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LowTierGod

    Your life is nothing, you serve zero purpose, you should kill yourself NOW, and give somebody else a piece of that oxygen in the ozone layer that's covered up so we can breathe inside of this blue trapped bubble.
    
    Like what are you even here for? To worship me? Kill yourself. and I mean that with a hundred percent, with a thousand percent.

    Look thick. Solid. Tight.

      Awesome pics. Great size. Look thick. Solid. Tight. Keep us all posted on your continued progress with any new progress pics or vid clips. Show us what you got man. Wanna see how freakin' huge, solid, thick and tight you can get. Thanks for the motivation
      Awesome biceps man. Great size. Look thick. Solid. Tight. Keep us all posted on your continued progress with any new progress pics or vid clips. Show us what you got man. Wanna see how freakin' huge, solid, thick and tight you can get. Thanks for the motivation.

      Every morning I wake up…

        The life of a massive penis haver
        Every morning I wake up and I have to carry my massive penis over my shoulder so it doesn’t drag on the floor, I go to the bathroom and while sitting on the toilet I need to aim my penis in the urinal(they built a different urinal for me) because if I piss in the commod my penis will drop into the water(which is nasty). Every time I go to school I need to make sure I hide it properly so I wear large hoodies and utilize my penis as my belt. It takes me 2 hours to shower just so i can clean my penis properly, everytime I masturbate my cum releases from my penis the day after because the travel distance is so long. When I get an erection, the blood flow to my legs completely stops and I cannot stand or move. They almost cut my penis when I was born thinking it was my umbilical cord. Every girl I’ve had a chance to be with has been scared of me and ran away crying. This is the life of a fellow massive penis haver.

        My 86-year-old grandmother replied “OK, boomer” to my boomer aunt in an argument

          Based Grandma
          Backstory: I live round the corner from my gran and visit her often so thanks to me she has a vague grasp of what memes are and how they work. The other day when I was round at hers and she asked what memes were popular at the moment so I told her about the "OK boomer" meme. She knew what boomers were already so she was able to get the concept of this meme fairly easily.
          
          Fast forward to today, I'm over at my gran's again, and she's on the phone to my aunt. They got into a disagreement over a slightly racist comment my aunt made the other day (my gran is very much against racism) and my gran eventually just said "OK boomer" and hung up.
          
          I've never been so proud.
          
          UPDATE: So I told my gran about this post and the reaction it got - she said she's glad that so many of you enjoyed her little joke and that it proves she's still young at heart. I agree with that 100%.

          Heroin Nazi Rapist DM

            “Heroin Nazi Rapist DM” doesn’t exists in any pasta archives. Y’all got baited hard by a greentext post on 4chan that was crossposted on Reddit. Jebaited hard and left to dust.

            Oldest 4chan trick in the book. Reference something interesting then pretend it's actually too hardcore to post, just to troll.
            99% chance it doesn’t exist

            After watching squid game, I thought Koreans were made up

              I can relate! After watching squid game, I thought Koreans were made up, but then I saw one in real life and I couldn't believe my eyes 😯. I walked up to it and asked it to be my Gganbu. It seemed confused, and I explained that it was Korean, like from squid game, to which it replied "Dude, I'm Filipino". After he introduced himself as "Phillip Inyo", I told him my Korean name was Saegin ​​Geum, so he'd feel more comfortable with me. He gave me a weird look, and told me to leave him alone. This confused me, but I then realized that I had to show him how well endowed I was with Korean culture (after watching squid game in sub 😌 instead of dub 🤢, I feel that I have a strong grasp of Korean culture 🇯🇵)! As he walked away, I ran up and blocked his path, and announced that I challenged him to a round of squid game! I noticed that he looked rather confused, or even scared, so I whipped out my Samsung phone (also korean btw) and played the squid game theme as I ran up to him and attempted to tackle him. He yelled at me to "get off him" and called me a "racist prick", which I didn't remember from squid game (I watched it in sub 😌 instead of dub 🤢 because I am cultured, so I would have remembered seeing it). Afterwards, I was approached by another Korean in a police uniform! He then claimed I was "under arrest" for "assault". It was at that point that I realized he must be a guard, just like from squid game! I asked him why he was out of his squid game uniform, to which he replied "I'm Japanese, you moron" (idk why all these Koreans are introducing themselves, but they're very polite! 😊). After Jappa Knees put me in his police cruiser, a stunning realization hit me... I was being taken to participate in the squid games 🤩! Throughout the ride, I asked him how many other participants were going to be in the game this round, but he would either ignore me or tell me to "shut up". I also said that I wasn't in debt or anything, so I didn't really have a need for the prize money, but he continued to not respond (which I understood, he must have been a circle guard or something). After we got to a building that said "police station" (which isn't Korean, I know because I watched squid game in sub 😌 and not dub 🤢, so I can tell Korean words apart from English words), I had my photograph taken (just like in squid game!) and was put in a cell, with a few other contestants. While I waited for the first game to begin, I asked the other contestants how much debt they had accumulated. After hours of asking them and not getting a response, they all started to beat the absolute shit out of me. That's when I realized that the first game had begun! Before I could fight back though, one of the guards came in and broke up the fight. I noticed that no one had died yet, so I tried asking the guards what the prize pool was at, to which they told me to "shut up" (I watched the squid game show in sub 😌 instead of dub 🤢, so I could tell that "shut up" was not a Korean term, kinda sus). After spending a couple days in there, they said I was free to go, which made me sad because that means I had missed out on the prize money 😔. That just goes to show that I just wasn't prepared for the squid games. A few days later, I got a letter about a "court date". I was thrilled 😁! I called the number on the front and told them I would like to participate in the squid games again! I was also sure to mention that I watched the show in sub 😌 instead of dub 🤢, to which they then abruptly hung up on me (just like in squid game!). My "court date" is about 1 week away, and I'm so excited! This time, I'm gonna be sure that I'm ready to eliminate whoever is there for that big cash reward! Wish me luck 👍!