Copypasta of a person’s past experience or events that is so absurd it became a meme of its own. Usually untrue stories that tries to circle jerk opinions.
I was just minding my business doing groceries as this high tier becky strolls in with her baby in tow. The toddler screams and screams and keeps screaming; I usually don't mind children but when they're loud as fuck and the parents do nothing it's annoying. So in passing I take a glance at the little shitlet and course it's a Chad. Blond, blue-eyed, straight hairline, hunter eyes, slim cheeks, pronounced jaw. No sign of the normal puffy cheeks, giant forehead and bug eyes you usually see in babies. In short, an Aryan Gigachad in the making :feelsree::feelsree::feelsree:
In that moment the rage I felt was insurmountable. How dare this genetically privileged little shitter inconvenience all us subhumans like that? He will already be king of the world when he grows up, can he not at least feel a little bad for his inferiors and shut the fuck up? But no of course he can't since he's a baby and doesn't even understand what a mogger he is. The world is unfair, this little Chad was born a winner while I was born a loser :feelsrope:
I have a buddy who's a big N4Y fan and an avid record collector. He posts all his finds on instagram. I thought it'd be funny to anonymously mail him a copy of Mambo #5. Tracked down a radio promo copy with a bunch of different versions of the song. Sent it out and never heard anything. About a year later I asked him about it. He got super upset and yelled "That was you? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Its a bad song but that seemed like an extreme response. Turned out someone took a diarrhea shit into the postal box I dropped the package in. USPS just bagged it up in a plastic bag and still delivered it.
Its from curatedtumblr comments but the source has never been found.
"Yo, are these catboys straight?" I mutter to my buddy while uncomfortably adjusting my position on the bench.
"No, of course not." my buddy, Josh, responds with out looking at me, a confused sneer frozen on his face as he watches the baseball team full of catboys roll around on the grass and pounce on each other before bumbling the ball back to the skinny, scared pitcher. He hisses as he picks up the ball as if it's the first time he's had to throw one even though this game has been going on for 3 hours already.
"I don't know." I squirm, "I mean, I... well. I mean I think they could... they could be straight, ya know?"
"Definitely not, man. They're pouncing on each other and hugging each other and licking each other. These dudes are super gay." Josh throws his head back and looks up to the darkening sky. "I was supposed to leave 20 minutes ago."
He has some obligation with his girlfriend no doubt. "Well, ya know. Cats are gay. So maybe you're confusing these catboys with real cats when in fact they're only catboys."
"Nope."
Our batter who's up at the plate backs off and sighs heavily. He slings his bat over his shoulder and calls over to us. "Guys. We just gotta call it. We gotta forfeit."
The pitcher's mound turns into a catboy pile as all the catboys do that thing where cats arch their backs and rub against each other. Some how from this writhing purr pile, the ball launches towards our unprepared batter for another strike, his third. In resigned disbelief, he trudges back to the dugout and sits down on the bench.
"I can't believe it." the out-batter says.
Josh on the bench throws his hat to the ground. "We can't quit, dammit! We can't lose to these fucking catboys!" There's a quaver in his frustrated voice. I think he doesn't understand why exactly he's so upset to be losing to the catboys. Neither do I. I can't understand my feelings towards the catboys either.
Head in his hands, shaking his head, he continues, "These fucking catboys..."
I clear my throat to get his attention and then grab his shoulder. "Yeah, these fucking catboys. Look. The catboys are fucking."
At the pitcher's mound, the purr pile has turned into a fuck pile. The catboys have stripped themselves of their little baseball uniforms and all their lithe, pallid bodies are writhing and grinding together. The meows and hisses and screeches are almost unbearable. Almost...
One of our teammates stands up and walks right on past, present, and future by us, unbuttoning his shirt.
"Jesse? No, man. Don't do it. If they fuck long enough, that's gotta be a forfeit. We can still win this thing."
"S-sorry..." Jesse says. He makes a sound like he was going to say something else, like he was about to justify what he's about to do, but no. He simply strips naked and hops in the cat pile to a chorus of cheerful meows. They welcome him greedily.
I'm drenched in sweat, heart pounding. I feel like I have a fluffy tail curled up in my getting-tighter-by-the-moment pants.
"Josh, I uhh..." I don't want to let him down. I don't want to let the team down, but... It's a fur fuck pile.
Josh sighs, "Just fucking go fuck with the catboys... I'll be there in a minute... I just gotta call my girlfriend and tell her I'll be late..." he says while untying his cleats.
I'm relieved and ashamed, but excited as I hurriedly wrench loose my sweaty uniform. As I stumble in a lustful stupor, practicing my own meow, I hear Josh muttering to himself.
"These fucking catboys got us again."
Its a post on Tumblr by @henstomper in 2022 which became meme. The pasta is usually used alongside the first one.
the catboys i signed for my all-catboy baseball team dont know what baseball is and theyre actively loudly sobbing whenever they miss a swing and whenever they dive to catch a ball it bonks them on the head and they go "uweh" and our pitcher closes his eyes whenever he throws because hes scared and we're beating every other team in the league
Its a joke on Nintendo since they have a reputation on shutting down anything infringing on their IP. The story started from FB as a meme but is partially true on a kid that created a Switch with carboard.
a young boy from Thailand dreamed about having a Nintendo switch. Due to not having good financial conditions, he fabricated his own using cardboard and markers. His father, moved, filmed him and posted the video on social media. After going viral, it got to the eyes of Nintendo's CEO, who went to Thailand personally and sued the boy for 2.5 million dollars for copyright infringement.
Its a copypasta joke that the sitcom Big Bang Theory is actually unfunny and people would only laugh because it has laugh track. Its unclear where it originally came from but the earliest dates back in 2018 from Reddit.
"I've never been a fan of Internet Explorer"
Crowd laughs nervously and a few grunts are heard from the back seats as people edge closer to hear the punchline.
"Why not? Don't you like the internet?"
The crowd suddenly stands up, aware that they are about to receive what they came for. People slowly edge closer to the set as Sheldon prepares for his next line. Sweat is clearly visible on his brow and his mouth is quivering in anticipation as he readies himself for what is about to happen.
"I just prefer Firefox because, like the fox, I am cunning and nimble."
The crowd suddenly surges forward as the words escape Sheldon's mouth. They are so powerful, they almost shake the very foundations of the CBS studios. He watches as, in what he perceives as slow motion, the crowd moves toward his fragile body. He has been preparing for this moment his whole life. This is his moment. This is his Emmy. This is his Golden Globe. This is even his Oscar. The crowd converges around him so quickly they ignore the trampled cries of Leonard and Penny, who now lie shaking on the floor, their bones crushed by the sheer mass of the crowd. Sheldon stares back at the eyes around him. What he sees are no longer people. What he sees is the human psyche stripped down to its core. Their lives, what they were before this moment has been forgotten. Ravenous. Hungry. They want one thing from him. Sheldon closes his eyes, clears his mind and relaxes his body. What happens next depends completely on the next few seconds. The time between this and what he mutters next feels like an eternity. Slowly, he opens his eyes. He looks at Leonard, then at Penny, both lying lifeless on the floor. Without a second thought, he says with resounding conviction...
"BAZINGA"
In a split second, the crowd pounces on his ready and waiting body. Man, woman, child all at once. Sheldon cries out in complete ecstasy as they consume his flesh. He stops suddenly, as he drifts into eternal slumber. Peace at last.
i grew up watching cartoons in french and i remember trying to make friends in school asking everyone "yall watch bob l'eponge" omg they bullied me so hard
