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Emojipasta

A block of text that has been “emojified” meaning that it now contains an absurd number of emojis in them. An attempt to ridicule the use of emojis in text.

NYC air quality alert

    What’s ❔❓🤔 that smell? 👃 Is that 😐🤔 your ⚠️ pussy 😼 on 🔛 fire? 🔥 No 👨‍🦰🙅it’s the air 💨 quality. 👌 That’s 🎊 right ➡️ folks, 👥 there’s 🛒 some 🐺💯 burning 💨in 😩 the northern 🔝border 🇺🇸😎 and it’s not 😣 from 👉👊 a fat 🍑ass 💋😂 blunt. 🍃🚬 Those 🇨🇦Canadians have 😤 gotten 🙏 a little ▪️too 😢 careless and now ✊😱 us 👨 AMERICANS 🇺🇸 have to suffer. 😭 It’s time 🕓 to storm 🌙 the northern ❄️🥶🤧border 🇺🇸😎 this year 🎆 instead 🚔 of the capitol. 🏛️ Be 🤰 sure 🙅 to grab 👐👊 your 💦🚪 free 💜 masks 😷 (NOT ❌ FOR 💰😙 COVID 🦠🦠 I 😡 REPEAT 🔁 NOT 🚫 FOR 🔄COVID) 🦠🦠 and pray 🙏 you 🤕🔥 make 😼😼😼😼😼 it to your 👈🏼 metro 🚇 stop. 🛑 Send 📩 this to 1 👊 friend 😎👬 and you 👈 won’t 😌 get 😩 a collapse 💨lung. Send 📨📧 this to 5 🎉😂 friends 😷 and you ☑️🕝 will 😜⚽ get a bonus 5 🔳 feet 👣 of visibility 👀. Send ✉️✉️✉️ this to 10 🕑 friends 👬 and Biden 👨‍🦳👤 will 💀 use 😏 the smoke 🚬 haze for 4️⃣ a cool 😎 ass 😐 rave party 🥳 on 🔛 the national 😝 mall🌴
    THE 🌫️SMOG🌫️ IS CUMMING TO BLOW YOU AWAY 🌬️🌬️💨🍆 💦 😶‍🌫️ Calling all spitters 💧💧💧and squirters 🌊🌊🌊We’ve got to WET 🚿🚿DOWN these 🔥🌲wildfires 🌲🔥 It’s H O T in 🇨🇦Canada 🇨🇦and they dropped us a big load so start pumping your HOES 🍆🍆💦💦🍑🍑 Stay inside for all VIGOROUS activity 😤😫Mask up 😷 outside unless you want to be 😵CHOKED 😵 by Canadas thick bush 🌳🌳🌳 ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥🇨🇦 Send this to 1️⃣0️⃣ climate CUMMIES If you get 0️⃣ back you won’t get fire 🔥 COCK 🍆🍆🍆 from big dick daddy fireFUCKERS👨‍🚒⛑️

    OOPSIE WOOPSIE!! 😳

      OOPSIE WOOPSIE!! 😳 Uwu 😚 We make a fucky wucky!! 🙅‍♂️🤷🏼‍♀️ A wittle fucko boingo! 🌈💫 The code monkeys 🙈🙉at our headquarters 🕍 💤 are working VEWY HAWD 💸💯 to fix this! ♿️

      PIZZA TOWER REFERENCE???

        IS THAT AN PIZZA TOWER REFERENCE?????? PIZZA TIME!🍕PIZZA TIME!🍕 PIZZA TIME!!!!!🍕 PIZZA HEAD IS COMING🍕!!!! YOU GOTTA RUN🍕!!!!!!😂😂😂😂😂 GET ALL THE TOPPINGS🍕!!!!!😂😂😂😂😂 WHAT YOU DONT LIKE PIZZA TOWER MEMES🍕???? EWWWW I RATE THAT A “C” FOR CRINGE OPINION🍕🍕!!!! YOU MADE ME DO THE PEPPINO SCREAM FOR HOW AWFUL YOU ARE AT MAKING OPINIONS🍕🍕🍕!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA(peppino[me] screaming) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA(cowboy cheese guy screaming) AAAAAAAAAAAA(noisy guy screaming)AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA(pizza head screaming) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!🍕🍕🍕 You are a total pizza tower FAKER🍕(get it it’s fake peepino reference XDDDDDDD) huh? am I annoying to you🍕?????? Kinda reminds me of THE NOISE🍕!!!!!(I am proud of that statement😁😁😁😁😁😁) I GET MORE BITCHES THAN YOU🧀🍕🍄🫘🍅🍍(you should try the minus 8 women mod it’s SEXY YOU LONELY ASS!!!!) CHEESE TO MEET YOU DUMBASS!!!!!!!!!!!🍕🧀🧀🍕🍕🧀

        Hurricane Season

          GET READY FOR THE BIG ONE 😏😏😏 TODAY IS THE START OF HURRICANE SEASON 🌀😬 AND ALL YOU SLUTTY STORM SURGERS BETTER GET READY 😤🌊 MAKE SURE YOU 🫵 CAN HANDLE A CATAWHOREY 5️⃣ EVEN IF THE BIG ONES SCARE YOU 😱😰 LOAD UP WITH PROTECTION 😉🪵 BEFORE YOU GET ALL WET 💧😅 WITH CORIOLIS EFFECT CUMMIES 💦💦 NAUGHTY MOTHER NATURE 👵💐 IS READY TO SLAM YOU HARD 😳😫 AND SHES HORNY FOR HURRICANES 🌪️⛈️😜 ‼️🚨🚨‼️ LOOK OUT ‼️🚨🚨‼️ THAT STORM IS CUMMING 😩😲😵 AND ITS GONNA WAKE THE NEIGHBORS 😨🤷‍♀️🤷 MAKE SURE TO CALL UP AL ROKER 👴🏾🌦️ AND ASK DADDY TO GO EASY ON YOUR FORESKIN🍆🥩 I MEAN CAST 🙏🫡 SEND THIS TO 🔟 HURRICANE HOTTIES 🔥🔥 OR YOU’LL GET NO HURRICANE THOTTIES 😈💅 IF YOU GET 5️⃣ RETURNED YOU’RE SURE TO GET YOUR BACK AND WINDOWS BLOWN OUT 💨💨💨 GET ALL 🔟 AND THE STORM SURGE ⛈️☔️ IS ALREADY INSIDE YOUR EVACUATION ZONE 🍑😉 PREPARE FOR A TY-POON!! 🌀🌪️😹
          heY 👋 u StOrMii 🌧 ☔️ SLUTZZZ 😬😋Hurricane ⛈ IDA is CUMMING 💦💦 & so is this DICK 🍆🍆‼️....Ladies 👯‍♀️ you ready for some Category 5️⃣ ASS fuCkIn ??? 😈🌨🌧 A state of 🚨EmerJIZZcy 🚨has been 😱 DICKlared 🚔 for New WHORE-leans, 😵 MissiTITsi, 😂👌🏼PENISSEE 🤠 & ArkansASS 🍑‼️No matter🙅🏼‍♂️where you at 🌎 dAt pussy’s 🐱gonna be DRenChEd! 🤣🤪 When IDA CUMS 💦 it's gonna be WET n WILD. 🤘🏽So make SURE to get the PROPER 😉 PROTECTION 🍆. Cus the wind 💨 is not gonna be the only thing BLOWIN tonight 😉👅. SEND to of your 1️⃣0️⃣ WETTEST bitches to get DRENCHED 😍 by Daddy tonight! 😍😘😘👅👅.

          TW: Why “Trigger Warning” is considered a trigger.

            ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ TW: Trigger Warning ‼️ ‼️ ‼️😈😈
            
            😎😎😎Trigger warnings are warnings that are placed at the beginning of a post to warn the reader🥵🥵 of potential traumatic triggers 😤😤that may be contained inside the post. However, for some, reading the "Trigger Warning" 😩😨😨😭😭part of the trigger warning may cause trauma👅👅 in which will ultimately make the trigger warning useless😱😱😱, as warning the reader of triggers can be a trigger.🥱🥱🥱 Why? Who knows, but "Trigger 😴😴Warnings" are traumatic experiences, too. Because of this, I offer a simple solution 😜😜to end the trigger warning trigger.😈😈 Simply do not use trigger warnings. 🤨🤨🤨🤨Why no trigger warnings? Well, 🗣to simply put it, trigger warnings are managing to trigger individuals who have seen countless trigger warnings, because 🎃there are triggers for everything. 😮😮😮By not using a trigger warning,❤ we won't have people getting triggered by seeing "Trigger Warning" at the top of a post. Therefore, ending this trigger😣😣 warning trigger👣 possibility in the list of😪 triggers. Well, without trigger warnings, there is a potential that there would be no way to warn a user about possible traumatic💤💌💌 experience triggers that🧠 may set someone off,⛷⛷⛷ causing 💥them to type a 500 page rant 💨💨on why this and that doesn't work with that because that left the💫 family home to go get 🤺🤺🤺milk. An alternative to the big "T🐁W" or "Trigger Warning" at the top of a post, just say what is the trigger so that someone cannot be triggered by seeing "Trigger Warning". For example: "Stuff talking about the brand new🦄🦄 My 🦄🦄Little🦄🦄 Pony🦄🦄 Convention👽👽 is up ahead, beware!💀💀💀💀💀💀" Getting straight😎😎 to the point with your warning can advise users to be cautious 🕳💢while reading your amazing🔆🔆 post. Thank you🦾🦾 for coming👀👀 to my 👯‍♀️TED👯‍♀️ talk.

            Complete💯✔️ Guide🗺️👨‍🏫📜 to Horse🐴🐎🏇🦄 Masturbation👊💦💦

              Horse🐴 masturbation👊💦💦 techniques🥋🤹 aren't🙅 the same♊ kinds of techniques🥋🤹 as, say🗣️, just⚖️ a guy👨 jerking off👊💦 or receiving📫 a blowjob🌬️🍆. They have very specific📍 stimulation💆💡 requirements📜. Generally🎖️ speaking🗣️, it's not🙅 possible🔮 for people👪 to stimulate💆💡 a horse🐎 in the correct✔️ manner🙇. In the videos📺 you've seen👁️ of women👩 "giving🎁 a horse🎠 a blowjob🌬️👅🐡" the horses🐴 aren't🙅 being fully💯 stimulated💡 properly🎩. Their cock🐓🍆 heads👨 aren't🙅 flaring✨, and, in most cases💼, their cocks🐓 are kind of malleable🥀🐍 and can👌 be moved🚚 around↩️ and stuff. This is because the stimulation💡 requirements📜 for getting their cocks🐓🍆 out of their sheaths🗡️👛 is vastly🌊 less than actual ejaculation🍆💦💦. In all of those videos📼, those people👪 are just⚖️ playing🤡⚽ with flaccid🥀 horse🐴 dick🍆 more or less. The "cum"💦💦 you see👁️ in those videos📹 is usually a watered💧 down⬇️ yogurt🥛🥄 that is put⛳ in their mouths👄🤤 in a camera🎥 transition💊🏳️‍🌈 and held📎 there until they spit🤤💦 it out. In order📦 to use those in most cases💼 though, the horse🐴 has to be willing👌🙋 to "mount"🗻 the device🔬, and begin🎬 the bucking💸🦌 and humping🐫🐪 on their own. This is usually achieved💯✔️ by spreading⚱️ estrus🤰🍑♀️ pheromones🌹👃💞 around↩️, gaining the horse's🐎 attention🛎️⚠️, and having them mount🗻 a sawhorse🚧🦄 or fence🚧 or something where the positioning📍 makes🎨 them believe💫✡️📿 that they are actually on top🎩🎪 of a Mare🐴🤰♀️. Then at that point☝️📌 they are attempting🙋 to shove👐 their, very erect🗼, cocks🐓🍆 into a Mare's🐴🤰♀️ vagina, but there is no🙅 Mare🐴🤰 present. If the person👨 with the artificial🤖 vagina🌮 isn't❌ fast💨 enough to get it around↩️ the horse's🐴 cock🍆, after about🤷 15-30 seconds⏱️ of attempted🙋 mounting🗻 the horse🐴 will try🙋 to give🎁 up⬆️ and reevaluate🤔⁉️ the situation💹. When a mount🗻 is successful💯✔️ though, actual copulation💑🌭🌮 only lasts⏱️ about🤷 15 seconds⏱️, and is VERY intense🎆🌟💥, thusly why the bucking💸🦌 and humping🐫🐪 is a key🗝️🔑 component⚙️🔌 for their ejaculation💦💦💦.