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Star Wars copypasta


Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano?

    Infamous Ahsoka Tano copypasta
    “And she was a good friend” 😔👆
    Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your father’s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems.
    
    Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while we’d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi “training” of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics you’d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as she’d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal.
    
    We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.

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    The intent is to provide players with a sense of pride and accomplishment

      The intent is to provide players with a sense of pride and accomplishment for unlocking different heroes.
      
      As for cost, we selected initial values based upon data from the Open Beta and other adjustments made to milestone rewards before launch. Among other things, we're looking at average per-player credit earn rates on a daily basis, and we'll be making constant adjustments to ensure that players have challenges that are compelling, rewarding, and of course attainable via gameplay.
      
      We appreciate the candid feedback, and the passion the community has put forth around the current topics here on Reddit, our forums and across numerous social media outlets.
      
      Our team will continue to make changes and monitor community feedback and update everyone as soon and as often as we can.

      History of the most downvoted comment on Reddit

      The copypasta was from a response by the EA Community Team on Reddit towards another person’s post on the aggressive monetization in Star Wars: Battlefront. During that time, the game was one of the most hyped entries of the year as it was a new IP set in the Star Wars universe and developed by DICE the developers behind the Battlefield series. However, many players were left angry and disappointed when iconic character such as Darth Vader are gated behind expensive paywalls or extremely grindy progression system.

      Hence someone made a post criticizing EA which lead to the “sense of pride and accomplishment” response and the drama ensued.

      Aayla secura death

        Aayla Secura copypasta
        Okay this is kinda weird but I used to jack off to the scene where Aayla Secura gets killed. Basically when I was 13, I didn't have access to real porn, I had no internet or anything so I had to masturbate to either Viagra ads (with the women in the bikinis) or else my own drawn pictures of women in bikinis which were horrible. Also I used to kinda get a hardon when I watched people die in movies, when I was 7 or 8 I avoided war movies because they gave me a stiffy, I don't really know why. So hot chick + death = super hot, at least for me back then cause I was just starting to sexually awaken. So I fast-forwarded to her walking through the fungus trees and suddenly she gets shot and you can see her ass jiggling when she hit the ground and I would rub my penis with my hand playing that scene on repeat. Then I fucked up my DVD player by messing up A-B repeat then pulling the power which made it fuck up somehow, I don't remember I just remember panicking thinking I broke it. But anyway I used to get a huge hard-on watching her die over and over and watching her ass jiggle a bit when she hit the ground, the problem is that the camera then pans backward up toward the sky and a leaf covers her body pretty quickly so you don't get to see much, cause they keep shooting her after she dies and her ass keeps jiggling as they mutilate her corpse with their laser guns, but that stupid fucking leaf gets in the way. I remember getting so goddamn pissed at that leaf. I'd be about to cum and it'd get in the way and fucking ruin everything.

        Accidentally killed my gf while fucking her

          My journey to the Dark Side was complete
          So my gf(f19), was over and we were casually watching The Empire Strikes Back(I am 19 btw). And then, the Han freezing in carbonite scene came, and when Leia said 'I love you' to him, I kissed my gf. She was taken aback, and soon she started kissing me too. I slowly pushed her down on the bed as we had more steamy, passionate and romantic kissing. In no time, our clothes were off, and I was ready to put it in. But our dumbasses forgot to pause the movie... As soon as I was putting it in, the 'I am your father' line came and I instantly got harder. My gf was loving this. I put it in her. She screamed with joy. I was also having fun. But then, the Imperial march started playing. I felt something come over me. The Sith shall rise. In my anger and lust for power I force choked my girlfriend. My journey to the Dark Side was complete. Luke's resistance and weakness to join the darkside completely enraged me. I am now marching all the way to Los Angeles to beat up Mark Hamill with my lightsaber.
          
          If you only knew the power of the Dark Side, Luke

          Jedi Sex Workers

            Jedi giving force handjobs
            you ever think about how force users would be the best sex workers ever? they could use force choke or force lightning on their kinky clients, while giving force handjobs to more normal ones. they could also use the force to enhance their sexual abilities, and use the force to enlarge their sexual organs. they could even cause orgasm with the force if they wanted to, imagine yoda's massive 24 inch throbbing green cock he hid beneath that robe of his, Obi-Wan Kenobi? More like Obi-Wan CanBlowMe. Anyways, thank you for coming to my ted talk.

            Darth Plagueis The Wise

              Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.