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It’s My Cake Day.

    obligatory "happy cake day"
    I have a cyan cake next to my username. Give me karma. This is non-negotiable, and if any opposition occurs, it will result in you getting 360 no-scoped by my elite team of cake day enforcers. If that doesn’t work, I will find your IP address, go to your home, and flay you alive. Your body will be more mangled than my ex-wife’s hand that got stuck in the garbage disposal. I will then sell your organs on the black market for copious amounts of money (which I will use to make a time machine to travel to my next cake day). I will then murder your whole family and bury them under my heretic blood-shrine. You will sorrow as the deep pits of hell envelop you and all you love, for not upvoting my post. Be scared. Fear.

Give me karma.

    Guys, I’m literally detecting seismic activity.

      That perfect chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. 
      Guys, I’m literally detecting seismic activity. I never wanted to rock with anyone more than I want to with Carl. That perfect, chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. The majestic mountains of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never rock with him, pass my sediment through him, and have him birth a set of perfect hot springs. I'd do fricking ANYTHING for the chance to get Carl’s rocks off. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fricking bear. Why would Supercell create something so perfect? To fricking tantalize us? Fricking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fricking can't anymore. Frick.

      Y U DO DIS ascii

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        Cyberpunk 2077 – Female character options are very disappointing.

          Heated gamer moment
          Female "nude" options are very limited compared to male. I do not understand how they can make penis physics and multiple look options but there are no boobs physics. And boobs options look plastic/fake, no full natural option. The one Vagina option is censored also, no anatomical details like labia etc. What a disappointment.

          Hot Minecraft Sex

            the virus downloaded this mod mom I swear!
            I was looking for minecraft mods when I found a mod that says "Hot Minecraft sex mod". I didnt want to install it because I live in a Christian household who would disapprove of it. However my curiosity got the best of me and I downloaded it anyway. When I logged in and started a new world this naked minecraft girl with big tits was walking up to me. I didnt want it to happen, but it did. My thot senses were off the charts as she tackled and fucked me. I looked up and around my screen to make sure nobody was watching. I turned around and looked at the man who was behind me. I was expecting the FBI to be all over me because of what I was doing, but it wasnt. It was Mark Zuckerberg who was watching me. He looked at me and said "playing with a minecraft sex mod eh? That's gonna be worth a lot when I sell your data without consent." I pleaded and begged him not to sell my data but he kept saying that he would make big loads of cash. The next day I opened my computer and all I saw were minecraft tiddy mods. As if anything couldnt get any worse, someone walked in on me and I tried to explain to them I got hacked but they didnt believe me and now I'm in big trouble.