rick and morty copypasta

ALIENS HAVING SEX BE LIKE

ALIENS HAVING SEX BE LIKE

alien q: WOOOOOOH your glimwop is blurgulating my tight little fwooshola 😍

alien 2: ohhhh yeah im gonna blurgulate your fwooshola so hard you dirty fucking klimbop👽

alien 1: OHHHHH GOOD GNORBLORP IM ABOUT TO SPLORB!!! 💦💦💦💦😍😍

alien 2: thats right fucking klimbop bagobloosh take my fucking GLIMWOP!! 👽im about to SPLORBBBBB!!!!! splorbs all ovwr alien 1's fwooshola 🍆🍆🍆💦💦💦💦

alien 1: OOOOOHHHH MYYYYYYYYY GOODNESS GNORBLOP MY SCHNATZELGORB IS FUCKING BOOSHING!! 👽👽👽FUCKKKK~~~~~~~!!

alien 2: your fwooshola is glooping 🤣

alien 1: 😘you bet it is after you blurgulated me baby <3

⚠️⚠️IMPORTANT!! always remember to YINNLOP after you blurgulate ⚠️⚠️

IM A PEDO MORTY!!! IM PEDOPHILE RRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"I MADE QUESTIONABLE CONVERSATIONS WITH GIRLS I KNEW WERE TEENAGERS, MORTY, I- I (buuurp) I TALKED TO THEM OVER TEXT AND DMS, M-MORTY. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DID MORTY? DO YOU KNOW? I SOFT GROOMED THEM, MORTY. I SOFT GROOMED THOSE GIRLS. WUBALUBADUBDUB!!!! Ohhhhhh jeeeeeeeezzz Rick, I mean, that's kind of fucked up don't you think, I mean, those girls, they were underaged and- DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT, MORTY? THAT'S WHY I DID IT. I SOFT GROOMED THEM BECAUSE OF THEIR AGE, MAR-MORTY. MY FUNCTIONAL CAREER IS OVER, MORTY. Ohhhhhhhh jeeeeeeeeeeeeze Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh SHUT THE FUCK UP MORTY, IT'S GOING TO BE ALRIGHT, MORTY. I'M GONNA BEAT MY WIFE, MORTY. I'M GOING TO BEAT MY FUCKING WIFE. I'M GOING TO BEAT HER TO DEATH MORTY, BECAUSE THEN SHE'LL BE DEAD, AND I'LL GET DOMESTIC ABUSE CHARGES. JUST ME, BEATING MY WIFE, MORTY. FOR A HUNDRED YEARS. A HUNDRED SEASONS, NOTHING BUT 100 EPISODES A SEASON EVERY YEAR, ME, BEATING MY DEAD WIFE, MORTY. BEATING MY WIFE AND TALKING TO UNDERAGED GIRLS WHILE I'M DRUNK, MORTY. A HUNDRED SEASONS. ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick"

IM A PEDO MORTY!!! IM PEDOPHILE RRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"I MADE QUESTIONABLE CONVERSATIONS WITH GIRLS I KNEW WERE TEENAGERS, MORTY, I- I (buuurp) I TALKED TO THEM OVER TEXT AND DMS, M-MORTY. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DID MORTY? DO YOU KNOW? I SOFT GROOMED THEM, MORTY. I SOFT GROOMED THOSE GIRLS. WUBALUBADUBDUB!!!! Ohhhhhh jeeeeeeeezzz Rick, I mean, that's kind of fucked up don't you think, I mean, those girls, they were underaged and- DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT, MORTY? THAT'S WHY I DID IT. I SOFT GROOMED THEM BECAUSE OF THEIR AGE, MAR-MORTY. MY FUNCTIONAL CAREER IS OVER, MORTY. Ohhhhhhhh jeeeeeeeeeeeeze Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh SHUT THE FUCK UP MORTY, IT'S GOING TO BE ALRIGHT, MORTY. I'M GONNA BEAT MY WIFE, MORTY. I'M GOING TO BEAT MY FUCKING WIFE. I'M GOING TO BEAT HER TO DEATH MORTY, BECAUSE THEN SHE'LL BE DEAD, AND I'LL GET DOMESTIC ABUSE CHARGES. JUST ME, BEATING MY WIFE, MORTY. FOR A HUNDRED YEARS. A HUNDRED SEASONS, NOTHING BUT 100 EPISODES A SEASON EVERY YEAR, ME, BEATING MY DEAD WIFE, MORTY. BEATING MY WIFE AND TALKING TO UNDERAGED GIRLS WHILE I'M DRUNK, MORTY. A HUNDRED SEASONS. ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick"

Adult Swim cuts ties with Justin Roiland

I MADE QUESTIONABLE CONVERSATIONS WITH GIRLS I KNEW WERE TEENAGERS, MORTY, I- I (buuurp) I TALKED TO THEM OVER TEXT AND DMS, M-MORTY. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DID MORTY? DO YOU KNOW? I SOFT GROOMED THEM, MORTY. I SOFT GROOMED THOSE GIRLS. WUBALUBADUBDUB!!!!

Ohhhhhh jeeeeeeeezzz Rick, I mean, that's kind of fucked up don't you think, I mean, those girls, they were underaged and-

DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT, MORTY? THAT'S WHY I DID IT. I SOFT GROOMED THEM BECAUSE OF THEIR AGE, MAR-MORTY. MY FUNCTIONAL CAREER IS OVER, MORTY.

Ohhhhhhhh jeeeeeeeeeeeeze Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

SHUT THE FUCK UP MORTY, IT'S GOING TO BE ALRIGHT, MORTY. I'M GONNA BEAT MY WIFE, MORTY. I'M GOING TO BEAT MY FUCKING WIFE. I'M GOING TO BEAT HER TO DEATH MORTY, BECAUSE THEN SHE'LL BE DEAD, AND I'LL GET DOMESTIC ABUSE CHARGES. JUST ME, BEATING MY WIFE, MORTY. FOR A HUNDRED YEARS. A HUNDRED SEASONS, NOTHING BUT 100 EPISODES A SEASON EVERY YEAR, ME, BEATING MY DEAD WIFE, MORTY. BEATING MY WIFE AND TALKING TO UNDERAGED GIRLS WHILE I'M DRUNK, MORTY. A HUNDRED SEASONS.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick

We had a good thing, you stupid son of a bitch! We had Adult Swim. We had a lab. We had everything we needed, and it all ran like clockwork. You could've shut your mouth, do your voices and made as much money as you ever needed. It was perfect. But, no, you just had to blow it up. You and your dick

How I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old

Many people always ask me how I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old who skipped 3 grades of high school. They think I got in because of my scholarly records, but no the key is the interview. As I sat in the Harvard Dean's office in front of the board of reviewers for my application, the Dean asks me "Why should you be a good candidate for this school?" They seemed bored but I replied "Well I was born a child prodigy, placed 1st in my state spelling bee for three consecutive years, I can speak eight different languages not counting Latin, play four different instruments, I skipped grades 4 through 6, and graduated my high school as valedictorian at the age of 14. I then worked as an intern at both Telsa, and NASA." Suddenly the room burst into laughter and many of board instantly started scribbling down "No" near the application check marks. The Dean says "Sorry but you are just not the type we are looking for." But then I said "Excuse me but I wasn't finished... I watch Rick and Morty" The Dean looked at me like an idiot and said "So....?" Then I replied with a smile "And I understand all the references and subtle jokes" An audible gasp let out by the board was so loud the secretary had to come in. You could hear a pin drop and then suddenly all at once the entire board clicked their pens on the "Approved Box" and I was instantly handed a diploma and now I'm teaching advanced physicals there. I guess you can say I'm pretty smart. :)

I can’t jerk off to summer from rick and morty anymore

I've been overanalyzing the show with my 200 IQ and I've noticed that Jerry Smith from the show Rick and Morty looks exactly like his daughter Summer Smith from Rick and Morty. They just added a ponytail and made Jerry Smith's hair orange to make him look like a female, ever since I've come to this conclusion, i haven't been able to relieve stress by pleasuring myself to rick and morty porn (straight), i guess I'm jerking off to my little pony forever because this is just unacceptable, they either rework Summer Smith's character design or i will officially stop being a part of the Rick and Morty Community.

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