Stop saying the word cum so much are you fucking retarded? What's so funny about semen? AHAHAHAHA CUM COOM CAM CAM HAHAHA LOOK AT ME. SEXSEXSEXX AAAHHAAHAH!!!!!!SHUT THE FUCK UP MAKE IT STOP. Me (M18) and my gf (F19) were doing the good sexy sex when I decided to browse Reddit and then I see it: CUM!!!!!!! WHYYYYYYY??? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS????? THATS SO FUCKING DISGUSTING AND IMMATURE AND MY GF LEFT ME AFTER SHE READ THAT! THATS SO FUNNY FOR YOU ISN'T IT???? ISNT IT WHAT YOU WANTED??? NOONE RUINS MY SEX SEXY SEX SEX WITH MY FEMALE COMPANION.
Sincerely, FUCK YOU
Weird fact: the Easter Bunny was the source of a significant amount of theological debate during the 1200's, as Catholic philosophers debated why God would create a creature in a constant state of labor (and thus suffering). The Catholic Church ultimately resolved this question by declaring that the Easter Bunny orgasmed every time it laid it an egg (which it was doing constantly). This is now codified in Canon Law (the legal code of the Catholic Church and much of Europe in the pre-modern era) and saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.
Okay, I have a confession to make. I love women. I really love big breasted women. I've had a dream for a truly long time to suckle on a well matured woman's beautiful nipples and taste her supple milk. I want to lick and suck her massive areolas as she holds me close and calls me her little good boy. I want to sip from her natural love mounds until my mouth is full and it begins to spill from the sides of my lips. I want to hear her sing me to sleep as I drink from her holy grail of maternal affection. Basically what I'm trying to say is, I need a mommy to share her mommy milkers.
I want to ride Ouro Kronii's massive clock.
I like Ouro Kronii's design a lot. Her penetrating spears, her binding chains... But my favorite part is definitely her clock. I like it a lot. Last night I even had a dream about it. In it I was jumping up and down on her clock, overcome with pleasure. I could feel its rotation with every inch of my body. This went on for a few hours, but it was so good that I barely noticed the passage of time (probably because she was controlling it).
After I finally succumbed to fatigue, my muscles still twitching from the intense session, Kronii said "You have pleased me well, you may continue, but first I have to do something special." She was gone for a brief moment, and then entered the room again, her clock even more massive than before. "This will surely make you beg your mistress for mercy!" She proudly exclaimed as I prostrated myself before her, still recovering from the first ordeal. Before I was able to get up she approached me from behind and started the clock. It was instantly apparent to me that the clock's visual appearance is merely a facade, as even its shortest arrow was longer then my entire body. At this point half of my body immediately attempted to escape, but the other half held me back, desiring to see what this massive clock and it's long, girthy arrows could do. But my willingness wouldn't have mattered anyway as the middle arrow made its presence known, sending convulsions throughout my entire being, both physical and spiritual. It felt as if I'd experienced an entire century of pure joy and satisfaction. I say 'felt' because I'm certain that Kronii once again manipulated the flow of time to prolong my ecstasy.
I can't pinpoint the exact moment when it ended, because I only came to my senses after she started playfully poking me in my lower back. "Care to comment on the experience?" I heard, after a sound of her sipping on fine wine. I jumped up, completely instinctively, and started praising her and her enormous clock that my body is practically begging for. I explained how I can no longer imagine my life without her showing me the beauty of existence through the medium of her gigantic clock. As I continued mumbling adjectives, making the clock appear bigger with each one, she laughed and said "Very well, I shall present you my biggest arrow!"
Unfortunately the dream abruptly ended at that point. I'm currently looking into lucid dreams to make her clock as huge as possible and to make me last longer. I hope that tonight I'll be able to do just that.
Oh and I guess it would be nice if she had a dick to peg me too.
I WANNA FUCK BAE SO BAD.I WANNA SUCK ON HER LIPS LIKE CUP NOODLES I WANT TO EAT EVERY MEAL OF MY LIFE OFF HER PHAT ASS. I WANNA QUIT MY JOB AND FUCK EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT I WANNA FUCK FUCK FUCK BAE S000000000 BAD. PLEASE GOD. FUCK. I WANNA BLAST ENDLESS BURSTS INTO HER LITTLE RRAT WOMB, AND GLAZE HER LIKE A DONUT WITH MY CUM FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU ucK. I WANNA BOOM BOOM FUCK FUCK HER RRAT BUTT. I WANNA TASTE EVERY INCH OF HER BODY. OH MY GGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDD. PLEASE. I WANNA FUCK BAE. I WANNA FUCK BAE. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. AND I WILL NEVER CUM ANYWHERE ELSE BUT HER RRAT PUSSY. PLEASE PLEASE. OH MY GOD. I'M SO HORNY BUT WHEN I SEE BAE CAN'T STAND IT. I WANNA FUCK
BAE. I WON'T CUM TO ANYTHING BUT BAE HELP ME. FUCK. BAE.
I'M SO HORNY FOR RRAT AAAAAAAASS. OH MY GOD. PLEASE. FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUCK. OH MY FLICKING GOD IMAGINE BEING ROBERU AND FEELING HER PHAT BUTT AND THIGHS BOUNCING AGAINST YOUR PELVIS. I WOULD BE STRINGING CUM. SHOOTING FAT LOADS EVERY TIME I FELT HER AGAINST ME
BOOM BOOM BOOOOOOOM. I WANNA OGEY THE RRAT. I WANNA OGEY THE RRAT.
I've come to make an announcement. Ninomae ina'nis is a bitch-ass motherfucker. She pissed on my fucking wife. That's right, she took her Eldritch horror fucking slimy dick out, and she pissed on my wife, and she said her dick was this big and i said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com - Ninomae Ina'nis, you've got a small dick, its the size of this chickin except way smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. Takes out her sword That's right baby, all spikes, no suction cups, no tentacles, look at that it looks like two balls and a bong. She fucked my wife, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck the Tentacult. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER PHOENIX PIIIIIISSSSS!
Except I'm not gonna piss on the tentacult, I'm gonna go higher, I'm pissing on COOOVEEER!
How do you like that YAGOO?! I PISSED ON COVER YOU IDIOT!
You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrroplllllets hit fucking Cover Corp, Now get out of my fucking sight, before i piss on you too!