I have never beaten Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne. I can’t beat Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne.
It all began the first time I got to Ikebukuro. I finally defeated the matador by buffing retards so he’d kill them instead, and when I finally reached the town I was greeted by the biggest, manliest demon I’ve ever seen: Oni.
Oni is perfect. Those crimson abs, gigantic, powerful biceps that could snap your spine in half, and small beady eyes. It took every bit of willpower that I had to power through the Mantra HQ and continue with the game. But then later came the Ikebukuro tunnels.
Immediately knowing that I was going into a dark tunnel complex with four big, strong Oni lurking around got me super aroused. I was sweating buckets, my hands clamming up and my Captain America underpants were getting tight. When I ran into the first Oni down there I completely lost myself. When it attacked me, I couldn’t bear to attack back. I just wanted to let myself be brutalized and taken deep into the tunnels by these 4 big manly demons, never to be seen again.
God, I could just imagine it. My battered body being thrown over the thug’s shoulder and carried for hours to the deepest point of the tunnels. Being roughly hurled to the ground as all 4 of them whip out their giant, red floppy dongs and let loose a torrent of warm, golden liquid all over my bare, bruised buns. Relieving themselves completely all over me, leaving me helpless in a growing pool of their glorious golden nectar. Coming back time and time again to pee on me, using me like a cheap magatsuhi battery.
To this day I have never gotten through the tunnels because I cannot muster the willpower to willingly escape these obscenely sexy demons.
I need help, r/megaten. How can I complete Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne, when every fiber of my being begs me to end my journey through the vortex world being showered in Oni pee and surrendering all my magatsuhi?
