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Cursed Thoughts

Cursed thoughts shared in discussions that is ridiculous and absurd in nature that it became a meme. Usually about popular characters and people.


You wanna know what the dumbest creature on this fucking planet is?

    B A S E D
    You wanna know what the dumbest creature on this fucking planet is? Moths. Let me tell you how fucking dumb these idiots are. They are nocturnal meaning they only come out at night but when they do they are attracted to light. Let that sink in. They come out in the dark... and the obsess over light. You fucking morons, haven't you heard of this thing called the sun? God I hate those stupid motherfuckers.

    I want to masturbate to all 807 Pokemon.

      You have to wank to official pokemon material. R34 doesn't count.
      I know that a lot of people want to catch em' all, but my job is a much bigger challenge. It is my goal to masturbate to all 898 Pokemon, plain and simple. I usually try to do it twice a day, regardless of the difficulties. At the end, I always win. I go on places like Deviantart, rule 34 and, occasionally e621 in order to achieve this massive goal, and when I finally do, I will become a Pokemon Master. Sometimes, it is easy. I can come in five minutes looking at Gardevoir or Lopunny pornos. Sometimes I come across major challenges that I have to overcome, in the case of Garbodor and Magikarp especially. I have to imagine the wet, sloppy fish mouth sucking on my cock without thinking about the actual fish itself. It is very hard, but the satisfaction you get when you achieve victory is immense. Not only do you get the generally pleasurable feeling from ejaculation, but you also know that you overcame an obstacle few men have dared to try. I have a total of 347 successful ejaculations total, but it only gets harder as I move on. When I see a Serperior, for instance, I have to think to myself "In what way can I imagine this creature in order to get off to it?" It is a puzzle for sure, considering I do not have a thing for (most) of these creatures, making it extremely entertaining and interesting for others to watch. I try to focus in on its somewhat beautiful face, and think about that more than the yards of snake behind it. I sometimes have issues with Pokemon like Machamp, who appear extremely male. But I always find a way. There has been no hurdle too steep for me. I want to be the very best. Anything lower does not cut it. And that is why I am beating off to pictures of Lucario on the Internet, mom. 

      Own a musket for home defense

        Tally Ho Lads
        Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

        Vegan Ejaculation

          Stay woke sis 👁👁🧠🧘🏿‍♀️
          If he ejaculates semen it’s because his body is full of toxins and he has had too many sexual partners. Men are not supposed to have semen it’s unclean. Vegan men with few sex partners ejaculate fresh water. Find a virginal man and leave these McDonald’s eating thots alone!
          
          Stay woke sis 👁👁🧠🧘🏿‍♀️

          Putting on a blindfold and getting your dick sucked is a perfect representation of quantum mechanics

            If you're blindfolded and getting your dick sucked, you're in a superposition of it being simultaneously gay and not gay, since you don't know if it's a guy sucking your dick or a girl. Therefore it would be logical to assume that both cases are true, and that the quantum system (you getting sucked off) is in multiple states (gay and not gay) at once: the very definition of a superposition. The moment you remove the blindfold, this system collapses, as you are making a measurement as to whether or not a guy or a girl is sucking you off; whether or not it's gay. This irreversibly destroys the superposition, as even if you put the blindfold back on, the uncertainty is no longer present.

            I think orc women are hotter than real women

              I’m not even going to lie here, but I know I’m going to get hate. Orc women are just so much hotter than your average human female. They are big, buff, and green. I find them much more attractive overall.