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Storytime

Copypasta of a person’s past experience or events that is so absurd it became a meme of its own. Usually untrue stories that tries to circle jerk opinions.


Roblox Down

    Roblox has been down for more than 24 hours now and the official channels have not yet confirmed when is Roblox coming back online.
    It's been 20 hours without Roblox, I can’t stop shaking and I’m having severe withdrawals. I woke up today trying to log onto Roblox but the site was down, I had a major panic attack but managed to calm down after a few hours. I couldn’t go to school today, and I can barely get out of my bed to do anything. I’m sick to my stomach at this point, life is worthless.
    21 Hour of roblox being down. I think i'm losing my mind. My whole body aches and my limbs are trembling. I feel my bones breaking and i'm in a straight panic attack because i have to go see the scary outside world and the tall green grass. I feel my organs degenerate and i'm losing power. Please, Roblox CEO, put your game back up. I'm dying and in endless eternal pain. I don't think i'm going to make it. How many years?…. Months even has it been without roblox? I still can’t comprehend my only reason of life has been stripped away from me, my body has gone into withdrawal, my hands are currently shaking as I am currently typing this. My brain has no purpose other than to fulfill the duty of playing roblox. What do i do now? I see no purpose of life… There is no purpose of life. I am going to send one final message before I cease to exist. I’m feeling sick to my stomach, my body is sick, my legs are shaking. I’m about to throw up. This is a disease, a mental disorder and disease that has taken my life away, Hope you’re happy now… roblox.
    It's been 24 hours without Roblox. I can't go ahead with this any longer. My mental state is in complete and utter pandemonium. I cried myself to sleep 4 times today. I feel paranoid that Roblox may never come back. Roblox has the only thing that brings me joy in this cruel life for 7 years now and I won't be able to recover mentally or financially if it's gone. I've spent over $7,000 on Roblox this week alone. I even bought $500 worth of Roblox stocks because I trust Roblox. I told my mom through tears and she yelled at me calling me a "failure" and saying she knew she should have been on birth control. Although, Roblox being down has had it's positive impacts on me. My IQ has increased by 40 and I've been thinking more critically. When I saw the "We're making things more awesome. Be back soon" page, I vomited. I just hope they mean it when they say soon. I even started praying again. I've been a dedicated Christian for 12 years and I began to pray to god in hopes that they can bring Roblox back soon. I had to learn Arabic to pray to Allah. I hope Roblox comes back soon I don't know how much longer I can take this.

    Roblox has taken over my sons life

      Roblox is an online game platform and game creation system
      Roblox has taken over my sons life, I need someone here to help me, it started off pretty small, he told me he was into this game called Roblox. I looked it over, seemed nice. That was 5 years ago, now my son has locked himself inside his room, using a pile of roblox toy plastic to guard me from opening it. When he comes out (The 1 time he does a week) he carries 5 bottles of empty soda pop filled with human waste and empty bags of food and throws them away. He will not speak to me, and will not leave the house, only will play Roblox. I've tried it all, but he seems to find a way to play roblox. I tired killing the WiFi but he payed someone in robux to let him have his, so he has his own wifi source, and trying to take away his PC causes him to go into a fit of terror, where he'll scream "ROBLOX ESCAPE THE BOSSBABY RAINBOW OBBY FIGDET SPINNER" until he gets it back please someone tell me how I stop this. I've tried doing a thing I call "Good Robloxian Robux" where I give him Robux when he does good things, like come out of his room, or doesn't use more then 20+ hours of wifi a day but it only works so much please someone tell me how I can get my son back, I miss that boy, he's 25 now, and needs a job

      I installed Linux

        I installed Linux and the feeling of freedom and privacy hit me so hard that I immediately began committing crimes, knowing that the FBI could never track me. Piracy, sexual assault, trademark infringement, petty larceny, tax fraud, you name it. I also own several fully automatic firearms even though I live in the state of California, but it doesn't matter. Ever since I removed Windows 10 from my computer and replaced it with Arch Linux, and began using a PinePhone as my daily driver phone, police can't even stop me in traffic. Windows may have a lot of video games, but the benefits of Linux should not be understated.

        17 days without jerking off

          What no fapping would do to ya
          17 days without jerking off, I entered the pharmacy to buy a candy(dont ask me why), then the girl spoke like this "good night, can I help?" Man who says that? Everyone knows that these girls only say "good night / good day / good afternoon" but for me she said "good night, I can help", naughty she is super flirting me. I caught a red candy and said "I want a strawberry candy" then she said "this is cherry, the strawberry is the most rosy" look how naughty, man, unbelievable, the mine had the audacity to say that the Red candy is not strawberry just to pull a subject with me, I decided to see how much she wanted that dick, so I said "ah it's all the same" then she giggled. Man was not a joke, there was no reason for her to laugh, she laughed to leave me at ease and ask for my number, I'm sure. So I kept looking at her shut up for about 40 seconds to make a link in the flirting because it was not fair just to do everything, she asking "is ... Do you want anything else sir?" Look how naughty offering to me at work, so I just stayed with the candy in the hand looking at her, she started looking at the sides to see if anyone was looking at her to ask for my number, she was so euphoric with my presence That was beginning to sweat and fill the eyes of water, surely imagining our future married. Two minutes after I only hold the candy and look into her eyes I put my hand in the pocket to get the wallet and she said "please do not hurt me", certainly imagining a wild sex because I'm this alpha male that I am. Then I took the wallet, opened a smile, picked up 1 dollar and paid for the candy. Then I said "I'll be back" and a tear came down her face. Certainly she is completely in love with me and crying with happiness.

          Nikocado Avocado fucking dies

            Nikocado Avocado is a YouTuber known for his dramatic and comedic performances during mukbang videos.
            Nick opened his 24th packet of noodles. Another day of mukbanging ahead. He opened the camera, but he didn't say anything. He felt weak...he was sweating...Orlin was gone...he got tired of being pushed around. It took a toll on him...despite the way they acted they still loved eachother. With each passing bite, his stomach pain increased. He began to cry. In a split moment of clarity, he seemed to hear himself play the violin. He took another bite. The life he chose was irreversible for him ...he just had to take another bite. Suddenly, a sharp pain gets him to scream. He drops from the chair...sweating and coughing , the camera shakes and falls on the table. He can't get up. He knows he won't get up. In agony , he is no longer in that room. He is in a garden, dressed in white. His body felt so light...in the distance, a boy plays violin. He is skinny, healthy, dressed just in white, playing the violin. Tears roll in his eyes. But they are tears of joy. He gets closer to the boy...and, he sees his own face.. just 4 years ago...he follows the boy and then all of a sudden, the light gets brighter and brighter. He is no more. He had become one with the air, the earth ,the flowers.

            People With Big Penises Should Be Executed

              pparchy
              Yesterday I was in a daze. I had gotten into a heated argument on Reddit on whether or not r/averageredditor is filled with the same kinds of people it claims to detest. I thought I had thoroughly defeated my opponent's reasoning, but then he told me he'd fuck my mom. But when he did, I found out the hard way that his penis was so long and hard that when he put it all inside, it caused my mom's innards to be pierced by his mammoth dong. Blood and cum came all out of her vagina. The guy with the big penis came out unscathed, even though I saw shit going into his urethra. Sadly though, my mom died. RIP.

Today I was trying to overcome this great trauma by fapping to rule 34. However, a teenage fuck, also with a massive dong, thought it would be funny if he aimed his ejaculated at me through my window. However, his aim was off. But not in a good way. His cum managed to go inside of my PC case and cause it to die. My 3000tb porn collection was now completely gone. But, when I tried to do the same thing to the guy who destroyed my PC, my wimpy cock couldn't even let out one good drop of jizz.


Big penises oppress. My aunt died after deepthroating a ginormous pp. Jocks slapped me in high school with penises I could never even hope to have just to spite me. Fuck the dongicracy. Fuck the pparchy. I want these fuckers to get a taste of their own medicine, and die deepthroating the biggest dong of them all, my anime waifu's giant futa cock.