Finally caught my GF pooping!
she always hide it by pretending like she doesn't, which I find sus. Once when we spent the entire weekend together I almost caught her but she had locked the bathroom door and by the time I got in she had flushed and was like "oh hey what's up?" pretending like nothing happened, although there was an OBVIOUS lingering odor. Anyway, this time I was prepared, sprung the lock and burst in on her mid-wipe. She frantically tried to spin & flush but I smacked her hand away and pushed her off the toilet to get a better look in (it was a goddamn big dump ). Caught red handed, I pointed my finger at her and said I FUCKING KNEW IT! Initially she tried to blame my cat but eventually admitted defeat.
I'm just happy I dumped her and now I am gonna find a GF who does not poop.
Caught my gf pooping…so I broke up with her. 😡 She said shes off to pee while were watching a movie, now shes been gone 5 minutes and i knew something was up, i knocked on the door and asked if everything is ok, she said yes she'll be right out…her voice was labored and i became suspicious…so i yelled "IM COMING IN!' she screamed no but there was no stopping this, i smashed through the door and i see her sitting on the toilet seat, i told her to get the fuk up, she didnt so i threw her off, i looked inside the toilet…just as i suspected, a goddam log, bitch u better pray this isnt yours. i looked around and saw no pet in site, I KNOW THIS IS UR POOP U WHORE, she screamed at me that im crazy and that shes calling the cops, all the while toilet paper in her hands. i told her no need to call the cops, im breaking up with u u some kinda poop whore. and that was that. I feel like a new man and off to find a woman who doesnt poop. 👌 Real men don’t settle for less…
