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I live in fear of my giant dong.

    So today, I decided to measure my cock, just to look and see, like every man does. I planned to report back to my dudes... For the boys, y’know? So I get a boner, and I measure it with a ruler from my mom’s desk drawer... and it’s too fucking big for anyone to believe me if I told them. I’m now having a moral crisis, because if I tell the bros about my huge cock, they won’t believe me. But momma didn’t raise a liar. So now I’m stuck between having a brosation with my guys about my huge fucking horse cock, or forever hiding in the third leg closet. How do I come about coping with the knowledge that I have a giant pulsing lightsaber dong?

    TIFU by using Belle Delphine’s Gamer Girl condoms

      Quick backstory to why I even had one in the first place (I'm not a simp I swear)

A couple weeks ago it was my irl cake day and as a joke/gag gift, my friend bought 2 gamer girl condoms as he knew my gf and I were getting it on and wanted to embarrass us (we all laughed and no one was upset). I open up the small package and see the 2 of them just sitting there and couldn't control my laughter. But that's not why you're here to. Let's fast forward 2 days. My gf and I are starting to get steamy and right as we get that feeling, I realize I don't have any condoms and didn't buy any recently. So, in my stroke of genius, I remember the gift and go to my closet, take one, do a mental happy tap dance, and proceed (anyone over the age of 13 knows what happened next). Alright, let's now fast forward to yesterday. The past couple days my gf has been feeling off. Mostly an upset stomach. She also said she had this weird feeling as she said she was supposed to be on her girls days a few days ago (I don't know how they know that stuff). Then she looks at me with fear in her eyes as she nearly yells Oh GOD and say we have to go to the drugstore right now. So we do that, she goes into the bathroom, and. She's. Pregnant. My first thought was holy shit ima be a dad, then how would we support the kid. My gf hugs me and we just sit there, not knowing what to do. She isn't sure she's ready for a for a kid. But I'm going to fast forward again 5 minutes to when I wonder how this happened in the first place. Then I remember the condom. So I return to my closet, open the second one, put my finger in it and rub it against my hand. In 5 minutes, I can see tears start to appear (I had a bit of lube of it to recreate the circumstances). And I knew that's how it happened. That's how I fucked up by using Gamer girl condoms. Thank you if u managed to read this far, fuckin legend.

TL:DR I got my gf pregnant bc of sucky condoms

Edit: I'll give an update in a few days to a week.

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