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Cursed Thoughts

Cursed thoughts shared in discussions that is ridiculous and absurd in nature that it became a meme. Usually about popular characters and people.


Potter, a moment of your time, please.

    Potter, a moment of your time, please.
    
    Someone has been stealing ingredients that could be used to make polyjuice potions.
    
    I know, I know. "It wasn't me professor, I would never transform into a girl and masturbate to find out how it feels", I've heard this little song and dance before.
    
    When I was your age I was the same. Did I ever tell you I stole your mother's hair regularly? I became quite adept at stealth and potions for this precise reason. To transform into your mother and pleasure myself.
    
    There is this mirror... or there was, at any rate, I can't seem to find it anymore, that showed you your fondest wish. I would transform into your mother, look into that mirror and watch myself make love to her while your father watched, helpless to change anything
    
    Those were the best orgasms of my life, Potter. One day things went wrong,
    
    Before I could find my way to a safe spot, your father found me, and thinking me Lily proceeded to fondle me
    
    It felt good, Potter. Forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest
    
    You know that polyjuice potion doesn't change your voice, of course. Yet James Potter never suspected a thing when I didn't speak. He smiled and said I was learning.
    
    Oh I learned alright. I learned never to touch polyjuice potion again. Not because I feared such a thing would happen again, but because I feared I would want it to. That I'd seek it out.
    
    Polyjuice potion and it's ingredients are restricted for a reason, Potter. The very recipe is not available to students.
    
    Keep that in mind, won't you?

    I’m addicted to plants versus zombies hentai

      Plants vs. Zombies is a 2009 tower defense video game developed and published by PopCap Games.
      One rainy night my parents were out and as a horny 13 yr old I was horny as shit. Jokingly I searched “plants vs zombies rule 34. And what I found was fucking amazing it’s eye candy. I want the pea shooter to sit on my dick. Day by day searching the web for some plants verses zombies hentai. It got so bad that I broke up with my gf because I like pvs hentai more than her.
      
      My favorite is pea shooter her drawings are gold, her big juicy mommy milkers are drawn with quality.

      WARNING: NEVER JERK OFF TO TRAP PORN

        Traps in anime culture is a male crossdresser whose cross-dressing so convincing that he's often mistaken for a real girl.
        WARNING: NEVER jerk of to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, it is a slippery slope! First yer jerkin it to a guy that looks a bit feminine, next thing you know? Yer in a pink miniskirt gettin ANALLY CREAMPIED and BUKKAKED by 4 cocks! I don’t even have 4 friends! And one of em thinks its a good idea to CUM IN YER HAIR does he KNOW how hard that shit is to get out? ITS FUCKIN HARD! I had to shower not ONCE, NOT TWICE, BUT 4 FUCKING TIMES, AND COMB MY HAIR FOR AT LEAST AN HOUR! Oh yeah, and despite what porn told me, CUM TASTES TERRIBLE, its far to salty, and less sticky as it is SLIMY.
        
        Yet again, NEVER jerk off to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, or you may end up like me.

        I want to fuck spongebob.

          Sigmabob Grindpants.
          I want to fuck Spongebob. I want to slide my semen hose into every dispersed crevice and hole of his ripe yellow dermis. I want him to crush my cock and balls against my will until they’re just as pendulous and flabby as his succulent sponge-skin. I want him to forcefully suck me off with his moist yellow cavities as I’m held down by Mr. Krab’s razor sharp sex-talons. If only he would role-play as Sigmabob Grindpants so I could grind my pathetic little cum drizzled fuck-sausage against his shorts, my life would be complete.

          Catgirl fetishes are over.

            Society finally recovered from the bee movie.
            SINCE FUCKING 2000-LATE I’VE BEEN HEARING ABOUT ELON MUSK MAKING CAT GIRLS AND THAT IS BULL SHIT. Catgirls? Catboys? That sounds stupid as fuck how about instead of making useless shit like pussy that goes nya nyaaan we make something, #BETTER #FUCNTIONAL #FUN
            
            That’s right motherfucker, I’m talking about anthropomorphic honey bees, AKA HUNNIES which sounds 10,000% better in English than CatGirl/Boy/Person/SpaceCadet . Have you not seen the hype on r/honeyfuckers ? Those MF’s are thicc. oH BuT aReNt MoSt BeEs MeN? Hurr hurrdy hurr, WHO CARES it’s crazy you spend 24 hours a day simping for some femboys but you can’t find a voluptuous piece of stinger yielding ass appealing? OBVIOUSLY if they’re going to genetically engineered they’re having at LEAST triple B tiddies if not larger. How about instead of waiting for the end of the world and cwying “uwuuuu daddy I nweed to gwo to the mwooon beclaws cwapitalizm is scawwwy” you shut the fuck up and accept the future is changing.

            Having to call a judge “your honor” is so cringey and dumb

              Having to call a judge “your honor” is so cringey and dumb
              
              “Your Honor”. I mean gimmie a fuckin’ break, dude. What else do you want me to call you? Your highness? Do you want me to fondle your nuts while I blow you, too?
              
              I’ve seriously seen courtrooms where they’ll say “Sir” and the judge will be like “It’s “Your Honor” young man!!”
              
              Fuck off. How much of an egotist you gotta be to care about some medieval-ass title?
              
              It’s some LARPING I’d expect kids to do. “Oh Billy you have to call me supreme ruler snorlax the magical wizard!!1!”
              
              Shut up.