Holy fucking shit. I want to bang the tf2 sniper so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to 2fort battlements I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of him online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with mundy. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of snipers tight assassin bussy. I want him to have my assassin/crazed gunman babies.
Fuck, my fucking mom caught me fucking my dad's rifle again. I'd modify it to look like his gun and went to fucking town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my PC. I might not ever get to see sniper again.
Did you know that in 2004, the fast food chain "Sonic" broke Rule 34 of the Secure Inflation Act by printing their own money to cut costs in the company, which was a factor that lead to the 2008-2009 Recession and the downfall of the market. Look up "Sonic Rule 34 Inflation" for more info
My kitten (my angel, my love, my darling) is chubby, subby and femme. He just mentioned that seeing porn that reflects his body type makes him feel better.
He is the prettiest loveliest thing I've ever seen, so I'm all over the chance to make him feel that way. Does anyone have good references for (drawn) porn of cute femboys with tummies? I would owe you my life ;-;
Context: My best friend from college was an extreme all-rounder. From excelling at academics to having a great social life and relationships, he had it all covered. I never resented him but had this animalistic urge to pull him down to a deprived state, to be above him in the social hierarchy. WHAT BETTER WAY TO DO THIS THAN FUCKING HIS MOM, RIGHT?
I mean, I will always be superior to him, No matter how much he accomplishes. Anyways so, I made this the goal of my otherwise meaningless life. I would repeatedly tell him, "I'm going to fuck your mom," but he thought I was joking (You wanna bet?).
And So, initially, I snooped around his legal documents (which were easy to get a hold of since he was my roommate). I would tease him occasionally, but that was just cheap fun, time to kick it up a notch.
During sleepovers at his house, I would discreetly try to strike up conversations with his mother, but See, Indian parents can be unnecessarily conservative. They won't even have sex with one another, let alone cheat with a stranger. So the chances of me seducing her were dim, to begin with. Drugging her was out of the question (because that would be rape, and it's illegal in India), and I obviously won't indulge in such demeaning acts.
Consent is not overrated, as some hooligans believe.
So my only option was to wait for her to die and fuck the decaying brains out of Ex-Mrs.M (Ex for Expired lmfaoo).
Patience does pay. Finally, after waiting 20 dreadful years, the (D for dick, haha) D-Day came, for which I waited so anxiously. He invited me to her funeral. After all, I'm his best friend.
Now Hold-up, as for the Deus ex machina, Hindus generally burn the dead body, so it would've been difficult for me to fuck her ashes. For those wondering what I did while she was alive. Well, I spent all that time trying to manipulate him and his family to convert to Christianity.
Getting back, now after the funeral, I waited for everyone to leave. That day the sun was particularly picturesque, with the carefree crimson clouds strolling in the sky. I dug up the grave, broke open the coffin, and Man, did I give her a good fuck. The kind of fuck she never got when she was alive, The surreal sexual fulfillment which, even though she was dead, her body couldn't deny as her vagina clenched, which made me bust my nut prematurely (I'm not proud of it). I fucked her not out of love but out of pity.
Guys, rigor mortis is a sham. A good pounding can unite those dead or alive.
As I stroked my flaccid penis, I made eye contact with my best friend. A bouquet of freshly plucked flowers fell from his hands along with a teardrop which struck the ground simultaneously. He completely broke down, knees too weak to support his frail body, and all this time, he still looked into the eyes of the man who bested him.
I condescendingly looked at that pathetic excuse for a man, blood rushed into my penis, and I got the most rigid erection of my life. I vigorously rubbed my cock, and a fountain of jizz came out and spilled everywhere on his mother's body. The lighting made my seed look almost golden. Dopamine rushed through my nerves. I felt elated.
I then walked towards him with my pants still down, " Wanna go munging?" I offered. He felt a sharp pain in his heart, and he fell unconscious.
He's been in a coma ever since. Being a good friend, I now look after his family. But I guess his mother wasn't enough for me, hehe. His sister, wife, and daughter are next on my Fill-Bill!
I'm taking a break from the ironic gay porn. Recently I had a dream about me being with half naked oiled up black men for some reason in that dream, I thought it's a joke so I laughed and went along, when I noticed we are in a room, they're taking pictures. Dream me suddenly realized it's not a joke and ran for my life this nightmare had scarred my brain and I think I have PTSD.
Hi,
I've been with a few women in my life and one thing I've noticed is that the female anus is incredibly close to the vagina, in fact they're barely an inch apart.
I'm not sure about other guys - but doesn't this disturb you? It feel like a design flaw in women actually -- like they're supposed to be so feminine and beautiful yet this ghastly little oversight is ruining everything.
Somehow it feels to me that women should be more aware of this flaw and it should affect their confidence. Whenever I see a so-called beautiful woman walking down the street so care-free thinking she's all that I just remember her anus is only 1 inch away from her pussy and laugh her into oblivion.
Women: Please accept that they're too close together, let it negatively affect your confidence and so make yourselves more readily available sexually as a result. Afterall, we're having to sleep with a creature whos ANUS is only 1 inch away from the vagina --- you should not make this difficult. It's unappetizing enough as it is. We're doing you a favour.
Men: Do not let women forget this flaw, and do not forgive them for it. Remind them of it constantly less they get inflated egos and think they're all that
They're just too close together, sorry, but its true.
