Of everyone on Golden State, open shot, the fate of the universe on the line, the Martians have the death beam pointed at earth, you better hit it, I WANT IGUODALA.
So my gf(f19), was over and we were casually watching The Empire Strikes Back(I am 19 btw). And then, the Han freezing in carbonite scene came, and when Leia said 'I love you' to him, I kissed my gf. She was taken aback, and soon she started kissing me too. I slowly pushed her down on the bed as we had more steamy, passionate and romantic kissing. In no time, our clothes were off, and I was ready to put it in. But our dumbasses forgot to pause the movie... As soon as I was putting it in, the 'I am your father' line came and I instantly got harder. My gf was loving this. I put it in her. She screamed with joy. I was also having fun. But then, the Imperial march started playing. I felt something come over me. The Sith shall rise. In my anger and lust for power I force choked my girlfriend. My journey to the Dark Side was complete. Luke's resistance and weakness to join the darkside completely enraged me. I am now marching all the way to Los Angeles to beat up Mark Hamill with my lightsaber.
If you only knew the power of the Dark Side, Luke
Like its just 2 balls with tiny dots at the end as a gay dude i don’t understand 😃🔫 EDIT: after 60 replies i came to a conclusion, being: Because squish squish bounce bounce jingle jongle wibble wobble mommy milkers soft 😩
EDIT2: i got asked y i dont like em and im just gonna say. Trauma that involves a shower and my naked grandma 🥰
CEASE AND DESIST LETTER/RESTRAINING ORDER
X/X/20XX
Dear PersonName:
This CEASE AND DESIST ORDER is to inform you that your harassing and intimidating actions against me has become unbearable. Such anti-social behavior is completely unacceptable and will not be tolerated in any way, shape or form. This letter is to demand that your harassment and intimidation must CEASE AND DESIST immediately. Should you continue to pursue these activities in violation of this CEASE AND DESIST ORDER, we will not hesitate to pursue further legal action against you, including, but not limited to, civil action and/or criminal complaints.
Please note that I have a right to remain free from your intimidating tactics, and we will take the responsibility upon ourselves to protect that right. Note that a copy of this letter and a record of its delivery will be stored. Note too that it is admissible as evidence in a court of law and will be used as such if need be in the future.
This CEASE AND DESIST ORDER demands that you immediately discontinue and do not at any point in the future under any circumstances do the following to me: speak to, contact, pursue, harass, attack, strike, threaten, telephone (via cellular or landline), instant message, page, fax, email, disturb my peace, keep me under surveillance, gather information about and/or block my movements at home, work, social gatherings or religious functions, as well as contact via reddit.com
Note that your behavior is a violation of Federal Criminal Statutes 47 USC 223(a)(1)(c) - Obscene or Harassing Telephone Calls in the District of Columbia or in Interstate or Foreign Communications; District of Columbia Code, Title 22, Section 504 - Threatened Assault in a Menacing Manner; Stalking
Additionally note that your behavior is a violation of US Federal Laws 18 USC Subsection 2265 Full Faith and Credit, 18 USC Subsection 2261A Interstate Stalking, 18 USC Subsection 875(c) Interstate Communications, 47 USC Subsection 223(a)(1)(c) Harassing Telephone Calls in Interstate Communications
Should you willfully choose to continue your current course of action, I will not hesitate to file a complaint with the Reddit Administration for your ongoing violations of the Criminal Laws noted previously.
This letter does not constitute exhaustive statement of my position nor is it a waiver of any of my rights and/or remedies in this and/or any other related matter.
We demand your immediate compliance, and furthermore that you confirm in writing that all volatile activity will cease immediately.
Very truly yours,
Someone special
Sent via XXX
