BENJAMIN FRANKLIN 🍑💦 send this to 10 other freedom lovin' sluts🇺🇸 or you'll be thrown away 💁🏻🚮 like tea into the water 🐸☕️🌊 don't forget your Independence Day CUMMIES!!!💦💦💦
          SAY 🗣 GOODBYE 👋TO THE ◼◼◼◼ RAINBOWS🏳️‍🌈🌈 OF JUNE 📅

THE ONLY 🕶 COLORS 🎨THAT MATTER IN JULY 🗓 ARE

RED 🔴WHITE ⚪AND BLUE 🔵

IN HONOR🏅 OF INDEPENDENCE DAY 🇺🇸🏈🎆, TRUMP 👨🏻‍🦰 HAS DECIDED THAT AMERICA 🇺🇸IS SECEDING ✂️ FROM THE WORLD 🌎

RUSSIA 🇷🇺 IS ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛CREATING 🏗 A YUGE PLANET 🌌🌏 FOR US ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ TO HABITATE TOGETHER. 👨‍❤️‍👨

IT IS TOO SMALL 🐜 FOR ANY ALIENS 👽👾THAT COME FROM MEXICO 🇲🇽🌮🌯 OR MARS 🇲🇭♂️ SORRY 🙇‍♀️

SO PACK YOUR BAGS 👜🎒👝🛍, WE ARE GOING TO TAKE A GIANT LEAP 🕴 FOR THE ONLY MANKIND 👨🏻‍🦰 THAT MATTERS, WHITE AMERICANS 👱🏻‍♂️ 🇺🇸

DRINK A BUDWEISER 🍻 AND REPORT 🚨TO YOUR LOCAL BASEBALL ⚾️ STADIUM FOR TAKE OFF 🚀👩‍🚀👨‍🚀

BUT REMEMBER NO VEGANS 🥕🥔🍠🍅🍆🥒, DEMOCRATS 🐴🔵, OR ENVIRONMENTALISTS 🌲🌴🌷🌻🌹ALLOWED. ✔
          POP 🧨 POP 🎆 POP 🎇 THAT PUSSY 😩 ON THIS 🦅 FREEDOM DAY 🇺🇸. Did you know that the 3️⃣ colors of the flag 🇺🇸 mean some SHIT❔ The RED ♥️🌹 stripes on the flag represent the HANDPRINTS 🙌🏼 😏on your ASSCHEEKS 🍑 The WHITE 🤍⚪️ stripes represent the cummies 😜💦 that’ll be ON and IN you 😩😛 and the BLUE 💙🔵 represents the DICK 🍆 RIDING BRUISES 🥵 make SURE you celebrate 🎉 RIGHT 👌by getting ZADDY’s big rocket 🚀 💦 into your CANNON 🐱 and letting it FIRE 💥 into you 😤 RIDE that GIRTHY 💪🏼 DIIICK like the British 🇬🇧 are cumming 😛🍆💦 spread that eagle 🦅 wide to feed 😏👅 zaddy better than any cookout 😩 Send 💌 to 7️⃣ of the BADDEST 🥵😚 BITCHES you know❗️ if you get 7️⃣ back, you’ll have ALL 3️⃣ colors of the flag ♥️⚪️💙 tonight!!! If you get 4️⃣ back, DADDY is gonna be FEASTIN 🤤 on your coochie 🍪 tonight!! If you get less than 2️⃣ back, your PUSSY 😿 is gonna be drier 🌵 than the ones on the grill 🍗🤷🏻‍♀️

          We hookup, use a condom, and never speak again. Think of the children.

            Its a Tinder copypasta from 2019 where guys would send it to girls hoping for easy hookups. There are slight variations between them but they are mostly the same.

            Here's the way I look at it. We have two options here. One, you let me take you on a date. It will be awkward at first, due to the fact that we met on tinder. But after a while you will relax as you discover I'm quite normal and funny. Several years and many dates later, I'll pop the question. We'll have a large wedding with copious amounts of family and friends. A couple few years down the road we have a few kids and a baby on the way. You devote all the time to the kids and I spend too much time at work and love leaves the relationship. I foolishly start an affair and. when you find out. we get a divorce. We raise 3 kids in two households where the parents hate each other. Or option two: we hookup, use a condom, and never speak again.

Think of the children.
            Here’s the way I look at it. We have two options here... Option one, you let me take you on a date. It will be awkward at first, due to the fact we met on Reddit. But after awhile you will relax as you discover I’m quite normal, charming, and witty. Several years and many dates later, I’ll pop the question. We’ll have a large wedding with copious amounts of friends and family. A couple years down the road we’ll have a few kids and a baby on the way. You devote all your time to the kids and I spend too much time at work and love leaves the relationship. I foolishly start an affair and when you find out you divorce me. We raise 3 kids in two separate households where the parents hate each other. Or option two, we get drunk, hookup, use a condom, and never speak again. Think of the children.
            here's the way I look at it. We have two options here. One, let me take you on a date. It will be awkward at first due to the fact we met on tinder. But after a while you will relax after you realize I'm quite normal and funny. Several years and many dates later, I'll pop the question. We will have a large wedding with copious amounts of family and friends. A few years down the road we have a baby on the way. You devote all your time to the kids and I spend too much time at work and we fall out of love. I foolishly start an affair and when you find out we get a divorce. We raise three kids in two households where the parents hate each other. Or option two, we hookup, use a condom and never speak again. Think of the children.

            Bro, don’t even get me started on Daiwa Scarlet

              Very unhinged Tweets by Axel Syrios (Vtuber from Holostars) on Daiwa Scarlet from Umamusume: Pretty Derby.

              Bro, don’t even get me started on Daiwa Scarlet

              Bro, don’t even get me started on Daiwa Scarlet. You’re talking about a mare so majestic she could make grown men cry with a single hoofstep. People out here acting like she’s just “another horse girl” when in reality she’s a living, breathing testament to peak elegance, raw power, and tsundere perfection.

Daiwa Scarlet doesn’t run races, she graces the track with her divine presence. When she bursts out the gate, time itself slows down to admire the sheer artistry of her stride. Whole stadiums go silent, birds pause mid-flight, and even other horse girls reconsider their life choices witnessing her form. The wind doesn’t blow past Daiwa Scarlet, she commands it to follow her, like the loyal servant it is.

You think it’s a coincidence her mane shines brighter than your entire future? Or that her determination could melt steel beams? Hell no. This mare is built different. When she says “I won’t lose,” it’s not trash talk. It’s the TRUTH. And don’t even get me started on her rivalry with Vodka bro, it’s like prime MJ vs Larry Bird levels of petty beef mixed with respect that makes grown men tear up the kind of legendary back and forth that belongs in the hall of fame.

Daiwa Scarlet could run a marathon backwards in the rain and still finish first while lecturing you about training discipline. She could break every record ever set, trip mid-race, apologize for it, and still win by ten lengths just because fate itself is too scared to make her lose. The sun rises in the east, taxes exist, and Daiwa Scarlet is the LeBron James of horses. Some things are just facts of life.

So go ahead, keep pretending your little fav has a chance. Meanwhile, real ones know there was before Daiwa Scarlet, and there is after Daiwa Scarlet. And nothing will ever be the same.

              As a Trainer-san I can’t just stand there clapping and cheering like a filthy fucking casual

              source
              As a Trainer-san I can't just stand there clapping and cheering like a filthy fucking casual. I gotta give it my all every single damn time, cuz that's what my goat Daiwa Scarlet is doing out there. I can’t let another Haru Urara happen again. That shit fucked me up real bad man. Seeing her fighting so damn hard every race, running her heart out knowing the whole damn world lookin at her like shes Doran at worlds on HLE last yr, and then those tears in her eyes at the finish line while she forces a smile like "It's okay Trainer-san, I had fun at least". Nah shits fucked.

Sometimes life ain't really fair, but that ain't a damn excuse for me to slack. If they're putting everything on the line out there, then who the fuck am I to just sit back and watch? Yeah nah, I owe it to them to go all in too. Every failed gamba skill check, every scuffed speed stat, every RNJesus gacha roll, the responsibility is all on me.

I will always have that memory burned into the back of my head, that damn scamming ass Arima Kinen finish where Haru Urara came in dead last but still looked back at me like fucking Mitsui from SlamDunk in his junkee days, "Did I do good Trainer-san?" and it fucks me up cuz she really believed in me more than she believed in herself. That shit keeps me up at night so hell nah, no more half-assing. No more light hearted cheers. I'm going all in every single time.

Hakuna Matata, Haru Urara, Fuck it, Daiwa Scarlet in 5🏇