Duolingo copypasta
I’ve fled my hometown, changed my number and stolen a 2018 Ford Fiesta, but nothing seems to be working. I uninstalled the Duolingo app 5 days ago, but I still get the notifications demanding me to learn Spanish. On the third day, I heard a window downstairs break and found a brick on the floor. There was a note tied to it saying,”Your time is almost up. Learn the fucking mexican words or else”. I don’t have the work ethic to dedicate the effort to learn the language, and just accepted my fate. But the next day, when I found the brakes in my car removed after causing a minor accident at a nearby intersection, I realized that I’m afraid to die. In that very moment, I received another notification saying,“It’s too late for practice now. Speak the Spanish all you want, I will make sure of tu muerte”. I then turned around to see what I swear was a mass of neon green feathers dart behind a tree. I did not sleep that night, and I’m thankful for it. A few hours after I went to bed, the owl appeared in my window, but quickly fled after I drew my firearm from my nightstand. That’s when I decided it was time to leave, and later stole a car parked down my street. But I know that my fate is sealed. Because every second I’m not running, he’s only getting closer. The notifications from the deleted duolingo app have been getting progressively darker and more sinister. The last one didn’t even ask me to practice learning my language. It was just the owl asserting to me that he is God. I know I’ll die soon. I’ve accepted it. Yet I’m still upset that my life has to end because of my inability to learn Spanish.
My most intense orgasm
Story time: My most intense orgasm. Earlier this year, I had my most intense orgasm. I was in the middle of a zoom class when my teacher was teaching her philosophy class. Her webcam is at an angle where I can only see her torso. Her boyfriend was shouting at her to come to the kitchen in an emergency, and she rushed out of her chair. The thing is, when she jumped out, she hit her desk and the webcam's angle changed where we can see the whole body, and when she ran through the door we can see her butt-ass nude. Her pussy lips flopping like a two week old SubWay turkey sandwhich. Her boyfriend played a prank on her (I think) and he called her over just to slap her ass or to finger her or smth, and she left in such a hurry she forgot that she was unmuted. I think the boyfriend fingered her or smth cuz she let out a big scream and "oh my god I'm in class!". She came back in around 2 minutes and by that time I was already about to nut. My camera was angled to only see my face so I thought I was clear. The reality was, that she came back super embarassed to see that her mic and camera were exposing her and also saw my whopping load of cum shoot straight up and land back down on my nose. My crush saved a screenshot and posted it on her story. Now I am on my balcony, looking down. Goodbye everyone, and for anyone who asks, it was worth it.
Why don’t Wentworth girls like my vegetable garden?
I introduced myself to a girl in Beatty cafe the other day. I saw her sitting alone and I walked up to her. It felt like love at first sight.
I said my name and we started talking about our majors and that typical stuff. but I couldn't think of how to keep the conversation going at one point. I pulled out my phone and asked if she wanted to see my vegetable garden from my hometown. She nodded and I started going through pics. I started it a few years ago and was really proud of my basil and tomatoes especially. I think she was really interested and I thought she really liked me and she was pretty too so i asked her "Do you want to date?" and she said "ummm no im sorry." I felt really awkward so I just apologized and said bye.
This has kinda shattered my confidence and I can't stop thinking about it.
Has anyone else had their confidence shattered at wentworth in a similar manner?
Among Us – Mini crewmate sitting
$30 in pennies up my ass
I've been sticking $30 in pennies up my ass for the past 11 years. That's 3,000 pennies a day, 21,000 pennies a week, 1,092,000 pennies a year. To date, that's 12,012,000 pennies. Eight times the population of Nebraska. Those pennies were in my ass! You think you're better than me? Oh, you're not better than me. You handle my ass pennies every day. You pick up my ass pennies for good luck. You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them. You give my ass pennies to your little daughter to buy gumballs with. You handle my ass pennies every day. All of you! You ALL handle my ass pennies! Oh, I'll laugh at you before you can laugh at me. Because your pennies have been in my ass.