Breaking Bad copypasta

The pasta is referring to a sex scene of Walter and Skyler in Breaking Bad S4E5.

Even though, there's so much porn on the Internet, there's something about the passionate kissing and thrusting between them that turned me on in a way that normal porn doesn't. And just hearing the passion and drive whilst they were clawing at each other and thrusting in a deep sense of lust was entrancing. I tried finding the scene or the episode for free online by some sketchy website but I couldn't find it so I waited for no one to be home and I logged onto my dad's Netflix account on the TV and filmed the scene on my phone. I then fast forwarded it to the end of the episode so it didn't appear on continue watching. Finally, I sat on the toilet and tugged it out with one hand and used the other hand to press replay on the video. I turned the audio to the max since no one was home. This is all 100% true. I'm only posting my confession in the hope that everyone on r/okbuddychicanery ignores it because it's too wordy and it gets lost on the subreddit. It feels great to get this off my chest. If you've done something similar please let me know so I don't feel weird and if you haven't then just ignore this please. Also it will be funny af if the mods remove this but I've seen worse on this subreddit. 

In two separate occasions we saw Walter and Hank, receiving a handjob from their respective wives: Walter in S1 EP1; Hank in S3 EP12.

There is a clear contrast between these 2 scenes.
Walter got a handjob before all hell broke loose. He hadn't received his cancer diagnosis yet, and he was living a pretty mundane and "boring life". You can see it by how uninterested he and Skyler were during that scene.
Hank, on the other hand, had just experienced the most traumatic experience of his life. Marie's handjob had emotion behind it. It wasn't meant to just pleasure Hank, but to rejuvenate him. To give him some vigor and confidence during a hard time.

But one thing that really seals the deal for me, is their names(stay with me, it will make sense). You see, Walter is a Germanic name that means "Commander Of The Troops". Pretty much foreshadowing what was about to come in later seasons. But there is more. Walter didn't orgasm during that scene, so his "troops"(aka sperm) didn't come out. Implying that Walter wasn't a commander of the troops, at that point...also his last name is white, the color of sperm.

As for Hank, this will blow your mind.
Hank kinda sounds like wank, but It also sounds like honk... a car honk. Hello?! He was almost killed in a parking lot , while inside his car. You can hear a car honk throughout his fight scene against the Salamanca cousins. Still don't believe me? Hank's last name, Schrader, is a type of pneumatic tire valve that is used in most cars around the world. "OP but the Schrader valves are also used on bikes"...I guess there wasn't any major event in the show that involved someone riding a bike, right?! Guys, it's all connected!
The way Vince Gilligan used these two scenes to backshadow and foreshadow is nothing less than godly.