Deep Rock Galactic

Created by u/vanilla_disco, its based on the original 4chan classic ‘Shopping cart is the ultimate litmus test‘ but changed to Dorreta from Deep Rock Galactic.

Doretta's head is the ultimate litmus test for whether a person is capable of self-governing.

To return Doretta's head is an easy, convenient task and one which we all recognize as the correct, appropriate thing to do. To return the head is objectively right. There are no situations other than dire emergencies in which a person is not able to return the head. Simultaneously, it is not illegal to abandon Doretta's head. Therefore Doretta's head presents itself as the apex example of whether a person will do what is right without being forced to do it. No one will punish you for not returning the head, no one will fine you or otherwise punish you for not returning the head. You will gain nothing by returning the head. You must return Doretta's head out of the goodness of your own heart. You must return it because it is the right thing to do - because it is correct.

A person who is unable to do this is no better than an animal, an absolute savage who can only be made to do what is right by threatening them with a law and the force that stands behind it.

Doretta's head is what determines whether a person is a good or bad member of society. 

Doretta's head is the ultimate litmus test for whether a dwarf is capable of self-governing. To return Doretta's head is an easy, convenient task and one which we all recognize as the correct, appropriate thing to do. To return Doretta's head is objectively right. There are no situations other than dire emergencies in which a dwarf is not able to return the head. Simultaneously, it is not illegal to abandon Doretta's head. Therefore Doretta's head presents itself as the apex example of whether a dwarf will do what is right without being forced to do it. 

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, miners? I'll have you know I was promoted to the top of my class on the space rig, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Hoxxes IV, and I have over 300 confirmed dreadnought eliminations. I am trained in glyphid warfare and I'm the top sniper in DRG. You are nothing to me but mere employees. I will wipe you all the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this damn planet, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me on your terminal? Think again, fuckers. As we speak I am contacting management and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, miners. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your lives. You're fucking dead, dwarf. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my m1000 Classic. Not only am I extensively trained in ranged combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the company and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable asses off the face of the continent, you little shits. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comments were about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongues. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiots. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, miners.

(+1 damage, -0.2 sec reload for BRT)

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Full Chamber Seal. The damage boost is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of the dps formulas most of the overclock potential will go over a typical player's head. There's also that amazing -0.2 second reload, which turns the weapon into an absolute sustained damage beast.

I've just realised it's the most powerful overclock in the entire game. I'm not trying to be an elitist but if you don't have it equipped I'm kicking you out of my hazard 3 mission. Full Chamber Seal is far superior in power to everything else due to it giving free damage with basically instant reload time and no downsides! This thing shouldn't be in the game, it's literally overpowered and I still don't know how the devs thought it was a good idea to add this behemoth of an upgrade. Imagine having to wait 1 more week without having access to this beauty because this didn't drop in your weekly deep dive rewards, I would definitely kill myself.