So I (39F) have a son (15M) and he brought a friend round today.
They immediately went to their room and I assumed they would just play some video games or whatever so I was totally fine leaving them.
It was about 30 minutes in when I was walking past, I heard sounds such as 'Omg that's so good' and 'Its so good with that in it' and various 'mmmm' sounds.
It really sounded like they were having gay sex, I was super weirded out by it so I quickly went downstairs and waited for his friend to leave. When this friend left an hour or two later I asked my son what they were doing in his room (because although I don't mind him being gay, and ik it's normal for teenagers to have sex, a condom really should be used) so I planned to confront him about that.
However the answer shocked me to my very core. They weren't having sex, they were eating hummus.
I was shocked, and initially didn't believe it. We had never had hummus before and I asked him to show me the hummus if this was true. So he did, and I ate hummus for the first time, and oh my god was it good. We experimented with different things in it like bread and carrots and it was great. Apparently his friend had heard about how he had never had hummus before and thought this was absurd so had planned a date for a hummus party.
So yeah, it ended up being quite a good ending, i discovered how nice hummus was.
TLDR: Thought my son was having gay sex, he just really liked hummus.
This fucking joke of a subreddit is the sole reason I can no longer listen to Kid A anymore.
This WAS my favourite album of all time, nevermind in the context of the Radiohead discography. The album is a masterpiece especially compared to today's pop trash on the radio. On my darkest days, I would put this album on and be moved to tears everytime.
But the fucking basement dwellers of r/radioheadcirclejerk have ruined any sense of enjoyment I had listening to the album. Mainly because of the stupid fucking meme of "HoLY SHIt GuYS hE SaID IcE AgE CoMInG Did ThOm YorkE PrEDicT tHe IcE aGe MoVie CoMIng OuT?!!??" And whenever I listen to the album and it gets to Idiotque, I break down in hysterics because all I can think of is that dumbass fucking meme and the subhuman trash populating that subreddit. It ruins and emotional weigh and meaning to the songs because it's clouded by their absolute stupidity.
I had to bring this up to my therapist because this album was so special to me and this whole experience psychologically damaged me.
I guess art is dead because people can't take art seriously anymore. They have to make it about some dead fucking meme or something and entirely devalue the art. This is the death of art happening before our very eyes, folks. And if you won't stand for the most influential artist of the century and not let their name be smeared by jokers of the internet, than you are not a true radiohead fan.
I want r/radioheadcirclejerk to be taken down because this is a disgrace to human expression and an assult on the psyche.
Fuck you and fuck your dumbass fucking memes. Radiohead deserves way better.
If a single post mentions a girl all you fucking see in the comments is shit like "booba" "milkers" "titties" like literally how the fuck aren't any of you embarrassed of yourselves, seriously look at yourselves. Would u want anyone in real life to see you commenting this shit? probably fucking not and your all like literally fucking 13 anyway. I'm convinced half this whole fucking subreddit is just 500 pound landwhales behind the screen, you all have literally no lives, how about you just go watch porn instead of living out your sexual fantasies in a subreddit for fucking teenagers. Y'all need to grow up.
Also if I see one single fucking "but its horny teenagers what do u expect" im literally gonna go fucking insane or something, being hormonal isnt an excuse for this kinda shit, its weird.
Please next time before you go to make some weird ass creepy comment, just think, would you still make that comment if you weren't anonymous? If the answer is no, then the comment doesn't belong here, go to a porn subreddit or something.
Please shut up.
I get it, you’re horny. But nobody wants to hear about all the times you’ve masturbated to your sibling, and nobody wants to hear about һоѡ your tits got in the way of something. Nobody wants to hear your “pwease be my friend 🥺👉👈” crap when posting stuff like this is exactly the reason why you have no friends. You complain about not having bfs/gfs and yet you post garbage with zero self awareness. “Boobs tits or ass” һоѡ about grass you cum stained landwhale. Go outside. Get some vitamin D. Get some friends. Get something other than erection every time you see a woman.
So my gf(f19), was over and we were casually watching The Empire Strikes Back(I am 19 btw). And then, the Han freezing in carbonite scene came, and when Leia said 'I love you' to him, I kissed my gf. She was taken aback, and soon she started kissing me too. I slowly pushed her down on the bed as we had more steamy, passionate and romantic kissing. In no time, our clothes were off, and I was ready to put it in. But our dumbasses forgot to pause the movie... As soon as I was putting it in, the 'I am your father' line came and I instantly got harder. My gf was loving this. I put it in her. She screamed with joy. I was also having fun. But then, the Imperial march started playing. I felt something come over me. The Sith shall rise. In my anger and lust for power I force choked my girlfriend. My journey to the Dark Side was complete. Luke's resistance and weakness to join the darkside completely enraged me. I am now marching all the way to Los Angeles to beat up Mark Hamill with my lightsaber.
If you only knew the power of the Dark Side, Luke
Yeah.. title gives away the bread and butter here.. I don’t know when this started, or how it got so out of control.
There’s been a few times my boyfriend has fallen asleep before me and I just hold his soft penis while I browse social media before I go to bed too. Idk, I just really like the way it feels, I love his dick. A few times it would get hard because I’d be squeezing it Then before I knew it it became jerking him off.. Sometimes he rolls over, sometimes he precums, sometimes i just stop and let it go soft again.
It’s at the point that I intentionally stay awake longer than he does so I can play with his penis.
I feel like an absolute creep show. I’ve never told him and there’s a chance I never will. He already feels like my sex drive is higher than his and that I want/talk about sex too much.
I don’t even know how I let it get like this Staying awake until 10-11am just so I can play with my boyfriends privates is not how I envisioned I’d be spending most of my nights..
If your partner confessed that they jerk you off when you’re asleep what would your reaction be?.. better to keep it to myself or tell him?
