"actually i remember one time, we were playing against virtus.pro, nuke, and it was 15-5 to vp. we were playing as t and vp are ct. and fallen said, 'guys, if you think we are good, let's prove it now.' 15-5."
"did we come back"?
"of course not. 16-5."
It almost never fails. My best friend I got back home after baseball and he hit me with his infamous deez nuts jokes again. I hate that I fall for most of them and I hate how he delivers the punchline so sensually. "Imagine Dragon deez nuts across your face." "Deez nuts in your mouth" "Howsma cock feel in your mouth." "Stigma dick in your ass." At some point the jokes don't even make sense like "Let me stuff my cock down your throat." "Suck on my fat juicy nuts." Instead of me finding it funny, I just get turned on instead. I'm like "go ahead bitch I'm waiting." It's like that meme "jokes on you I'm into that shit." It's worse when we're sweaty, naked, adrenaline still pumping in the locker rooms after a game right before a shower and he pulls out his wonderful jokes. It's like he's *trying* to make me hard on purpose. I'm almost certain he knows what he's doing. But I kinda love it. I joke back with him too and he falls for mine but I still feel a lot of sexual tension. How could you look another man in the eyes and say "I'm gonna stuff my cock down your throat." without someone getting a hard-on.
Hey fellow Morbheads, just finished my 26th viewing of the legendary film (Morbius) and I have but one word to describe the experience: Wow. The film was incredible, to put it lightly. I thought I had noticed everything there was to notice on my 10th go, but I wasn’t even close. Jared Leto’s performance leaves so much up to interpretation, and he truly builds the character presented for is in the MCU(Morbius Cinematic Universe). Every rewatch that I view just leads me further into the Morbi-hole(a term I coined just now), and I spot things I never would’ve seen on my first few gos. The world isn’t ready for Morbius - and I wasn’t either. When I say that I broke into tears every time I watched it, all 26 times, I’m not lying. I cried during the entire movie. I’m not even sure how my body is producing more tears, but I make sure to stock up on XL popcorn and 3 drinks each viewing. My tears are pure sugar water, butter flows through my veins.
Anyway, I’ll try to keep this review short, as the credits are finishing up and I’m about to go in for my 27th round, but know this; Morbius is one of the greatest movies of our generation - or better, this decade. The raw power behind each scene is only amplified by Jared Leto’s stellar performance. If he doesn’t win every Oscar available, I’ll be shocked. To say it was a masterpiece is an understatement. On my 15th viewing, I heard someone yawn during one of the dialogue scenes. I followed him up to the parking lot and decapitated him with my limited editionTM Morbius Blade. (Shop morbiusmerch.com) Please - if you haven’t already, do yourself a favor. Watch Morbius, and watch it again. And again. And again. You won’t regret it.
cum sock: your secret cum sock that you hide in under your bed. If your mother finds this she will send you to military school. Your stepsister wears this sock on her gear during sex and empties her snot on it. This sock has a very special place in your heart and if you lose it then you are going to cut off your pp. If you cut off your pp then your step sister will no longer like you and call you a dickless pussy. This makes you sad so you suck your best friends pp and it tastes like your cum sock and now you are sad. This is really just a plot of the government and they filmed you having anal sex with you cousin and they put it on PornHub. Now you are a famous porn star and the government gets 69% of your income without you knowing. You become homeless and start sucking more pp on the streets. You make your way up in the ranks of street pp sucking and now you become the lord of pps. Since you are the lord of pps you go back on to pornhub and you become instantly famous but the Soviet Union was making fake porn videos And were making more money then you were and so u started crying and grew your pp back. Then your step sister came back and you made Russian pornos with the sock on your step sisters head once again and you are reunited with your true found Alabama love.
Sex. I’m in my 20s and I haven’t had real life sex yet for many reasons. So I thought why don’t I try it in a lucid dream… With my anime husband 👉🏼👈🏼. Real men suck and my only love is frickin Levi Ackerman 🤦🏻♀️✨. So more or less I guess I can truly say I lost my virginity on wedding night ……to Levi Ackerman 🤦🏻♀️. Since this is all in my lucid realm I thought of pretty nasty was to do the “nasty.” And I think since this is still literally a dream there is a significance behind this. I like him just fucking me whenever he wants wherever he wants without me properly giving him permission. I enjoy giving into submission ( wow I did not mean for this to rhyme lol). And since I said we have sex wherever, that includes outdoors in public where we can get caught. And I get a big rush from getting caught. And when the sex is in a public place, I like to have all my clothes ripped off me completely naked while Levi is still fully clothed . I enjoy getting caught by others and I play along acting like “ oh my god! No what are you doing here!?” And Levi doesn’t care that his cadets and comrades see us and continues to fuck me so hard. And the “worse” it gets the more I enjoy it. Like I allowed phones in my weird AOT lucid dreaming realm. They circle around us . And start recording, and someone gets a nice close video of Levi’s dick pounding my pussy, as I go “ you guys are jerks!”(remember, I’m playing along, I love this.) And then there’s cheering “ fuck her harder!” And Levi goes “ SHE’LL BE PREGNANT BY THE END OF THIS!” Then he cums and someone has to ask “ so… are you guys having a boy or a girl?” If it’s not me getting caught getting pregnant in public, it’s getting gangbanged or publicly humiliated gangbanged by criminals until my husband rescues me. Yes, there is gagging and tying up in the forced gangbang scenarios. Idk why. In real life I only wanna have sex with one person ever. But if I get raped in a lucid dream it makes me feel wanted??? And I don’t feel guilty about 100 dicks in my that aren’t my husband because it was rape and not my fault and he rescues me in the end.
In real life I obviously don’t want a gangbang or hookups. I never wish rape or sexual assault on anyone. But in Lucid dreams in fuckin sexy fun because I created it.
Im convinced I’m secretly nasty in my dreams because I put on the face of an innocent good girl in real life.
STOP SAYING TOUHOU IS ANIME! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME JAPANESE GOBLIN, ON DISCORD MEMORIES OF PHANTASM! I was in a server, right? and ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just asking "what anime are these". I-I showed my Marisa Figurine to my girlfriend and t-the big eyes I looked at it and I said "hey babe, when the Touhou is anime HAHA Shiranai wa sonna mahou Omoi wa tsutaetara kowarechau Anata to wa chigau kara Hito no kokoro made kantan ni nusumanaide" I fucking looked at a apple and said "THAT'S A BAD APPLE" I looked at Remelia I think of two zero zero eight three four and I go "HEY MISTER, WANNA HAVE S-" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHGESFG