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Albion Online – Reklama tekst

    Albion Online to sandbox MMORPG, w którym to Ty piszesz własną historię, zamiast podążać wytyczoną ścieżką. Odkrywaj ogromny otwarty świat. Wszystko, co robisz, wpływa na zależną od gracza ekonomię Albionu. Każdy element ekwipunku jest tworzony przez graczy z surowców, które sami zbierają. Twój ekwipunek decyduje o tym, kim jesteś. Zamiana z rycerza na maga jest tak prosta, jak zmiana zbroi i broni. Możesz też połączyć elementy obu klas.  Ruszaj w głąb lochów, gdzie znajdziesz zarówno bogactwo jak i zagrożenia. Zrelaksuj się na własnej wyspie, na której możesz postawić dom, sadzić rośliny i hodować zwierzęta. Chwyć za wędkę i ruszaj w kierunku jezior, rzek i oceanów Albionu.  Dołącz do gildii, graj z innymi! Bierz udział w ogromnych bitwach PVP i zagarnij dla siebie kawałek świata! To jest Albion Online.

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    Áudio do Carlinhos.

      Carlinhos copypasta
      Eu dou a bunda pra vários homens, chupo um monte de pinto, dou a bunda pros caras, eu vou bater o recorde mundial em dar a bunda. Eu sou um estuprado, eu sou um arrombado, eu dou a bunda para 2050 homens diferentes. Os cavalos comeram minha bunda, eu dei a bunda pros cavalos, os cavalos gozaram dentro da minha bunda. Eu dei a bunda para 2050 homens diferentes, 2050 homens diferentes comeram minha bunda e gozaram dentro. Eu dei a bunda para 2050 homens diferentes. Eu dei a bunda para 15 cavalos diferentes, 15 cavalos diferentes comeram minha bunda e gozaram dentro, 15 cavalos diferentes comeram minha bunda e gozaram dentro. Eu dei a bunda para 15 cavalos diferentes, 15 cavalos diferentes comeram minha bunda e gozaram dentro. Eu sou um arrombado, eu sou o cara mais arrombado do mundo, eu tenho a bunda arrombada de tanto dada, estou com a bunda comida. Eu tenho a bunda violentada, tenho a bunda rasgada, eu tenho a bunda comida por 2050 homens diferentes. Eu dou a bunda no meio da rua, dou a bunda no matagal, eu dou a bunda para vários homens no matagal, no matagal eu dou a bunda para 2050 homens diferentes, eu bati o recorde mundial em dar o CU. Eu sou um estuprado, eu gosto de ser estuprado, eu amo ser estuprado, eu AMO ser estuprado. Eu sou um estuprado, eu tenho a bunda arrombada, eu sou um estuprado. Eu estou oferecendo minha bunda para vários homens. Homens, vêm comer minha bunda, eu estou oferecendo minha bunda para vocês, homens. Homens, comam bastante minha bunda; gozem dentro de mim, homens. Homens, venham gozar dentro de mim, gozem a vontade dentro da minha bunda que eu gosto. Gozem dentro de mim, homens. Homens, venham gozar dentro da minha bunda, encham meu cu de esperma, homens. Homens, tô pedindo para vocês, venham comer minha bunda e gozar dentro. Fiquem à vontade, comam minha bunda e gozem bastante dentro. Homens. Homens comendo minha bunda e gozando dentro(3x). Eu dou a bunda. Eu dou a bunda para 2050 homens diferentes comerem e gozarem dentro. Eu bato recorde mundial em dar a bunda. Eu sou o cara que mais dá a bunda no mundo. Eu bato o recorde mundial em dar a bunda. Eu tenho a bunda comida, eu tenho a bunda deleitada, eu sou um arrombado. Eu dou o cu. Eu dou o cu no matagal. Eu dou o cu para um monte de homens, os homens comem à vontade meu cu e gozam dentro. Esperma dentro do meu cu. Cavalos comendo meu cu e gozando dentro, eu dou a bunda para os cavalos, eu dou a bunda para os cavalos. Os cavalos gozam dentro do meu cu. Os cavalos comem o meu cu e gozam dentro, os cavalos comem o meu cu e gozam dentro. Os homens comem o meu cu e gozam dentro. Eu dou a bunda, eu dou a bunda no meio do matagal, eu dou a bunda no meio do matagal para um monte de homens. Eu gosto de dar a bunda no meio do matagal, eu dou a bunda no meio do matagal para vários homens, eu tiro as calças no meio do matagal e dou a bunda para um monte de homens.

      Open English version

      I give ass to a lot of men, I suck a lot of dick, I give ass to guys, I'm going to break the world record for ass giving. I'm a rapist, I'm a break-in, I give ass to 2050 different men. The horses ate my ass, I gave the horses the ass, the horses came inside my ass. I gave ass to 2050 different men, 2050 different men ate my ass and cum inside. I gave ass to 2050 different men. I've fed my ass to 15 different horses, 15 different horses ate my ass and cum in it, 15 different horses ate my ass and cum in it. I've fed my ass to 15 different horses, 15 different horses ate my ass and cum inside. I'm a broken-in person, I'm the most broken-in guy in the world, my ass is broken from giving so much, my ass is fucked. I have my ass raped, I have my ass ripped, I have my ass fucked by 2050 different men. I give the ass in the middle of the street, I give the ass in the bushes, I give the ass to several men in the bushes, in the bushes I give the ass to 2050 different men, I beat the world record in giving the CU. I'm a rapist, I like being raped, I love being raped, I LOVE being raped. I'm raped, my ass is busted, I'm raped. I'm offering my ass to several men. Men, come eat my ass, I'm offering my ass to you men. Men, eat my ass a lot; come inside me men. Men, come and enjoy inside me, enjoy inside my ass that I like. Come inside me, men. Men, come cum inside my ass, fill my ass with cum, men. Men, I'm asking you, come eat my ass and cum inside. Feel free, eat my ass and enjoy a lot inside. Men. Men eating my ass and cumming inside (3x). I give the ass. I give ass to 2050 different men to eat and cum inside. I set a world record for giving ass. I'm the biggest ass guy in the world. I break the world record in giving ass. I have a fucked ass, I have a delighted ass, I'm a break-in. I give ass. I give my ass in the undergrowth. I give my ass to a lot of men, men eat my ass all they want and come inside. Sperm inside my ass. Horses eating my ass and cumming inside, I give the horses asses, I give the horses asses. Horses cum inside my asshole. Horses eat my ass and cum inside, horses eat my ass and cum inside. Men eat my ass and cum inside. I give the ass, I give the ass in the middle of the scrub, I give the ass in the middle of the scrub to a lot of men. I like to give my ass in the middle of the bushes, I give my ass in the middle of the bushes to several men, I take off my pants in the middle of the bushes and give my ass to a bunch of men.

      I think I rizzed too hard 😭😭😭😭

        I think I rizzed too hard 😭😭😭😭
        
        I slid into this femboys DMs by saying "Are you Mrs. Butterworth cuz you're hella sweet and you got that hourglass figure" and it went so well, and we had the common interest of playing guitar so I thought why not ask him "Do you wanna play guitar together? I could do the fingering then you could do the stroking." But now he's not responding 😭😭😭😭 He had told me he liked pistachio, so naturally I tried saving it by saying "Are you pistachio mochi? Cuz you look smooth, soft, and squishy, but sweet on the inside too," but he's still not responding 😭😭 Did I fumble? 😭 Did I rizz too hard? 😭

        To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Taylor Swift.

          Taylor Swift copypasta
          To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Taylor Swift. Her genius lyrics are extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of tayoretical physics most of the meanings will go over a typical listener’s head. There’s also Swifts’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into her characterisation- her personal philosophy draws heavily from Swiftie folk literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these lyrics, to realize that they’re not just meaningful- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Taylor truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the understanding in Taylor’s existential song catchphrase “Me-he-hee hoo-hoo-hoo” which itself is a cryptic reference to Taygenev’s Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Becky’s genius wit unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools. How I pity them.
          
          And yes, by the way, i DO have a Taylor tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the straight white guys’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid
          The original variation of the “To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ” was for Rick and Morty

          Oh my god it’s insane how unfunny you guys are

            Oh my god it’s insane how unfunny you guys are
            
            Like, all you guys do is spam the same phrases over and over again, it’s insane how unfunny that is, while you think it’s still funny! Let’s go through them all one-by-one
            
            Google en passant
            
            Where do I even begin with this god awful offense to humanity itself, we get it, funny pawn move, but how about you google how to get some bitches! Or maybe you should google how to get your father to come back with the milk, because that’s the only way I could ever dream of you idiots thinking this shit is so funny when it’s not, it’s as if you guys think you have the answer to life itself in the palm of your hand but it’s not, it’s just a dumb ass joke that’s been done a billion times
            
            Holy hell
            
            We get it, funny pawn move, haha, so funny, you googled lef en passant, funny funny! Not. I think you would need to have brain damage to think that any of this is worth any of your time, how about you actually do something with your life you worthless sons of bitches!
            
            New response just dropped
            
            No it fucking didn’t you moron! This is the trillionth time today that you’ve made this joke, and it was never funny, if the fucking black plague came back and started killing off the entire population of the earth, I would pray that you idiots would die first just so I don’t have to deal with all of this dumbass bullshit from you
            
            Actual zombie
            
            This one i actually don’t have any complaints about, because this perfectly describes all of you, you’re all just a bunch of mindless idiots doing the same thing over and over
            
            Call the exorcist
            
            Of course you need to call an exorcist! You should’ve called one to destroy the shit hole called anarchy chess! You guys think that you need an exorcist to get rid of the infection, but maybe what you really need to call is your father OH WAIT YOU CANT! And I count even blame him for wanting to leave such an idiot behind
            
            Bishop goes on vacation, never comes back
            
            What the fuck does this one even mean? Oh wait, nothing, just like the rest of this god forsaken joke, it doesn’t mean anything because for it to mean anything it would require a fucking brain, something you idiots clearly don’t have! Jesus Christ it’s hilarious how fucking stupid you all are
            
            Queen sacrifice anyone?
            
            At this point in the joke I’m pretty sure you’re just saying words to keep it going, it hasn’t been funny for ages at this point, but you idiots are like a fucking hydraulic press to a cows udder, trying to milk it for any tiny bit of validation this might give you, but by doing this, you must have not realized that you sacrificed you’re chance at a happy future, oh my fucking god, just like how your father sacrificed his marriage to get away from you
            
            Pawn storm incoming!
            
            At this point the joke has somehow devolved even further, from mindless stupidity to actually just retarded, I don’t even think you guys know what the fuck words mean anymore, how about you try to get a happy life incoming huh?
            
            And don’t even get me started on how much you guys love to say “en passant is forced, it’s time to brick your PIPI” as if that’s any funnier then anything else you’ve said before, and don’t even get me started on that dumbass copypasta
            
            Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off...
            
            Like, I don’t even think a fucking 5 year old would be dumb enough to think this is funny, I swear to god, if you idiots had anymore addiction to fucking stupid copypastas I would say you’re Italian! At least how to fucking spell before you try to be funny, holy shit it’s amazing how stupid you all are