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My GF won’t stop calling my penis “Danny Devito”

    I literally wish I were joking. I made a throwaway so my buddies don't see this but I've got to tell someone.

My names Dan which is probably important to the story. A few weeks ago gf and I got high together and were just chilling when she suddenly starts giggling hysterically. I ask what shes laughing at and she tells me she decided to nickname my dick. Fine, fair enough. She then goes on to say "Little Dan" was too common and the only other name she could think of was "Danny Devito".

Redditors it has been two weeks. She has not stopped calling my penis Danny Devito. She literally texted me an hour ago, and it said "How's Danny and his Devitos doing?"

And listen, it's funny. But the worst part is that I'm not sure she even knows who Danny Devito is. We were watching The Godfather and she literally thought Al Pacino was Danny Devito.

    I stole a girl’s panties in the 8th grade and I feel really bad about it

      It happened in science class. The cheerleaders had just gotten back from practice and I was sitting directly behind the girl I had a crush on. Her bag was placed behind her and I saw where the bag wasn't fully zipped up and a pair of her panties were sprouting out the side. When I'm horny I barely think straight.. the lights were off and we were watching a science documentary on the projector so I thought I'd be able to get them without anyone seeing, I took them out slowly and kept an eye out. I thought I was successful.. I did many ungodly things with those panties.

By 3rd period at school the next day, all of the guys were calling me "panty boy" and I of course already knew what that was about.. the nickname stuck for the rest of the year and I'm still called it occasionally, mostly by friends. Me and that girl were kind of friends before and I was trying to build up the courage to ask her out prior, but I knew that was no longer possible. She never said anything about it, but she avoided me at all costs.. a lot of the guys would tease her for what I did, there were times I thought that I should stand up for her, but I was too much of a coward and didn't want to look "uncool" besides, how could the guy that did the pervy act be the good guy in the situation? So I just left it alone. What had happened was very humiliating for me, but I'm sure that what I felt was only half of what she must have felt..

I'm going to be a junior this year and I still can't stop thinking about it.. I feel disgusting for being such a little perv. I'm really contemplating reaching out to her and apologizing. Is that a good idea? or should I just leave it in the past?

      I’m so fucking done with this goddamned site

        I've just witnessed the torturing of an anime woman. having tennis balls, pumped into her vagina. while someone, stuck a racket in her ass. i'm so fucking done with this goddamned site, i wanna die. i've seen so many things in my time, furries, bdsm, ball busting. but this, takes the fucking cake. metaphorically. i'm done, so done. please, someone shoot me. its over, i've lost faith in humanity. in this goddamn world, i undestand furries, understand bdsm, but i cant comprehend this fucking crime against nature.

Sincerely, a broken man.

        My boyfriend’s foreplay is tetris

          I (F22) met my boyfriend (M18) on tetrio.com and have been together for 1 year. We are long-distance and communicate primarily via Discord. We are very happy together and have many interests in common, primarily Tetris. We have recently started to move our relationship forward in intimacy which has caused multiple problems.

First, his rank is higher than mine. But the thing is, I've been playing solo on my own so I'm now only 2 levels behind him. He's getting really passive aggressive about it too. ;( Second, he moans whenever he places a T-spin. It was funny at first, but now it is bothering me. He insists it "gets him in the mood." Which leads me to my next point:

Third, he cannot begin to be intimate without first winning a TetraLeague game. I am crazy in love with this man, but when we try to move further (via phone), he first must win a game (all while moaning) and makes me sit in listen. Even after he wins, when we are in the midst of foreplay, he will talk about how he "loves my tetris strategy" and refers to his dick as a "line piece entering my middle well". When he comes, he moans "ALL CLEAR".

Is this relationship worth saving? I envision a future with this man and I really love him, but I need help overcoming this hurdle in our relationship.

TLDR: my boyfriend refers to tetris in inappropriate moments. How do I make him stop?

          Women of reddit

            Le Reddit Moment
            Original comment
            WOMEN OF REDDIT,

How much sex do you have? What I am wondering if do you have sexy sex? As a fellow epic reddito I would like to inquire a question on perhaps the idea that perhaps maybe you enjoy sexual intercourse of the boob variety with fellow epic redditors that also like sex with big boobs?????

Also epic women of Reddit, how much epic sex do you have with boobs of Reddit? Women do you Women of Reddit? How many Big Chungus sex do you have women of Reddit? Women of Reddit, are you also Women? Perhaps maybe even have sex with other women and women of Reddit?

Also, fellow women of reddit do you have giant milkers?????? Big jiggly milkies? Fat mommy milky mocha momos? Excuse my up frontness. Please answer why or why not or maybe big boobs? Spaghetti?

Women of the internet website known as Reddit .com, what do you find attractive in men that are also me? Would you give me a blowjob, women of Reddit? Reddit, would you have sex with me? Women what is your favorite blowjob position? Men of Reddit, do you like getting blowjobs? Why or why not?

Women of Reddit, do you have BIG BOOBS???? Women of Reddit will you have sex with men that have big boobs? Why or why not or why yes? Women that are women of Reddit, if given a chance to use your ENORMOUS BIG BOBOS to have sex with men of reddit, would you? Perhaps maybe even have sex?

Sexy women of Reddit, is this an epic reddit women moment? Would you have sex if you were given the chance to have sex? And what if the snail was locked in a box under the ocean, but if the snail touches you you die but also have sex?? you were given a million dollars to have sex with me?? Reddit of Reddit, would you have sex with the decoy snail that is also boobs???

Women with three million dollars, if you were given a super power to have sex with me would you have sex with epic reddit? Women with giant jugs of Reddit, if you were given a billion dollars and also a ham sandwich, would you have sex with me and fellow epic women of Reddit?? What villain was actually the hero of the story?

Men of Reddit, if you were given a billion dollars would you get a blowjob from a woman with big boobs that is of Reddit? What if I choose to also have sex with this guy's dead wife that also has big dead boobs? Why? Women are boobs.

What villain actually had huge boobs and was a woman? Men of Reddit would you be a women of Reddit? Women of Reddit, will you be??? Fellow women of reddit

women
            Women of reddit(18F) , what is the most sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexies(47F)t sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexu(28F)al sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual (56M)sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexie(45m)st sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual sexual sexy sex sex sexual sexy sexual sexiest sexier sex sexual

Thing you have ever done to an antisocial 36 year old man living with his parents and spends 16 hours a day browsing reddit?

Edit: Thank you for the gold kind stranger!

            AITA for pulling out a glock 17 on my teacher because she said “I don’t know , can you?”

              I know the title may sound like a little bit of an overreaction , but hear me out . She had been saying it all the time I asked her if I could go to the toilet , and I was tired and a little annoyed by it .

Today was the last straw , I really needed to pee badly so I went to ask her if I can go to the toilet , "I don't know, can you?" she replied with a smug look . I had finally had enough and pulled out my glock 17 from my left pocket , loaded the magazine , and shot in her direction 4 times . I made sure the bullets didn't actually hit her because I knew I should be the bigger man and control myself .

She suffered cardiac arrest and a little bit of hearing impairment due to this , she's doing alright in the hospital now . I was sent the therapy because i was "overreacting" and what not , the therapist told me that I really was overreacting and that I'm a "psychopath" , it infuriated me and I pulled out my glock 17 from my left pocket again and pointed it at him , but I decided to be the bigger man and control myself and not shoot him , he immediately shut up and let me go .

So tell me reddit , was I really "overreacting" by (rightfully) pulling out my glock 17 in these two situations ? I personally think my actions were justified . AITA ?