GIRL! i know this sound weird but, please. i beg of you, GIVE ME YOUR BOOBS! MY COCK HAVE BEEN STARVING FOR YOUR HOT-BIG BOOTIES! my penis cant handle it longer.... I NEED YOUR BOOBS PICTURE!!!! your nipples.... your breast... it ERECTS MY COCK! IT MAKE MY PENIS LONGER THAN THE EFFIEL TOWER! i could CUM LIKE RAIN IF YOU GIVE ME YOUR BOOBS! i want these bouncy boobs pics to jerk off to... i need it... I NEED IT! I NEED IT!!! I NEED YOUR BOOBS!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
I masterbated for six hours yesterday. I am a complete embarrassment of a human being. I am a disgusting pervert who masturbates to girls that I know IRL. I will not be able to stop this addiction unless I have my penis removed.
I really want a girlfriend, yes that's normal and cheesy I know, but I want a specific type of one. I really want a girlfriend that would lie on top of me and sleep naked and look at me with a shy look on her face. And when sexy time comes. I want insert an unlubed anal plug inside her and I want her to beg me to be gentle, not to be rough, so on so fourth. And after that I want to fuck her roughly and make her scream and squirm saying that I'm too rough, or it hurts, etc. Then what happens next is that I want to her to meow like a cat so when she does that, I would say "Who's a dirty kitten?" and if she doesn't say anything, I would choke her neck with a collar and repeat the same question until se says "I am". I really want a submissive girlfriend aaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I also want her to look at me with puppy eyes if she wants something or to ask something. I want her to wear a cat tail anal plug and cat ears and make her walk around the house wearing those on all fours during Friday's and Saturday's. When she asks me something, I want her to say questions like "Will you fuck me today master meow?" or "I've been a good girl today meow, will you please rub my tits" and stuff like that. I really want a submissive girlfriend that would do all these things as these really turns me on and I would really like a girlfriend that acts like a kitten aaaaaaaaaaaa.
This is vladimir Putin, President of Russia
Some people kidnapped me and put my duplicate in Russia. I didn't start the war, he did. I escaped and now hiding in your country. Can you send me 3000rs so I can go back to Russia and stop this war. This is real me.
SCP-7003
Object Class: Keter
Special containment procedures: A show titled "Breaking Bad" is to be talked about almost non stop by approximately 3% of the population to keep up the disguise that Dean Norris is a real person who plays the role of "Hank Schrader".
Spinoffs and additional movies or TV shows are to be authorised by Senior Researcher Dr [REDACTED].
Description: SCP-7003 takes the form of an anomalous twitter page under the user "Dean Norris". The posts are seemingly normal however few appear to have a cognitohazardous effect on readers, leading them to immediately rewatch all foundation published material relating to Breaking Bad.
If no content is available, readers will find themselves needing to get to Albuquerque to "warn Hank" however, to warn him of what is currently unknown. Class A amnesics are to be administered to anyone caught showing such effects.
Nowadays it's like 20 people per day saying shit like that. There should be a system that automatically filters them out and sends the appropriate resources to the person in need. If the resources work, great! If they don't, at least no one else has to live with the knowledge that like 20 redditors killed themselves today. Without this ban, there's a chance that someone only stays alive because their post got like 200 upvites and thought "Oh now I am something!" It's depressing.
Edit: thanks guys got my first Reddit care message
