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CSGO

Archive of all known CSGO copypasta about pro players to Valve’s meme response to Hiko’s missed shots to the 48 year old man from Somalia.

You motherfuckers don’t even know what the real GRIND is

    You motherfuckers don’t even know what the real GRIND is, I have been grinding whole my life to get where I am today. I have been grinding when there was no online qualifiers every 2nd week, no Tier2 events to prove yourself anywhere, no faceit or whatsoever.

    Ji Tu – Art of Choke

      G2 team in CS2

      Similar to the Hu Xi copypasta, its a troll on G2 Esports by romanization of the player and team names into Chinese. Snax, NiKo, huNter, m0NESY, malbsMd and G2 has been changed into their respective Chinese equivalent.

      Counter Strike 2

      🈵JI TU🈵ART OF CHOKE🈵MAO NI ZHI🈵 EM MA DI 🈵 HAN TA 🈵 XI NAX 🈵 
      Ji Tu - Art of Choke
      
      Starring Snak Su, Ni Koh, Han Ta, Mo Neh Xi, and Mal Sem Di.

      Valorant

      🈵 JI TU 🈵 ART OF CHOKE 🈵 ZHOU NA PI 🈵 WA LIN 🈵 ZHAO GE MO 🈵 LI FU 🈵 TLENT 🈵 
      JI TU BigPhish ART OF CHOKE BigPhish FA LIN BigPhish TLENT BigPhish ZHAO GE MO BigPhish ZHOU NA PI BigPhish LI FU

      He operates in the half-space between causality and chaos. His velocity isn’t speed, it’s spatial entropy.

        It came from a Twitter post about Omar Marmoush who is a footballer for Manchester City.

        Omar Marmoush operates in the half-space between causality and chaos. His velocity isn't speed, it's spatial entropy. He doesn’t run behind the defence; he quantum-leaps into unoccupied xThreat zones, disrupting vertical compactness and destabilising low-block temporal integrity

        Counter-Strike 2

        tn1r operates in the half-space between causality and chaos. His flicks aren’t speed, it's spatial entropy. He doesn’t lurk behind the defence; he quantum-leaps into unoccupied xThreat zones, disrupting vertical compactness and destabilising CT side temporal integrity. 

        tarik – Unfortunately, teams require team players and he hasnt quite obtained that skill yet

          Its a CS copypasta where “hazed” gave his take on why “tarik” isn’t on a team.

          Ive been friends with him for about 3 years and talk to him pretty much everyday as we and a bunch of other players hang out in the same mumble for years now. He is insane. His individual play is absurd. Anyone can vouch for that. A lot of you are questioning why he isnt on a team if he can be so good. Its simple, he plays for himself. He always has. If he cared more about his team play, he would be on NCG in my place i can guarantee you that. He is far better than me individually but he has no regard for team play.
          
          Unfortunately, teams require team players and he hasnt quite obtained that skill yet. Im hoping he will some day as he would be a problem for any team to deal with.

          is it me or is olofmeister a bit of a boring player

            olof

            Started from a HLTV thread somewhere in 2016 during Fanatic era of CSGO, its now a classic CS copypasta due to how satirical it sounds.

            Olofmeister

            is it me or is olofmeister a bit of a boring player
            
            like u see it at the end of the game "oh wow olof has 32 kills" but u can never remember them.
            
            can u remember a single olof kill ?
            
            but try guardian...u can see the flick i remember a guardian flick.

            NAF

            is it me or is NAF a bit of a boring player
            
            like u see it at the end of the game "oh wow sloth has 32 kills" but u can never remember them.
            
            can u remember a single sloth kill ?
            
            but try guardian...u can see the flick i remember a guardian flick.

            Zywoo

            is it me or is zywoo a bit of a boring player
            
            like u see it at the end of the game "oh wow zywoo has 32 kills" but u can never remember them.
            
            can u remember a single zywoo kill ?
            
            but try s1mple...u can see the flick i remember a s1mple flick.

            WHAT a performance from Karrigan

              Karrigan copypasta
              WHAT a performance from Karrigan, 30 camera glances, 12 pointing at his head after his teammates clutched a round, 5 stand ups out of his chair, 4 ear cuppings after winning against an eco, 2 staring contests with the camera and to top it all of 1 kill in the deciding map, truly GOAT status