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Copypasta Simp

Browse every Simp copypasta from the infamous Discord message “can we honestly e date?” to the classic “*JAW DROPS humina humina awooga” copypasta.


My god, my dad is such a fucking simp you guys

    My god, my dad is such a fucking simp you guys. Last night, my dad started saying all these cringe things to my mom because it was their "20 year anniversary" like "I love you" and "I can't imagine my life without you". I was cringing so hard but then this morning, my cuck dad decided to make my mom breakfast in bed and I swear to god, my face contorted like I ate a sour lemon raw. I couldn't imagine the man who made me would become such a beta cuck soyboy simp for a woman. I told my dad he was acting like a little bitch and he said he thought it was time for me to move out. All because I'm 34 years old and called him out for being a major pussy and loving his wife. So glad to move out of this cringe house as soon as my social security check come in the mail.

    Lord Maximus

      Lord Maximus 22 | 5'10" | Pisces | Has cats [76% match]

Lord Maximus at your service m’lady, level 82 DM, feminist, gentleman, sandwich lover, burrito lover, woman lover.
 
*ahem* Listen Carefully, M'lady, it seems you have stolen something from me,and i am very upset, i will have no choice but to contact the town sheriff to place in the stocks,for thieving, if you do not return my heart to me posthaste, this kind of behaviour will not be tollerated, however, i am willing to overlook this transgression, if tou agree to a date with me, otherwise chareges will be pressed for the stealing of my heart, i await your letter of acceptance *kisses hand and blows* yours truly,lord Maximus

      ok simp 😎

        Oh, so you support your girlfriend?

You simp. Okay Homer SIMPson. You absolute simpanzee. OOO OOO OO OO EE EE OO 🐒 <- that is you. You are nothing but sludge . You are putrid muck given form, weakness personified. I am not sympathetic. You are simp pathetic.

        asian girl

          so today at school i saw this hot girl. super hot. super asian. chinese btw. she speaks mandarin. so anyways she had like the fattest ass ever and im talking fucking fat like FAT like so big you could see it from the front. so i walk up to her like i got a lot of money. my dad always taught me walking confident will boost your confidence. i like my dad but he sucks cats tits and i hate that. its a habit im trying to get him to stop. he says its beneficial to his health or whatever. so after i walk up to her like my cat-tit-sucking dad taught me to i say hi. she says hi back. im staring into her lips as i feel an intense feeling of euphoria. just her voice was enough to nigga knock my socks off. i ask her what cup size she wears and she says her boobs are too big for a bra. as shes talking i take the moment to stick my face into her fat titties and motorboat the shit out of them. she then stepped on my cock and balls and popped my scrotum. semen and blood were flying everywhere and it was so sexy. AWOOOOOOGAAAAA i yell. she then calls me a weirdo so i walk away. what should i do?