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how 2 pick up girls

    how 2 pick up girls

step 1.) wrap arms around base of female

step 2.) lift making sure to use both your knees and back

step 3.) relocate female as needed

    Retire Chokemint

      Retire Chokemint, you only stain your legendary reputation by losing combos in an embarrassing way on ridiculous maps like this. It is better to leave and leave a beautiful memory than to insist and become a shame. It is time to step aside, for honor and good times. You will never reach 1k pp on a legendary map because you think you are the best and you are not, you blindly compete with yourself and your ego does not let you see beyond your nose, your time has passed. Rest in peace.

      New osu copypasta just dropped

      so just fuck democracy right?

        so just fuck democracy right?

This is just ridiculous, why does the council get off so much by banning half of the new pokemon without even consulting the player base? Fucking Espathra doesn't even get a suspect test? Has it not occurred to anyone else that there's a little thing called DARK TYPES?! You can even change your damn type to Dark if you need to. But then when anyone brings up garganacl mfers are like "nah its totally fine you just have to run a specific item on this specific pokemon". But it doesn't even get suspected.

The quick bans are getting excessive. Flutter mane and palafin and iron bundle I understand, houndstone I disagree but whatever, but stuff like annihilape and cyclizar should've been suspected at the very least.

Lastly, tournament play shouldn't be a decider in whether something is tested, let alone quick banned. Only stall loving try-hards care about tournaments over anything else.

        Original post

        Speedrun shitpost

          Speedrun shitpost or bait copypasta

          As being impressive as being really good at folding laundry. Bravo

          Oh wow, another record. How impressive. I mean, who needs to actually enjoy a game when you can just mindlessly sprint through it as quickly as possible, right? Who cares about the intricacies of the plot, the carefully crafted environments, or the subtle nuances of the gameplay? It's all just an obstacle course to be conquered in record time. I'm sure all those years of button-mashing practice will come in handy in the real world, too. Like when you need to quickly hit the "send" button on your job application, or when you're trying to win an argument on one of your speedrun Discords by typing faster than the other person.

And let's not forget about the real accolades you'll receive for your incredible speedrunning skills. I'm sure people will be lining up for miles to watch you run through a game as quickly as possible, ignoring all the artistry and craftsmanship that went into creating it. Move over Mozart and Picasso, there's a new genius in town, and they're real good at hitting buttons fast. And let's not forget the real secret to your amazing speedrunning skills - exploiting glitches. Because why play a game as it was intended when you can just clip through walls, skip entire sections, and completely break the game? It's not like game developers spent countless hours fine-tuning their creations, testing them to make sure they worked as intended. Nope, it's all just a big joke to you, isn't it?

I'm sure you feel really proud of yourself for finding that one obscure glitch that shaves off a few precious seconds from your time. I mean, who cares about playing a game as it was meant to be played when you can just abuse glitches to make yourself look like a hotshot? So congratulations on your amazing speedrun achievement. I'm sure it will go down in history as one of the greatest accomplishments of all time. Or, you know, just be forgotten like the countless other pointless speedruns out there.

So keep hitting those buttons, speedrunner. Keep breaking those games and exploiting those glitches. But just remember - at the end of the day, you're still just a person who's really good at pushing buttons quickly. And in the grand scheme of things, that's about as impressive as being really good at folding laundry. Bravo.

          Don’t expect me to be impressed or even remotely interested

          Well, well, well, look who thinks they're real hot shit with their speedy little fingers and their quick reflexes. Let me tell you something, Mr. Speedrunner, you may have shaved a few seconds off your time, but you've also shaved off any sense of enjoyment or appreciation for this masterpiece of a game. You've reduced it to a mindless race to the finish, ignoring all the careful crafting and attention to detail that went into creating the world you're so callously sprinting through. And for what? A few seconds of fame on some obscure online leaderboard?

I pity you, speedrunner. You've missed out on the true beauty and depth of this game, all in the name of your oh-so-precious speed. So, go ahead, pat yourself on the back for your "accomplishment," but know that you've sacrificed something far more valuable in the process: your soul. Oh, I'm sorry, did I hurt your delicate little speedrunning feelings? Did I hit a nerve? Well, good. Maybe it's time for you to take a good, hard look in the mirror and ask yourself why you're so obsessed with beating games as quickly as possible.

Next time, try taking it slow and actually savoring the experience. Or don't. Honestly, I don't really care. Do whatever you want, I'm just some random asshole on the Internet. But know that your precious speedrun will never be as impressive as a genuine appreciation for the game, and don't expect me to be impressed or even remotely interested in your speedy little achievements.

          Stone Age pussy

            You KNOW that Stone Age pussy would hit fucking DIFFERENT.

First of all, people think of these “cavemen” (not even an accurate term) as savages, when nothing could be further from the truth. They had their own cultures, customs, languages, etc. And they weren’t brainless idiots going “grug ugga ug”, they were much more intelligent than popular culture portrays them as - I mean, these guys are the reason we have a civilisation. Meaning that, as long is you could get over the language barrier (and if you have a time machine to take you back to the Stone Age, then you probably can) you could theoretically develop relationships with them.

Really, they’re not so different from today’s humans, they just look a little different and aren’t as educated. But what they may lack in smarts (but, I repeat, NOT in culture), they make up for in physical ability. To hunt wild beasts, they need to be strong, and only the strongest survive, but not just the strongest, the smartest and fastest get favoured by evolution as well. And even the Stone Age women have to be tough - it’s hard living in primitive conditions. So they’d be pretty fit.

What’s more, there’s none of the troubles of modern life - they don’t worry about rent, or the internet, or anything. They’re pretty much carefree.

And reproduction is pretty high up on a Neolithic human’s priorities, you need to make sure the tribe survives after all, so you bet that they’d be dtf. You might be fucking your distant ancestor, but that just makes it wilder, and it doesn’t count as inbreeding if there’s more than 3 generations of separation.

Now, you may be asking “what about diseases? Surely fucking an early human would be unhygienic?” Well once again, you’re biased by the mainstream media into thinking they were unwashed animals. They knew how to take care of their fucking health and hygiene.

And you know how I said that they were primitive? Well, they’re intelligent enough to adapt, so you could teach your New Stone Age family to live in the future, while still maintaining their culture which made them unique from other people. Hence why a Stone Age chick would be the greatest and craziest fuck of your life. God, I wish I had a Stone Age gf.