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AITA for ending my marriage over Animal Crossing??

    Isabelle says 'wtf'
    Isabelle says ‘wtf’
    I (65m) and my wife 24(f) have been together for 8 years, married for 4. All my friends are jealous that i was able to score such a hot young woman but it’s starting to cause some problems in our relationship believe it or not.
    
    When the pandemic hit, I was very nervous since I’m not in great health. We decided to buy the Nintendo Switch and play this game called Animal Crossing. I guess it’s popular with the kids?
    
    Anywho, we start building this town and everything was fine at first. Then, my wife decides that she wants to remodel the town. No problem. But she starts cutting down all the trees, destroying the cliffs, removing the river, etc... I told her this is out of line. We should respect nature not destroy it. Her answer? It was ugly and she didn’t like to walk the long way around.
    
    She also takes all of my hard earned money from fishing and gambles it all away on turnip stocks. Last week she spent 400k on turnips and sold them for 260k. Do you know how many red snappers I need to catch to make that back up? I’m trying to retire soon and it’s making me think she doesn’t know how to manage money.
    
    What really drove me to the breaking point, my best friend Boon is on the island and we really get along. He likes to lift weights, so do I. I log into the game one day and build him a gift. When I try to find him, he’s nowhere to be found... I ask, where is boon? She doesn’t answer. Where is Boon ?? She says “I kicked him off the island, he was annoying”. Reddit, she kicked my best friend off the island without even talking to me.
    
    The next day I filed for divorce and kicked her out. I’m keeping the switch and rebuilding our town. Hopefully Boon comes back. AITA or did I doge a bullet with my sociopathic (ex)wife?
    
    Edit: Thank you all for the support and messages over the last 24hrs. It’s been a wild day but the good news is that after a few hours of island hopping I was able to find Boon and convince him to come back to my island. Seems like things are heading in the right direction.

    Raped by Ben Shapiro

      Ben shapiro
      Ben Shapiro
      I was RAPED once.
      
      I was a 16 YEAR OLD VIRGIN LIBERAL and one night I was walking home from the library. FRIGHTENED I took a shortcut down A DARK ALLEY. I heard a SINISTER LAUGH and BEN SHAPIRO jumped out from behind a trash can! "Well well," he sneered, "looks like the INVISIBLE HAND has ensured that my DEMAND is met by your SUPPLY. What a TRIUMPH OF THE FREE MARKET..."
      
      I said capital always accumulates in the hands of the wealthy, but to no avail. He just laughed and whipped out his THROBBING 12 CHAPTER TREATISE. He shoved me roughly against the wall and started filling my ear with STEAMY CITATIONS. I struggled but got SLAPPED IN THE FACE WITH ROCK HARD DATA for my efforts.
      
      MEWLING AND WHIMPERING I tried to check his privilege. He just bellowed, "YOUR RESISTANCE ONLY MAKES MY CONCLUSIONS FIRMER!" I started to explain power theory and he RAMMED MY OWN WORDS DOWN MY THROAT. My premises and spirit broken, I couldn't get a word in edgewise because I was GAGGING ON SLIMY MEATY ARGUMENTS.
      
      It was awful. His HUGE ARGUMENT was TOO BIG to fit inside my TIGHT VIRGIN BRAIN. Some of the founder facts he PULLED OUT only to immediately JAM BACK INSIDE. It seemed to go on forever but finally, FORCING ME OPEN, his PENETRATING ARGUMENT came to a CLIMAX. It was agony as ROUND AFTER ROUND of THICK ROPY FACTS and HOT STICKY LOGIC were PUMPED DEEP INSIDE me.
      
      Weeping, I lay in a PUDDLE OF STINKING NEOCON RHETORIC. I didn't see where he went, but BEN SHAPIRO'S VIRILE IDEAS had been irresistibly PLANTED DEEP INSIDE me. I tried to abort the memory, but NINE MONTHS LATER I was BORN AGAIN CONSERVATIVE.
      
      This is my truth. POUND ME TOO!

      I may be able to solve world hunger with cantaloupe

        Cantaloupe melon
        A Cantaloupe melon
        Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon into my anus because the local shops had run out of apricots (I buy a lot). Using about a gallon of butter, breathing techniques and a few hours I managed to finally get it inside. However it was too uncomfortable so I tried to shit it back out. This is where things got confusing because rather than a melon sliding out half a dozen apricots did. Now there is a chance that I just blacked out upon excreting the cantaloupe and it rolled away somewhere and that I happened to have a dozen or so left over apricots lying around my rectum from earlier but I cannot for the life of me find the melon anywhere. I think I may have the power to anally turn melons into apricots. Further experimentation will be required of course (once my rectum has recovered) but if this turns out to be true then I may be able to solve world hunger.

        Why is six afraid of seven?

          Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam
          Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness.
          
          Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary. Six is afraid of Seven because he is a damn psychopath.

          I fucked a carp

            Carp is a common name for various species of freshwater fish of the family Cyprinidae
            Carp is a common name for various species of freshwater fish of the family Cyprinidae
            I live in a shitty town; I have an older sister, mom and dad. My father is a compulsive angler. He often brings home really big carps, catfishes, pikes and sanders. Nevertheless, what I liked the most was the carps, the golden giants.
             
            A year ago, I was at home, jerking off to some porn when I heard my dad outside, joyfully coming home with his friends. I quickly turned porn off and turned Skyrim on. My father's squad came in, I left my computer to greet them and then I saw that my father was holding a trophy of a 9-kilogram carp. I shared his triumph. Dad left the carp at home and went to the bar with his friends. I stayed at home alone and I decided to have a better look at the carp.
             
            It was still alive and was moving its giant mouth. I imagined, idk why, that carp blowing me. Then I felt an erection. I think you can already guess what I did, I fucked the carp in its mouth with remarkably meaty lips, and I came right into its mouth. Doing so, I felt an extraordinary pleasure.
             
            I forgot about this case later, especially since my father sold that carp at the market. However, when my father was bringing small carps weighting a kilogram or two, I started fucking them, too. I fucked carps and European carps all year long, and fucking smaller carps felt better because their mouths fitted my dick precisely. I loved fucking them while they were still alive, moving their lips around my cock. Over the span of half a year, I fucked, probably, more than 40, probably even 50 carps. I fucked them several times a day, nutted into their assholes, idk why, sometimes I fucked them again when they were already frozen in a refrigerator, but that was for a rainy day. I even tried to fuck a bream once but its mouth was too small. I fucked a chub once, but still, the carps were the best for me, and whenever my father asked me what he should aim to catch tomorrow, I convinced him to get carps, allegedly because their meat tastes very good.
             
            Here's what happened next. My father hadn't been fishing carps for a week. I hadn't been fucking carps for a week. I was walking in a daze, I really wanted to fuck a new fish, I thought about catching a carp myself but I was too lazy and furthermore, I hate fishing. My father only brought one small pike over the span of the week, probably because it was late Fall and he said that it wasn't interesting to catch carps at that time or something. I remember him seemingly starting to suspect something about my carp-mania by I was talking my way out as if I just liked the taste of it and that was it.
             
            My father brought home an 8-kilogram catfish. I really wanted to fuck with a fish and so I started considering that catfish. Why not, its mouth was fine, except for the teeth, but it generally couldn't do anything, only scratch if you strongly press against it, tops. I thought that that would do it. I got my dick exposed, jerked it a little and put in the mouth of the catfish still alive, which by the way was in a bowl of water, and started fucking it. I fucked it for a little more but after a minute, a terrible thing happened. The catfish squeezed my cock and seemingly tried to rip it off, but didn't manage to, it just swiped its teeth against my dick really hardly. I pulled it out immediately, it was all scratched badly as fuck, it was bleeding, I hit the catfish with my leg and it fell in the bowl of water. Blood was streaming from my dick. I fucking bandaged it, put spirit on it. Then I wiped the blood off from the floor. The dick was aching really badly. It swelled up, but later it healed up, some scars were left though. It was a good thing that nobody found out that I fucked fish and had a bandage on my dick. So, my dick healed up completely after a month. I haven't fucked anything through the whole winter and then in Spring my father started bringing carps from fishing again, and I started fucking them again. I fucked the last carp two days ago. Top of that, boobs and generally girls don't turn me on anymore, but I get hard instantly whenever I see a carp's face. My dick got completely smelled up by the fish to the point it's impossible to wash it off. So what, am I some kind of a fish-phile? Am I even normal?