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Taking a shit saved my life

    A story about how taking a shit saved someones life
    I was ready to kill myself, I had the suicide note ready and everything. Before heading out to buy some rope for a hangmans noose I suddenly had the urge to shit and figured, why the hell not, one last shit wouldn't hurt. Sat down on the toilet and opened up twitter since I always get bored on the toilet. Saw a funny thread, liked it, and shared it with the only real friend I have.
    
    After taking a shit I realised I no longer had the urge to buy the rope. My 'post-shit clarity' came to my senses and I started thinking about all the things I would leave behind like my siblings, my friends, and my dog and rabbit, and how distraught they would be if I went through with my actions.
    
    No longer do I feel the need to kill myself. Although I may not have much to live for, I would still be leaving behind friends and family, so I will keep trying my best to make them proud.
    
    Thank you, poop.