In this post I will lay out why Fauna is factually and objectively the most fuckable HoloEN member from both Myth and Council.
1: Myth -
- Calli: She probably has an ice cold vaginer and also she makes bad music she would probably try to
rap at me instead of moaning
- Kiara: She probably has a penis burningly hot vaginer and is wants to fuck Calli also she is probably
sweaty and oily from working at a KFC all day
- Gura: She looks 3 years old and probably smells like a fish market
- Ame: A very worthy candidate, but she likes animals so much that she fucks a shark on a daily basis.
Very cringe
- Ina: is she even a girl i mean look at her che
2: Council -
- Kronii: She would probably just look in the mirror at herself fucking me and flex and talk about her abs the whole time, and also her girlfriend
- Mumei: Would probably kill me if i tried to interact sexually with her or her girlfriend or her
girlfriend's girlfriend who is just kronii's reflection
- Sana and Bae: Austrian
- IRyS: In love with an Austrian (unacceptable)
in conclusion, uuuuu
My penis is so large I just cannot lug it around any longer. It is so insanely huge and has caused so many problems in my life. I cannot go to airports as they think I am sneaking something in. so everytime I go, I get groped as they try to take my penis off thinking its a bomb. I cannot pleasure women as they are so horrified at the sight of my cock, that they immediately run away. My mother and father disowned me after seeing the length of my shaft. Not only is it extraordinarily long, it is just too thick. I cannot sexually relieve myself as my hands are just too small to masturbate.
My humongous cock has ruined my life. I resent God for cursing me with this large chunk of meat that just drags across the ground. Doctors tell my I will never be able to get a penis reduction as they would have nowhere to put the penis. It would just take up far too much room.
I had a girlfriend when I was a young lad, she loved me for who I was and did not care for this deformity, but one day... I took off my jeans and my penis flung out, smacking her and flinging her out the window. She died 2 hours later in the hospital. She was the only woman who ever loved me. My penis is just... too ginormous. It has caused problems for myself and the people around me. For this reason, I will be ending it all. My penis has taken over my life... but it cannot take over a life that does not exist.
I met this girl in college and we really bonded over our shared love of roblox, so i asked her to become my girlfriend. She said yes . let's fucking gooo!! So anyway, after some time passed i really longed for some sexual intimate contact with her, but because of her strict christian parents, such a deed was not in my ability to conduct... However, one day my girlfriend came up with a brilliant plan for me to sneak up into her house at 2am next morning. Ok bet! So you better believe it that i had no hesitance or constrictions holding me back from getting my ass into sweet, sweet virginity loss territory!!
I packed a couple of extra items like condoms, a pacifier( for the baby ) and pleasuring devices, as who could possibly know what type of whacky goofy things my girlfriend is really into, lol
I also brought some heavy duty rope i could put to use to scaling her 2 floor edifice. Also because i could reuse it for some silly BDSM 😆.
Time came and i was following suit in coming, (lmao sick wordplay😝) As i made my way to her household and began climbing to her bedroom. The lust emitted in the air, the pre-discharge alreafy culminating in my pants. It seemed as though my horniness got the better of me as i accidentally tripped and scraped part of my arm against the rough wall of her house. But i could not stop. My sex hormones were violently abd rapidly coursing through me and i knew i needed to be up there. I eventually got up, but not without my losses. But it was worth it, alright. Her naked body and her face burried into her pillow, bunda face up🤤. Gives me chills revisiting that memory. And oh her back, a smooth supple back. I always remember her for her small streamlined back and always dreamt of what it looked like under all that fabric. Finally i can see it's true grace.
Suddenly, a violent yet calculated and choreographed manner of going about this virginity- losing exercise came over me and i undressed myself and put her into different positions. The helicopter, the black widow and captain america, the softboiled egg and finally, as our soft breaths finally meet in symphony and synchronised, i felt we both climax as our sexual legiances peak. It was the best 7 minutes of my life.
I laid in bed next to her, but i couldnt help but realise i didnt see her face move at all. I turned her and carress her face to see just a shred of her beautiful face.
Thats when shock overcame the perspiration, horniness and that post-sex rotten egg aroma in the room. Holy shit. Turns out i actually was having intercourse with her dyslexic and disabled younger sister who had trouble in even putting her clothes on. " papa...is that you?"
She quietly whimpered. It was like murdering a helpless defenseless dog. I could not put it down. Knowing that my dna could surface in this crime scene due to me stupidly ripping apart my arm earlier, i sacrificed myself to relief this curse i misplaced on my girlfriend's family. Im sorry mom, im sorry dad, and im sorry GF. Maybe in a different universe, things turned out better. I jumped off the window but forgot it was only 2 storeys high and i didnt even die. I was taken into the hospital and i am unknown of the happenings and whereabouts regarding both our families and lay in this hospital bed awaiting the charges if the crimes i committed.
I take AP geometry second period even though I nearly flunked last year. I'm currently a sophomore in high school.... nobody knows about this, except for my best friend Anuar. He sits next to me and every time I get the wrong answer, I feel a rush of lust course through my body. Anuar first noticed it when I got the answer wrong on fifth day of class. I still remember it like it was yesterday.....
Summer break is just around the corner and still have this feeling for my teacher. Anuar says that I should try and talk to him, but I can't muster the courage. The way he scolds & humiliates me in front of the whole class is exhilarating. There's something, so weird yet so good about having someone punish you for your mistakes.
I guess you could say I've been a "goodie-two-shoes" my whole life.... so something about this change of pace effects me. I haven't told my family about this, nor do I plan on it. My family has talked about hiring a tutor for me, after seeing my performance decline. Secretly, I know how to do all the problems, and that's why I'm barely passing.
Next year, I will be a junior and most likely have a new teacher for math, and I'm not sure how I'll adapt to this. In hopes of preparing myself for this, I've enrolled myself in summer school to test the waters.
Anyone have advice that's had a similar problem?
Oh for the love of God. Enough with the MORBIUS. What’s even the joke???? “Hahahaha hey guys the movie sucks but I pretend it’s good”???? THATS NOT EVEN A FUCKING JOKE. Holy shit my dick is going to fall out of its foreskin if I have to hear, “hehe it’s morbin time” ONE MORE TIME. Not only is it NOT funny, IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE SENSE. THE POWER RANGERS HAVENT BEEN RELEVANT IN DECADES. MORBIUS SUCKS THE MOVIE IS COMPLETE TRASH AND IM ASHAMED TO HAVE SPENT MONEY ON IT. You know…. I never would have seen the movie without all of these “memes”(unfunny shitposts). I would have been a MUCH HAPPIER PERSON. So fuck your “MORBIUS” your “mighty morbin more morbs morbidly MORBIUS BULLSHIT” NO ONE CARES, YOU ARENT FUNNY. Does not a singular human being have any independent thought anymore???? “Morb morb morb morb” you’re like a BUNCH OF SEAGULLS. SEA GULLS. What the FUCK does “morbin” even mean????? ITS NOT A WORD. ITS JUST GOBBLE GOOP. I feel like I am the last truly sentient human being on earth. IM BEING DRIVEN TO THE BRINK OF INSANITY. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. TAKE YOUR MORBIUS BULLSHIT, SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS, AND GO OUTSIDE. Maybe if you went outside you could get “morb” bitches on your dick??!!! YOU LIKE THAT, YOU SEE WHAT YOUVE REDUCED ME INTO. I am a shell of a man and all of you collectively are to blame.
This meme has spread like a debilitating illness AND I CANT GET AWAY FROM IT. THE FALL OF WESTERN SOCIETY IS HERE AND THIS COMPLETE UNFUNNY DRIBBLE OF A MEME IS PART OF THE PROBLEM. WHAT THE FUCK DOES “gETtiNg MoRBed” EVEN MEAN. it makes ZERO SENSE. ITS JUST GIBBERISH. FUCKING GIBB ER ISH. ITS NOT FUNNY. Saying “morb” LIKE ITS ITS OWN PUNCHLINE IS NOT COMEDY. IT IS COMEDIC AND CULTURAL DEGRADATION. Are we really so stunted as a generation that even the mention of any word that starts with m-o-r-b is FUNNY??? IN WHAT FUCKING UNIVERSE. Is it funny because it isn’t funny because praising something bad is now good??????? HOW MANY LAYERS OF IRONY DO WE NEED. HOW FAR DOES THE RABBIT HOLE GO. This website has stripped me of EVERY LAST BRAINCELL. GOING ON REDDIT FEELS LIKE IM GETTING A SUPER HERO INDUCED LOBOTOMY. I hate MORBIUS. I HATE IT. I know I’m just going to get FLOODED WITH “get morbed, this guy got morbed, what morb does to a man” HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHQHQHAHAHAHAHAHWHHSHWBSQIISHWINSIQKSBDD SSSSOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNNNNNNNYYYYYYY AGAGAGGAGHHHHHHHHH
It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to- penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out. If I don't update this again please send help.
Update: Just escaped from the pentagon, the government is sending all their military forces to pursue me, my life is currently in extreme peril. They attempted to strip my ability to suck my own penis but I created a shockwave to blast away the researchers before they could touch me. This is bad, I have exhausted all my chromosomes and now I have to hide and replenish my energy while the patrol helicopters fly over me.
