that’s an awfully taunt
sailors knot
can you escape it?
prolly not.
try to leave the basement, you’ll get shot
pull out my nine
it goes pop pop
to close the door, i lock the locks
see ya tomorrow
but maybe not
So I was taking my third bath this decade today and I was feeling pretty horny and didn't want to wait to get out the bath, do I decided "well, no one is around so I might as well do a quick one" so yeah I did a quick one and my cum formed like fucking opaque bubbles, that shit was the coolest science experience ever dude they were all floaty and squishy to the touch and I just had a blast playing with them for like 5 seconds then I decided to exit the bath and clean myself off. The cum bubbles don't dissolve. THEY DON'T FUCKING DISSOLVE. So here I am sitting outside my bath waiting for it to drain so I can wipe away my soggy cum bubble remains in hopes that none of my family come to check on me
GrubHub perks give you deals on the food you love. The kind of deals that make you boogie. Get the food you love, with perks from GrubHub! Grub what you love!Grubhub perks give you deals on the food you love, the kind of deals that want to make you boogie
[overweight dad high on acid gyrates hips]
[black woman and hipster man choke on sushi causing them to spasm]
[a karen stabs her salad]
[pregnant woman breaks both of her legs while inhaling milkshake]
[overweight dad returns from acid trip and points at child]
[child does dance]
Get the food you love with perks from
GRUBHUB
Grub what you loveNarrator: Grubhub perks give you deals on the food you love.
The kind of deals that make you boogie.
[music]
Purple guy: *bites borger and dances*
Sushi guys: *appear and eat the sushi*
Sallad girl: *eats salad and stands up*
Milkshake girl: *does the splits and sluprs milkshake*
Everyone: *dances all at once*
camera moves to purple guy and shows him dancing
[music stops]
camera changes to house and kid looks at purple guy
purple guy: points at kid
kid: says huh and blinks
[music starts again]
Kid: *dancing*
Narrator: Get the food you love with perks *doorbell rings* from
Happy people: Grubhub!
Narrator: Grub what you love
end
"hello franklin clinton, my african american friend. may i enter your abode?"
"wornk"
"gasp. my african american friend. Do not hold distane for my for my attractive physique. Perhaps if you groomed yourself more elequently you would not find yourself a bachelor still. Even more so, perhaps the young lady you court would return your correspondance when she tires of the surgeon or magistrate she fancies. Saddle-goose!
"what"
"i will now show my middle finger on my left hand to signal that i would like you to stop talking to me as i walk away from your home in davis."
Look here buddy, don't project your insecurities on me just cause you have a bad haircut. Maybe if you got it fixed girls would actually agree to go on dates with you for a change. Oh, or better yet maybe Tanish will call your dog butt if she ever stops messing with that brain surgeon or lawyer, or swimming pool cleaner, or marine biologist, or chiropractor, or police commissioner, or male stripper, or train conductor, or funeral director, or trailer park supervisor, or subway sandwich artist, or blackjack dealer, or costomer service rep, or gardener or k-pop raido DJ she's messing with. D I N G U S