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The art of the copypasta

    POV you said copypastas doesn't affect you
    The art of the copypasta is an ancient technique used by multiple generations across the world. It is a staple of mocking culture, a cornerstone. You're saying that, because "it's a secondhand insult, it does not affect me". Do I need to tell you how stupid that statement that is? Do you know how politicians get their votes halved? Exactly, by the media. "B-b-but how does the media do this?????" I hear you ask. Well, they use their own words against them. Just because you said something doesn't mean you are ''immune'' to any insult involved with that saying. Your pathetic little brain isn't able to even comprehend basic karma and I do not have a smidge of empathy for your inevitable failure in life. The author of a terribly written book is never immune to criticism. "Well, they spent a lot of time into writing the book so-" Shut Up. No. The mere cringe I experience when you speak using that voice of yours and its very own screeching nagging tone is close to infinite. The sheer inability of your mind to get a grasp of modern culture and society is a massive red flag involving all your future interactions with actually competent beings. I actively yearn for the day that your IQ surpasses 7 but alas, it'll sadly never happen.
    
    Kind Regards,
    
    me

    Tiananmen Square Copypasta

      动态网自由门 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣 臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏 土伯特 唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主 言論 思想 反共 反革命 抗議 運動 騷亂 暴亂 騷擾 擾亂 抗暴 平反 維權 示威游行 李洪志 法輪大法 大法弟子 強制斷種 強制堕胎 民族淨化 人體實驗 肅清 胡耀邦 趙紫陽 魏京生 王丹 還政於民 和平演變 激流中國 北京之春 大紀元時報 九評論共産黨 獨裁 專制 壓制 統一 監視 鎮壓 迫害 侵略 掠奪 破壞 拷問 屠殺 活摘器官 誘拐 買賣人口 遊進 走私 毒品 賣淫 春畫 賭博 六合彩 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Winnie the Pooh 劉曉波动态网自由门

      I just nutted to your comment

        FAQ
        
        What does this mean?
        The amount of cum (semen) on my phone and Reddit phone has increased by one.
        
        Why did you do this?
        There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of cum. These include, but are not limited to:
        • ⁠you being a femboy, • ⁠Spreading sti infections, • ⁠Sarcasm correctly flagged with a /s.
        
        Am I banned from the Reddit?
        No. But you should make comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to not cum.
        
        I don't believe my comment deserved a nut. Can you un-nut to it?
        Sure,  mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo  a nut. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot your nut on me. I  tend to respond to Being shot with nut within several minutes. Do note,  however, that over 99.9% of nut appeals are rejected, and yours is  likely no exception.
        
        How can I prevent this from happening in the future?
        Accept  the nut and move on. your behavior will be nutted to on Reddit.com. I  will continue to nut until you stop boing so hot 😩 Remember: I’m horny  uwu

        TIFU trying to poop on a cockroach

          smh the cockroach didn't crawl up his ass
          This monster cockroach had taken up residence in my bathroom for like the last year but whenever I tried to catch him he would always slip my grasp. About 10 minutes ago I finally corner the bastard in a cartoon box. I find a way to maneuver the roach into the toilet without wasting any time, and a sense of victory washes over me. But is this enough? Oh hell no I want this fucker to suffer. I decide I'm going to drop a load on him before I flush him, a dishonorable sendoff. So I get on the toilet and start going to work. It starts coming out and this is one solid log I had been holding on to for about half an hour (because xbox) I aim by looking through my legs, all is going well, the log is right on coarse. Eventually it makes contact, and this is when all hell breaks lose. The roach goes full rambo and climbs UP MY SHIT towards my butthole! I panic and start jumping around like a 50's housewife who just spotted a rat. Mind you my log hadn't been broken yet so I'm spreading that shit all over the bathroom in the process. Best part? The little bastard got away. Now I'm sitting on my computer procrastinating cleaning my bathroom covered in fecal matter.

          There’s no more cum left on Earth.

            Only the cumbender can save society then
            Open
            You're lying down in your bed, bringing you hands to your mouth once more to lubricate your penis. You've been masturbating for one hour now, yet you still haven't came and your penis is beginning to absorb your saliva, becoming a sticky, burning hot rod. Furiously, you begin to accelerate your masturbation rapidly. By two hours, your cock is burning in pain yet there is not a single drop of cum - not even precum.
            
            Meanwhile, next door, a girl is masturbating too, on stream, but they can't reach orgasm. In desperation, the girl has resorted to using multiple dildos inside her pussy, but even that is no use. The girl then makes a makeshift sex machine from a dildo and an electric power tool - once again, this is futile. She punches her pillow in defeat.
            
            By three hours, you've given up trying to cum and gone downstairs to watch more anime. However, upon seeing an anime girl fall over and have a panty shot, you feel the need to cum again. Biting your arm to lead the the pain away from your penis, you rapidly masturbate. By four hours, you're screaming as your rough masturbation soon rips the skin cells off your dick. Your cock is now a burning red giant, but there is no cum left - any precum that was there has evaporated.
            
            Meanwhile, the girl screams too - not because of finally reaching orgasm, but because they've gone so long without one that they've resorted to anything. Rapidly pushing the small cactus in and outside of herself, the girl's toe curl on bed sheets as blood flows out from her vaginal entrance. body spasming in pain - but still, she does not orgasm. The world is getting even more desperate.
            
            Suddenly, you get a discord notification from a friend, saying they've been trying to cum to Dream x George fanfiction, but they've ended up making their cock a, quote, "burning red giant." Your eyes open in shock horror - it can't be, can it? You rush to the television to ask your waifu how to resolve this mystery when you find that the TV has replaced the anime with an emergency government announcement - there's a new disease preventing orgasms... and its contagious. You feel as if you're about to faint, quickly looking up if there's a cure - there is none. You screech in anger, knowing that your waifu will never love you if you can't pour semen all over a shitty print out of her.
            
            Meanwhile, the girl cries, double fisting her bleeding self as she shrieks in rage, desperate to orgasm. What on Earth can a female do in life if they cannot orgasm? The girl is realising her chatterbate viewers are going down - she needs this orgasm. Realising that there is no hope, she illogically becomes even more desperate, suddenly barging into her brother's room, who is lying naked on the floor, dick ripped off next to a knife; the disease has claimed its first victim. She shoves the dick in her pussy, crying as the lactic acid burns her arm as she rapidly accelerates her brother's dethatched cock in and out, but it's no use: she has the disease.
            
            Suddenly, both of them stop. There's a large siren and a warning appears on the televisions of every house in the world, "There is no more cum." The world quickly devolves and you hear a car crash into your house. Out of nowhere, a man grabs you by the neck, desperately shoving his cock in your ass in the need of cum, raping you. Yet, it's no use - the man has the disease, and so do you. Luckily, there's a gun to the side and you manage to pry the discord moderator off, before killing him.
            
            Given a few weeks, society practically doesn't exist - it's like the apocalypse. Crime rates have skyrocketed as people loot dildo shops. The hospitals are beginning to crumble as more and more women show up with more and more exotic accidents. Meanwhile men are being completely taken over by their horniness: a female reporter is stood outside, reporting where the disease was first reported, and you feel the urge. You and the cameraman both turn on her trust, stripping her down and savagely pummelling her, but it's not use - you can not cum. The woman shouts, enraged too, for she can not orgasm either. Children in high school are to scared to go outside and you don't blame them, knowing what sickening lows you may succumb too once this disease truly takes control. Other children, who had already been on discord and thus knew about sex thanks to the moderators, have began spiralling into madness too - high schools have become orgies, with devastating costs to the countries IQ, you think.
            
            Eighty years pass and the human population plummets. Listening to Prokofiev's "Death of Tybalt" in your asylum room, you attempt to masturbate one more time. Unbeknownst to you, your the last human on the planet. Entire families have killed each other, each one raping the others corpse, foolishly believing from online sources that necrophilia was the cure. Men and women have killed themselves in spectacular accidents, dying in human crushes as hundreds of orgy-goers suffocate naked. Young teenagers have formed sex cults, praying to bizarre dank memes whilst furiously fucking each other in the hope that somehow, a fucking meme removes the symptoms of a disease. Like you thought, the IQ of the general population has lowered. However, you know better, you know there's no cure so you separated yourself from the idiots, hiding away in this asylum with a few staff who have recently died too... And you still can't cum. Wailing in sadness, you scratch and tear at your cock, wishing it to hell. Eventually, with enough force, you rip your sexual organ clean off and force it into your metal handcuffs.
            
            "What's this?" You think - it worked. The handcuffs are unlocked. You look outside to the asylum balcony. You can finally escape this petty world. "How men and women have fallen so far." You think, "To go from civil creatures to savage beasts, killing and raping everything in their path." You shake your head, thinking of the NatGeoWild documentaries you used to watch about savage apes. With a curse to the sky, the disease claims it's last life as the host throws itself off the balcony. Human life is gone and now, the disease has become animal born too. A few thousand years pass and there are no complex life forms at all...
            
            There's no more cum left on Earth.