war thunder

War Thunder – one look at that frame will turn any straight man gay and any gay man ace.

From a deranged comment on r/Warthunder complaining about missile spam meta for the game.

... yeah no thanks, one look at that frame will turn any straight man gay and any gay man ace. Top tier gameplay will continue to deflate my weiner sufficiently enough that I can substitute it for wearing a cage, or as an alternative to Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.

Miss me with your dogshite Gaijin, bring back WW2-cold war-focused updates if you want to play it safe & make us happy, give us some WWI-interwar action if you want to try something new & special (don't half-ass it), give us a much needed complete engine overhaul, finally fucking decompress BR's significantly and get some real balancing going! Just give us something- anything unique or innovative! Or you can get the fuck out. Because right now, you're trying to expand towards modern with game balancing and an engine that doesn't support it.

you're losing me as a loyal paying player with nearly 4000 hours. This shit isn't fun and I've already started playing other games over your drivel ass updates. Regain some god damn creative vision, make some outside swings, stop circling the toilet bowl you've placed yourself in.

I know you're doing financially well, but you're burning good will with your community and have been for years. It eventually catches up, and I think a lot of us are waiting and praying for some one to try it but better; to take a shot at the king.

I can't complain about 4k hours, truly I can't! And you've already gotten your fair share of cash from me, which is fine. But your existence as a live service game tells me that you want me to keep paying and playing. Not gonna happen if you keep this shit up.

So far I'm thinking you're more on the ball with Enlisted these days than you've been on War Thunder for at least two years now.

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives.

War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess.

The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator.

My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction.

I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle!

Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.