A young woman was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be very liberal, and among other liberal ideals, was very much in favor of higher taxes to support more government programs, in other words redistribution of wealth.
She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch conservative, a feeling she openly expressed. Based on the lectures that she had participated in, and the occasional chat with a professor, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his.
One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programs.
The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father. He responded by asking how she was doing in school.
Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying.
Her father listened and then asked, "How is your friend Audrey doing?"
She replied, "Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies and she barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus; college for her is a blast. She's always invited to all the parties and lots of times she doesn't even show up for classes because she's too hung over."
Her wise father asked his daughter, "Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0. That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA."
The daughter, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back, "That's a crazy idea, how would that be fair! I've worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time, and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my tail off!"
The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, "Welcome to the conservative side of the fence."
If you ever wondered what side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!
If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn't buy one. If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn't eat meat. If a liberal is a Vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation. A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels. Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.
If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church. A liberal Non-believer wants any mention of God and Jesus silenced.
If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.
If a conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh. A liberal will delete it because he's "offended."
Ha that’s nice liberal, I see they got you workin the easy shift. Not me, I’m going in for my 36 hour shift at the ball brushing factory, where they crush my BALLS. That’s right, every day I slap these puppies up there on the hydraulic press and have more than 6 trillion newtons of force exerted directly onto my BALLS. I’m hoping for a new company record, 6.1 trillion newtons exerted directly on my BALLS. I’m hopin to win the company gift card. $25 at macys, so my girlfriend could get a nice pair of headphones, and not have to listen to me whine about my crushed balls. That I got from the ball crushing factory. I don’t even know what’s going on down there anymore, I’m scared to look.
I’m a white Christian conservative man which automatically makes me a terrible person apparently in the eyes of liberal women. I’ve been told I don’t get an opinion because I’m a white man lol
Im a Trump supporter who is voting for Trump again. I don’t own many guns, but I have a couple. Im also pro life and I go to church regularly.
That being said, I have to admit I have this attraction to liberal women. I know it sounds crazy. It really does. But I can’t help it.
When I see Ana Kasparian go on a rant, I may 100% disagree, but I can feel her passion and that’s a turn on. When I see you crazy liberal women shouting people down at marches, once again I may disagree but I can’t help but like it.
You get extra points if you have tattoos and piercings but it’s definitely not a requirement. I also don’t mind if your hair color is different. Race also doesn’t matter to me unlike you liberal women 😉
I want to see you wear a MAGA hat even though you probably despise it. I want you to take pictures posing with my guns. You may think you won’t like it but you will 😉
I got a message for all you liberals out there. You want my gun? My firearm? Come take it from me. Just walk through my door come into my home and take it from me. With your weak, soft, liberal, girlish hands. Just try and put those hands on me. Those soft liberal hands. Put em on me! On my body. Just slowly, gently dragging your fingers up and down my arm, giving me goosebumps. You want my gun!? Come kiss me for it! But not like right away, don't be too obvious with it. Lets do that thing where we- our faces get close to each other, and you know it's gonna happen it's just a matter of time, you just stare at each others lips but you're waiting for the right signal to give yourself over to them completely. Come do that for my gun! Bite my lip and play with my hair, for my firearm! If you want my gun, come spank me for it! Not like- not not like too hard but like- like still hard. You know li- like hurt me but make me feel safe at the same time! You pussy liberals!
Please consider pronouns before going to war
Remember that, in the fog of war, people will likely refer to you by the gender assigned to you at birth.
So make sure you wear a badge with your preferred pronouns so that you don't suffer unnecessary verbal violence and bigotry in the field.
The last thing you want to hear is someone mis-gendering you as you bleed out after a fire fight.
Expect to encounter a lot of heteronormative language - typical of the chauvinist environment in which you will find yourself.
Shouts like "watch out, lads", "listen in, boys" and other micro-aggressions will wear you down as the white male dominated armed forces attempt to erase your lived experience.
If you can, be the change you want to see. You can do this by shouting "Zhere coming from the south!", or "two possible BIPOC folx taking cover at your 6!".
People will respect your efforts to be inclusive in the theatre of war.
Ultimately, silence is violence, and you'll be wanting as little additional violence as possible.
I hate Trump, and everything about him. I am white but I wish I wasn't. Just because I am white doesn't mean I deserve rights. In fact I don't. I should be treated like a dog, just like my mom should be too. She's just such a blonde hoe anyway?
Can you upvote pls?
