Skip to content

The time I watched in awe as a kid jerked off in my zoom science class

    This was the second to last week of the school year, and my science class was doing an activity in groups. My group finished quick and the teacher brought us back to the main room. It’s about 5 kids and the teacher. Some kid is having a convo with the teacher and i’m on instagram.

Then i see this kid do a weird move in the corner of my eye. My undivided attention is now on this kid. It looks like he was pulling his pants down. Next thing i know, he’s full on jerking it. No shame, no attempt to hide it.

It’s obvious: he’s looking down and giving those telling facial expressions as his left hand (and he’s a lefty so it’s even more solidifying) is going ham down there. The webcam cut off at where his bellybutton would be, so i was luckily was spared from seeing e v e r y t h i n g.

Anyways, he goes at it, doesn’t even care if anyone sees him, he finishes with that head roll with closed eyes move. Then I could see the teacher, who appeared to be the only other one noticing. She had a look like “I don’t fucking believe this, but it’s weird to call him out.” So we both have this subtle wtf look, and this kid pulls up his pants and goes back to his monitor.

The best part of this whole situation is the fact that he had zero shame. Nada. He didn’t give a shit that he was jerking off in front of 5 people. When he goes back, I actually have my mouth open in shock at this point, but the teacher and i are still the only ones that even seem to notice.

The fact that no one gave a shit and this kid was one camera angle away from being a full on cam guy baffles me to this day.

If you’re the kid that jerked off in 7th period science and reading this, I fully expect extreme awkwardness if we have any classes next year.

    AITA For angrily telling my boyfriend to stop saying memes out loud in front of my tech illiterate parents?

      AITA For angrily telling my boyfriend to stop saying memes out loud in front of my tech illiterate parents?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months. He is a cutiepie. I love how sweet, kind and sensitive he is. That being said, he always gets incredibly nervous around my parents even though they are extremely easy going. We are both about 18, and with the lockdown restrictions easing up due to less cases, my parents invited us over for dinner.

Usually, he says memes out loud once in a while. I thought he was just using them ironically, but he was actually serious about them. I don't know if he got nervous or if he wanted to make a good impression, but he repeatedly said memes out loud and explained them to my parents as a way to keep the conversation alive. This happened well over 3 times during dinner and I was mortified.

My dad was talking about his friend who was in the hospital battling the virus, and my boyfriend explained him the whole 'press F to pay respect' thing. My parents didn't interject so he said 'pikachu shock face' , 'destroyed 1000' in conversation.I kept trying to divert his attention towards me and wanted him to stop. I had finally had enough when he said 'stonks' and explained what it was when my dad talked about his business picking up again.

I literally held his hand, took him to my room and told himhe was being stupid as hell. I understand that he was nervous, but this behavior was honestly just bizarre

      No fap challenge: year 80

        I have done it, 80 years and not a single nut bust. Thanks to my incredible goal i have obtained an iq of 156 which i have used to build a pc that deletes system 32 when it loads any type of NSFW. I’m currently in a hospital bed dying of terminal disease, however, this is a victory as in 72 hours i’m expected to die. Wish me luck in this final run.

        Whenever someone says “meow”

          Wowwwww, you meow like a cat! That means you are one, right? Shut the fuck up. If you really want to be put on a leash and treated like a domestic animal then that’s called a fetish, not “quirky” or “cute”. What part of you seriously thinks that any part of acting like a feline establishes a reputation of appreciation? Is it your lack of any defining aspect of personality that urges you to resort to shitty representations of cats to create an illusion of meaning in your worthless life? Wearing “cat ears” in the shape of headbands further notes the complete absence of human attribution to your false sense of personality, such as intelligence or charisma in any form or shape. Where do you think this mindset’s gonna lead you? You think you’re funny, random, quirky even? What makes you think that acting like a fucking cat will make a goddamn hyena laugh? I, personally, feel extremely sympathetic towards you as your only escape from the worthless thing you call your existence is to pretend to be an animal. But it’s not a worthy choice to assert this horrifying fact as a dominant trait, mainly because personality traits require an initial personality to lay their foundation on. You’re not worthy of anybody’s time, so go fuck off, “cat-girl”.

          What is my perfect crime?

            What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning, the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.

            Atheism humor

              He-he guys (snicker) hey guys! If you- (begins to chuckle) you’re relig (laughing hard now) religious, (begins to wheeze, as my massive cranium lacks the needed oxygen to think of this joke and to survive) You are LITERALLY IN A CULT (I transform into a being of pure energy, literally ascended by the sheer humour of my comment, as my heavenly being enters the n̵̪̞͙̍́̓͊th dimension you can faintly hear a final wheeze)