Copypasta of a person’s past experience or events that is so absurd it became a meme of its own. Usually untrue stories that tries to circle jerk opinions.
I'm a 24 year old guy who because of an accident as a child, I literally broke my penis. I went all my teens not knowing what an erection feels like or what it's like to be able to perform and no one knows that the reason I've been working since I was 14 is because I had a goal in mind: getting that damm implant.
now, having had my first sexual experience ever in my life, I felt this sense of anger just go off my mind. I hated the topic of sex because I knew I was disbanded from enjoying it, now I can get hard so easy and ironically I have a form of switch and kill switch, I just turn it on and off when I want to. It's creepy I know but trust me I feel like ''robocock''
Does it get soft? nope, I can now pound FOREVER and the though if that itself has revived some sense of self worth that I have never felt before, I'm not even scared to talk to girls now because I'm aware that I have a modified penis with perks and attachments.
People ask me why I'm happy now and not all negative and depressed but I can't tell them because it's awkward and people my age wouldn't understand the pain and sacrifice, I just want to enjoy this victory in anonymity.
My boy, my oldest child, was so good when he was little, but something broke inside of him when he was a teenager.
My wife and I always accepted, loved, and encouraged him. We pushed him to work hard and treat people with respect. I don’t know where exactly we failed him but as a father I feel responsible for the thing he’s turned into.
It started when he was 14. He had began to become withdrawn and emotional. We chalked it up to teenaged mood swings. For some reason he was just so angsty and bitter all the time. We were worried about his lack of social life and his over-reliance on his computer. He kind of hid himself in the online world so my wife and I began to limit his computer time, but he simply became more aggressive and confrontational.
His hygiene was bad, and he was always confrontational when we told him to shower or do laundry. His room stank horribly and we eventually had a huge fight over it where he physically shoved my wife and called her a bitch, and eventually we got him to at least clean and air out his room regularly on the grounds that it was our house and if he couldn’t maintain his space he wouldn’t be entitled to it - essentially we got to the point where we told him he wouldn’t be allowed his worldly possessions or privacy unless he took care of the space we all shared. the room still smelled and he was still rude about cleaning it but we could tell him to get it clean and he would do it after that.
We ended up getting a call from his school saying that a female student felt harassed by him. We were shown messages where he continually badgered her to have sex with him, threatened to “punish” her for stringing him along, sending her unsolicited nudes, telling her some violent fantasies of his, and eventually just descending into some horrid rage-filled rant about how she is just another “whore” and other things.
We were shocked. We explained to him why this behaviour was unacceptable, and I explained to him that it was ok to be sexually active but his actions were toxic and abusive.
I tried mentoring him man-to-man, taking him on camping trips and whatnot and talking to him about women and girls and trying to give him advice. I suggested he try showering, changing up his hair and facial hair styles, trying out different fashion styles, maybe going to the gym.
I told him some hard truths - that he doesn’t want a gross woman so he shouldn’t be a gross man. By gross I mean hygiene and looks. I explained to him that good looks are more hygiene and self care than genetics but he refused to accept what I said to him.
After that I caught him sniffing his sister’s panties in the laundry room - she was 12 at the time and he was 17. He assured me it had nothing to do with his sister, he said he just had a panty sniffing fetish and he pretended they belonged to girls from porno videos, but still I gave him hell for it, and he was grounded and lost his computer for 6 months. I went through his computer and I was disgusted by the kinds of hateful, racist, incel forums he frequented, the horrid things he said about women, and his save file was full of cartoon porn with girls of questionable ages. I wiped the hard drive completely and began strictly monitoring his online activity. I used parental filters to block incel sites and and porn sites that hosted cartoon porn.
The next big issue was something he did to my daughter’s friend. My daughter is 5 years his junior, and one day after a sleepover, my daughter came to me and said her friend wanted to tell me something but was afraid of what I would say.
My son cornered this 13 year old girl and physically blocked her path and touched her hair and face while making very inappropriate comments about her body and asking her if she liked to sleep naked and what kind of underwear she wore.
I tore into my son for that, my wife and I both shouted at him, and told him his behaviour was horrible and I told him then that if his actions got him arrested I would not defend him. He accused us of not loving him, but I told him the reason I was so passionately angry in that situation is because I do love him, and I want to help him become a good man so he can stop being so predatory and bitter and miserable. I told him some hard truths. That he did this all to himself and that he is the only one he can blame for how bitter he is.
I suggested he look to women his own age and he went on a rant about how it was a waste of time because women were already whores (and his definition of a whore is a woman who has had sex even just once) by 17. I called him out on his bullshit and expressed clearly that if he harassed young girls anymore I would personally turn him in.
I invited my daughters friend over after and I personally apologized to her for her experiences, I cried in shame for my son’s behaviour and begged her forgiveness for allowing her to feel unsafe in my home and promised her that if she ever felt uncomfortable she could come to my wife and I and we would always believe and help her. Luckily, my daughter didn’t lose this friend, but for safety I installed a lock on my daughter’s door.
We got my son therapy but he refused to engage with the therapist, calling him a “sand nigger” and “pajeet” and “terrorist”. His next therapist was a “chad”, so he didn’t relate to that either.
We fought about him not trying, not getting a job, and he said he couldn’t get one because of the immigrants, to which I pointed out that he was struggling because he got fired from his high school jobs for being lazy.
After those fights, my wife tried to empathize with him and understand what made him so bitter but he flipped out at her, and called her a cock-gargling whore and said that she fucked her way through dozens of men until she found a “beta-fag” who was willing to shelter her for missionary sex.
My wife, who works and contributes to the family income, who is an independent, professional woman.
Honestly, I lost it more than ever before. I had never been so angry when I heard what he said. That may be his mom, he may be my son, but the woman he was abusively tearing into is my god damn wife. No one can treat my wife like that.
I am ashamed to say in my anger, he shoved me and I physically retaliated, shoving him back, and pinning him against the wall. I felt ashamed of myself, I have never been an angry or violent person, but I couldn’t control myself. I’ve never put my hands on either of my children in such a way in my life, I hate child abusers... but this boy was no child. He was a grown man.
He was intimidated and backed down, and for a while he was peaceful.
The last straw was this week.
My daughter has dated 3 people her whole life. A boy, a girl, and now another boy. We were as open about sex with my daughter as we were with my son. We asked if she would like to have a question-free steady supply of condoms left in her bathroom drawer, and if she wanted to get on birth control. She said no to both questions with her first boyfriend. She never really brought him home but we met him at one of her recitals. When she had a girlfriend she went over to her house all the time, and didn’t want to bring her to the same house her brother lived in, a sentiment I understood.
But her most recent boyfriend has a lot going on behind the scenes in his family. He’s a nice boy but his mom is a single mom of 4 and they struggle.
This boy started coming around a month after they got together. I like him. My daughter is happy with him. He treats her with respect. He is an intelligent boy. He’s an absolute gentleman. He’s respectful and polite in our home. He calls me sir, calls my wife Ma’am, he offers to help with the cooking or dishes or cleaning while he’s visiting, he talks to us, he’s a bit of an amateur cook himself and brings us food all the time to say thank you for taking care of him, when we go out for dinner he always offers to pay for himself and my daughter (though I know he doesn’t have much money so I always pay). When getting out of the car he opens the door for my wife and offers her his hand (he sits behind her for leg room). He holds the doors, when we leave somewhere he helps my daughter put her jacket on like those sweet old fashioned couples.
This young man works hard, and gives what little he has to his mom and siblings. Like I said, I really respect the boy. I offered him money once for groceries for his family but he turns me down and says he would feel guilty accepting my money like that. He’s appreciative of things - in the winter, it was -20 and he had only a hoodie, so I draped my jacket over his arms, and I said “take it son, it’s cold.” He had tears in his eyes as he said thank you, and I made some excuse about wanting to get rid of the jacket and told him he could keep it if he brought cookies for us next time he visited.
When Christmas came along, I invited him over for supper, and when I went to pick him up I delivered some presents for his family, and on the ride back to my house we had a moment. He was crying because he didn’t have much to give us - he got everyone in our house a present but he cried anyways because he felt it wasn’t enough to make up for what we gave him. I pulled over, and I just hugged him, and I said to him that it wasn’t the value of what he got, it was that he got us anything at all. I thanked him for treating my daughter so well, and I told him he would always be welcome in my home.
My own son didn’t get us anything for christmas, not even a card bought with the money we give him. This boy got my wife and I matching wine glasses since we like to share a bottle every now and then.
My son didn’t eat with us. He pillaged the food table and ran away to his room alone while my daughter’s boyfriend met my sister and her family and my parents and my uncle. They all told me how charming he was and how polite he was. Meanwhile after dinner my son told my 5 year old nephew “fuck off Faggot” for asking to play a game with him. A man over 20 years old.
Last week, my wife and I went out for an evening to ourselves. We went to dinner, then we went to an upscale bar to play some pool, then we went home.
When I walked in the door, the kids were screaming at each other. I came in to see my son and my daughter’s boyfriend fighting. The boyfriend was just pushing my son back and trying to redirect him, my son was throwing punches and charging him. My daughter was crying and sitting against the wall clutching her face. I got between them and pushed them apart, and demanded to know what was happening.
My son went on a tirade about how he found birth control pills and heard “whore” sounds from her room, so he kicked open her door and discovered them having sex, he said he couldn’t believe his own sister would “be a nigger’s whore” and called the poor boy a monkey and other things.
My wife got my daughter and her boyfriend out of there and I yelled at my son for how he was acting. Eventually I got nowhere with him so I made him wait in his room. I went to talk to my daughter. I apologized to her boyfriend, crying as I did, telling him that I hope he could forgive me for letting this happen. He said he was sorry for getting violent but that he only did it because my son hit her. My daughter cried and said he was a psycho and threatened to rape her, and that he admitted to ejaculating on her toothbrush and hair brush.
I charged into his room, and I said firmly that he should pack his bags and leave. I told him I would pay to have his things sent to him, wherever he went, but that he was leaving tomorrow.
My wife stayed at my sisters, and my daughter and her boyfriend spent the next few nights at his place.
The next day I practically threw my son out of the house kicking and screaming.
I took his key back and changed the alarm codes and garage door code. A day later I had a message requesting some of this things - mostly his gaming stuff - be delivered to some strange apartment block I didn’t recognize a couple of towns over. A college aged man buzzed me in and I delivered the stuff. I didn’t see my son.
My wife and I then went through his room. My daughter’s boyfriend came over and helped me move his furniture to the garage. We threw out his mattress and some other more gross and smelly things, and we took out the carpet to be replaced.
Hidden in the closet was a treasure trove of my daughter’s underwear, so saturated with old, moldy semen that they were as hard as bricks. The unnerving part was that there were a few pairs my daughter was adamant didn’t belong to her. And they were too small for my wife. It was possible he stole them from my nieces.
There was a sketchbook containing graphic drawings of my son violently raping different women and keeping little girls chained up in some kind of sex dungeon. I went through his old phone that was still working, and all his photos were screenshots of my nieces and their friends in their bikinis, lots of cartoon porn, lots of red pill and incel and Trump memes. He still had messenger, so I checked his messages, most of them were just him trying to harass women and underaged girls.
I checked his Email and... much to my disgust, he stole private photos of my wife from her phone, and he was selling them.
Today, I went to the police with everything and told them everything.
I gave my baby boy everything... I don’t know why he went down this road. But I’m just so sorry I failed him. I don’t know what the police will do... but I hope they stop him before he hurts someone else.
The sad thing is... yesterday, once it was all over and settled, yesterday we had a wonderful day. One of the happiest we have ever had.
It's awful. My dick is so large I just cannot lug it around any longer. It is so insanely huge and has caused so many problems in my life. I cannot go to airports as they think I am sneaking something in. so everytime I go, I get groped as they try to take my penis off thinking its a bomb. I cannot pleasure women as they are so horrified at the sight of my cock, that they immediately run away. My mother and father disowned me after seeing the length of my shaft. Not only is it extraordinarily long, it is just too thick. I cannot sexually relieve myself as my hands are just too small to masturbate.
My humongous cock has ruined my life. I resent God for cursing me with this large chunk of meat that just drags across the ground. Doctors tell my I will never be able to get a penis reduction as they would have nowhere to put the penis. It would just take up far too much room.
I had a girlfriend when I was a young lad, she loved me for who I was and did not care for this deformity, but one day... I took off my jeans and my penis flung out, smacking her and flinging her out the window. She died 2 hours later in the hospital. She was the only woman who ever loved me. My penis is just... too ginormous. It has caused problems for myself and the people around me. For this reason, I will be ending it all. My penis has taken over my life... but it cannot take over a life that does not exist.
Finally caught my GF pooping!
she always hide it by pretending like she doesn't, which I find sus. Once when we spent the entire weekend together I almost caught her but she had locked the bathroom door and by the time I got in she had flushed and was like "oh hey what's up?" pretending like nothing happened, although there was an OBVIOUS lingering odor. Anyway, this time I was prepared, sprung the lock and burst in on her mid-wipe. She frantically tried to spin & flush but I smacked her hand away and pushed her off the toilet to get a better look in (it was a goddamn big dump ). Caught red handed, I pointed my finger at her and said I FUCKING KNEW IT! Initially she tried to blame my cat but eventually admitted defeat.
I'm just happy I dumped her and now I am gonna find a GF who does not poop.
Caught my gf pooping…so I broke up with her. 😡 She said shes off to pee while were watching a movie, now shes been gone 5 minutes and i knew something was up, i knocked on the door and asked if everything is ok, she said yes she'll be right out…her voice was labored and i became suspicious…so i yelled "IM COMING IN!' she screamed no but there was no stopping this, i smashed through the door and i see her sitting on the toilet seat, i told her to get the fuk up, she didnt so i threw her off, i looked inside the toilet…just as i suspected, a goddam log, bitch u better pray this isnt yours. i looked around and saw no pet in site, I KNOW THIS IS UR POOP U WHORE, she screamed at me that im crazy and that shes calling the cops, all the while toilet paper in her hands. i told her no need to call the cops, im breaking up with u u some kinda poop whore. and that was that. I feel like a new man and off to find a woman who doesnt poop. 👌 Real men don’t settle for less…
be me
be sophomore in college
spring break
decide to go to San Francisco with a few of my bros >I had this one buddy, we'll call him Dave
Dave was a fucking wildcard, this dude would do just about anything for a laugh >In San Francisco after an awful red-eye flight.
Go clubbing every night, having the time of our lives
Eventually our trip was coming to a close, and we only had a couple more days left in San Fran >Decide to go clubbing again, for the third night in a row
After a few hours of clubbing we were pretty freaking inebriated >Finally decide to wander back to our hotel for the night
Begin to stumble back to the hotel, having a great fucking time
We are suddenly approached by one a San Fran's finest, a frighteningly emaciated meth addict hooker. >We are not interested in acquiring vanareal diseases from a crack whore, continue to walk
As we were about to walk by, this hooker said something that I'll never be able to forget >"I'll bet each of you boys ten dollars that you can't shit on my face"
Dave immediately takes her up on the offer, me and the rest of my friends are too drunk to care >Hooker takes us all down to an alley, then proceeds to lay down with her face upwards
"Okay try to shit on my face"
Dave goes first.
Dave pulls his pants down and exposes his bare ass >Just as he's about to pinch a log off onto this meth addict whore's forehead, she blows on his asshole
Asshole immediately shrivels up like a dehydrated raisin, Dave literally can not shit on her face
My turn next
I stand over her face, knowing that my ten dollars is at stake >I squeeze my bowels like I've never squeezed them before, and I begin to feel a massive shit log stirring within me
I had gained confidence, this was my shining moment >Just as I felt the tip of my shit touching the ring on my asshole, a great wind swept up from the prostitute's mouth and instantly closed the gates of my sphincter
Just as Dave had failed before me, I was unnsuccessful in my quest >Hooker proceeds to do the same to each of my friends, not a single one of us can shit on her face
Hooker collects sixty bucks, and we finish our joumey back to the hotel defeated >All of my friends and I quickly forget the experience, except for Dave
Dave becomes legitimately angy that he wasn't able to shit on the hooker's face >Keeps talking about how much he wants his money back
whatever.gif
Next day
Our plane leaves the next moming, so this night was our last in San Francisco >We decide to go around and eat dinner at the cheapest restaurant we can find (after losing our money to the hooker, we decided not to spend much)
Find this nasty "chinese" buffet
Eat a fuckton of food, tons of really spicy stuff
cont
Decide to go back to the hotel to chill and start packing
We get back to the Hotel, and a look of pure malice crosses Dave's face
"We're going to get our money back"
Apparently the chinese buffet was beginning to have a serious affect on Dave
Dave runs out of the hotel to go find the hooker from the night before
Friends and I have no choice but to follow
Dave doubles over in stomach pain, still running with the feriocity and determination of a tigress hunting her prey >Dave begins to groan and fart loadly, running even faster than before
Finally arrive at the alley where we met the hooker before
Sure enough, the same meth head prostitute is stading at the same comer
Dave groans through clenched teeth "We want to try and shit on your face again, double or nothing"
Hooker agrees
Takes us back to the same place as before, and lays in the same position >Dave stands over her face as I remain transfixed with anticipation
Before the hooker even had time to purse her lips in preparation of closing Dave's sphincter, he began to release an unholy anal terror the likes of which no man should ever witness
Dave lets out a defeaning warcry as legions of liquid shit spew forth from between his fiercly vibrating asscheeks >The hooker's screams of utter terror slowly become muffled as legendary proportions of post-digested spicy asian buffet cover her face and chest
The shit continues to flow forth as the floodgates of hell remain open >Hooker attempts to protect her already scat-buried face with her hands, which are quickly pushed back by the force of Dave's anal explosion
Finally, Dave's ass slowly putters and flarps itself to sleep >Dave turns around, bare ass quivering from the after affects of what can only be compared to a nuclear blast in order to assess the damage
The Hooker is literally covered from head to toe in shit, with a smell reminiscient of the prison cells in Auschwitz >She's not even moving anymore, she just lays still put into shock by the force of Dave's shit
Dave turns to us with a serious expression on his face,bare ass still exposed to the breeze
"Holy fuck I've killed her" >The pavement around the hookers head is also drenched in shit, giving the appearence of a grotesque brown halo
Dave quickly pulls his pants back up, and we all sprint away from the alley > Still don't know what happened to that hooker, or if she even survived
You all might wonder why it took me so long to start masturbating, it is because I didn't even know what masturbation is and how it feels when I was in pre-puberty. No one talked to me about it. I think I was pretty lucky because my life would have been ruined if I started masturbation at an early age. As of now, I am studying computer science at one of the top five universities in my country. I am successful to an extent. Now getting to the point.........
I read many confessions on how people are seeking help to stop masturbating, telling how they regret doing it, how it physically weakens them, etc. and I thought I was lucky to not get addicted to this. I was happy and all and also when my friends ask me if I ever masturbated, I would proudly say no, for which they start to suspect me that I was lying which indeed I was not. I in return asked them if they ever did that, and the response was pretty much expected.
Everything was going well, but today, I wanted to experience masturbation and how having an orgasm feels. Right after my mom left to get groceries, I locked the main door and headed to my room, and pulled my pants down. I started playing porn (yes, I watch porn but never masturbated to it) and was about to hold my penis to jerk it. I felt that this would make more sense to do it in the bathroom so I can clean it all up after I ejaculate. I headed to the bathroom, pulled my pants down, held my penis with my left hand and my phone in my right hand, and started to jerk it. I felt a little uncomfortable while doing it, and found out I was doing it with the wrong hand. I quickly closed porn, headed to the wash basin, and washed my left hand. I again headed to my room and started jerking it with my right hand but it wasn't erect. I switched videos but it still didn't work. Lastly, I played a lesbian seduction video and I started jerking off with my right hand. I didn't feel anything yet, I thought I was doing it wrong. I then got forcibly aroused, made my penis forcibly erect, and started jerking off. It worked, I started to feel something. I think this is what an orgasm feels like. It felt so good. It then felt like I have to ejaculate and I brought my penis near to the potty pot (I don't know what it's called) and ejaculated like 3 or 4 translucent thick white drops. I wanted to jerk it off but it felt like a pleasure-pain. I stopped there and cleaned my hands, my penis tip, and my bathroom and headed out. I might want to do it later but I should also need some privacy. I might not do it for a long time because I have to return to my college as it reopens this month end.
I would like my fellow teenagers to comment on this, every comment shall be taken constructively. I might be the oldest teenager but I don't think I have any good experience with things as most of you do. I am the kind of person who waits for the first kiss till marriage and has no plans to hook up in the meantime.