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Nikocado Avocado tweet

    Nikocado tweet copypasta
    Slam your cock into my Fat GAPING Wet Ass GUSSY Bussy … it be talkin’ and spittin’ , queefing from big juicy cocks😛😛💦💦 * dirty cum farts for cum sluts *😈

    TIFU by jizzing over a house fly

      Jizzing over a housefly TIFU story
      This happened about 20' minutes or so. Buckle up 'cause you're up for a ride.
      
      Late afternoon, im sitting in my bed, and as any teen would, i got horny. Decided to get to it-
      six or so minutes later im in full heat and theres this GOD DAMN FLY! Right now?! I loose concentration of the important matters, now mad at this god dammned fly.
      
      "Time for revenge, scumdog!" i say, as i begin to grip the barrel of the machinegun. The enemy seems to understand the situation and begins evasive manuevers, perhaps, thinking it could get away.
      Round chambered, i begin to aim towards the moving target. It is a risky shot but a succesful hit would mean total, inmediate victory.
      
      I could predate the enemy's sheer, utter panic and state of mind. It KNEW they weren't coming out of this god damn battlefield alive.
      
      "Now's the moment" my mind speaks. I thigthen my grip. Pull the trigger...
      First round. Total miss.
      Second round, "Dont fail me now"... Barely missed. I would say it ricocheted.
      500 miliseconds later, third's the charm... FULL HIT!
      
      Target spirals out of control, warped by the kinetic force of the load.
      
      I begin to, slowly, aproach the fallen oponent. Seems like there's still some movement...
      I grab my (recently polished) bayonet to put it out of his pain.. Until...
      
      Its Alive. Its not just alive. Its thirsty for revenge.
      
      The snow coated soldier begins to raise from it's misery.
      As it raises, higher by every moment, the frosting puddle pulls a string from its injured body, high up and slowly into the cloudy heavens. He's clearly struggling.
      And the chain snaps, he's free from the ground.
      
      "Oh no" I say to myself. Only then did i realize the real potential of the enemy i faced.
      As the white string snapped, the now flying enemy picked up a giant, long droplet.
      
      A CUM PAYLOAD!
      
      As i try to stop the inpact, the fly drops its payload onto my black carpet....
      "Well", that must be all, lets begin the cleanup of the battle... Fool me.
      
      The now Jizz stained Wehrmacht roars the skies. What's about it?, you'd ask.
      Yes, the payload is gone, but. That motherfucker sat on my laptop and left a stain!
      
      And it proceeded to keep sitting in various places leaving micro stains everywhere..
      The room looks like my fucking balls exploded.
      
      Fuck.
      
      TL;DR: splat a fly with jizz and it stained jizz everywhere

      Fuck you. You useless piece of shit.

        Now paste it every time you're in an online argument.
        Fuck you. You’re a worthless piece of shit, an embarrassment to humanity. The scale of your failure is so massive that your name will be used as a symbol of evil. No one could have fucked up as badly as you just did. If divine beings were real, they would have forsaken humanity the moment you were born. You’re a useless, idiotic piece of shit, and no one has ever loved you. Your actions have condemned everyone to suffering, and society will never recover from the chaos you’ve caused. You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to this world, and no amount of apology could make up for what you’ve done. Your existence is a stain on humanity, and no one will ever care about you. Your legacy is one of pure failure. 
        You useless piece of shit. You absolute waste of space and air. You uneducated, ignorant, idiotic dumb swine, you’re an absolute embarrassment to humanity and all life as a whole. The magnitude of your failure just now is so indescribably massive that one hundred years into the future your name will be used as moniker of evil for heretics. Even if all of humanity put together their collective intelligence there is no conceivable way they could have thought up a way to fuck up on the unimaginable scale you just did. When Jesus died for our sins, he must not have seen the sacrilegious act we just witnessed you performing, because if he did he would have forsaken humanity long ago so that your birth may have never become reality. After you die, your skeleton will be displayed in a museum after being scientifically researched so that all future generations may learn not to generate your bone structure, because every tiny detail anyone may have in common with you degrades them to a useless piece of trash and a burden to society. No wonder your father questioned whether or not your were truly his son, for you'd have to not be a waste of carbon matter for anyone to love you like a family member. Your birth made it so that mankind is worse of in every way you can possibly imagine, and you have made it so that society can never really recover into a state of organization. Everything has forever fallen into a bewildering chaos, through which unrecognizable core, you can only find misfortune.

        Open long version

        Even longer version

        I’m taking a break from the ironic gay porn

          I have PTSD

Potential To Suck Dick
          I'm taking a break from the ironic gay porn. Recently I had a dream about me being with half naked oiled up black men for some reason in that dream, I thought it's a joke so I laughed and went along, when I noticed we are in a room, they're taking pictures. Dream me suddenly realized it's not a joke and ran for my life this nightmare had scarred my brain and I think I have PTSD.

          im 😊 sorry but 🍑🍑 your memes ✋ are 🙏 cataclysmically unfunny

            im 😊 sorry but 🍑🍑 your memes ✋ are 🙏 cataclysmically unfunny, 🤗🤗 everytime you 👈 send 💌 one i just 💦 dont get 🉐 a single 🖥 laugh 😂😂 when 😩🕕 watching, 👀 just 🗼 when ⏰ watching, 👀 i cant even 👎⏯ act like they 💆 are 🅱 funny and 🍒 i never get slight joy 😁😊 of your memes, 🐃 they 👵👥 always feel 😁 like 😄🏻 an 😚🏻 inconvenience, and 👏〰 i 💰🚫 dont 💇🙅 like 👉 how 🤔 you 👉 simp for 📀 slump6s (bc 💁💁 he 👦 is 💦 ugly obviously) like, 😪 whats 👋 the point of you 😰👈 sending memes? you ❤ are 📉♀ like 🏼 the 🏼🤥 daily 💰 dose of 👸 internet but way ↕↗ more uninteresting.

            DEJE 🚫✋ EL 💶🏻 BULLYING

              DEJE 🚫✋ EL 💶🏻 BULLYING, 😖👏 EL BULLYING 💦❌ NO ES ⛔⛔ BUENO, 👍 SOLAMENTE 🔫😩 😤🏻 DESTRUYE 😋😋 EL ALMA 👻👻 Y EL 🏿🚽 CEREBRO,
              
              EN VEZ 🤷👍 DE HACER 📌 BIEN, 👍😏 ¿POR QUÉ 💕👌 HACES 👏 MAL? ♀🔑 PONTE A 😒🙏 PENSAR 😩 ANTES 🙇 DE,
              
              DE BURLARTE 🤗🤷 DE ALGUIEN 🤔 MÁS 👋😐 QUE TU 👈💦 PIENSE 🤔 QUE 😬💦 MALTRATA UNA ✨ PERSONA 🙎 🙆 FISICALMENTE 😱👌 O MENTAL TE 👧 HAHCES ♂ IMPORTANTE? 🤣
              
              PUES NO, 💯 EL 👽 CAMBIO ♂😃 SE HACE 🙌🤗 UNO 😈🔥 MISMO 👌📧 CAMBIANDO 🔃