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My mother found out I call my girlfriend mommy

    So for full context I'm a man in my late 20's, my girlfriend is in her early 30's and my mom is in her late 50's. My girlfriend and I engage in "mommydom" where she's dominant in and outside of the bedroom. She also likes it when I call her mommy during sex and just as a term of endearment. This has nothing to do with my actual mother and I don't have any sexual desires towards her. My girlfriend and I have been together for two years and engage in a lot of BDSM activities with the "mommydom" play and I'm always submissive. It's my kink and what gets me off. I can't explain it.

Well as for how my mother found out it's really my own fault. I have my girlfriend as "Mommy" in my phone and my mom as "mom" and my girlfriend gets off when I send her pictures at work. She made me wear a chastity cage for a week (a cage over my penis to deny it any stimulation, keep it from becoming erect and it has a locking mechanism so I can't take it off) and I accidentally replied to mom instead of mommy via text message with a picture of my penis in the cage with the text message of "I'm trying to be a good boy mommy but the cage is so tight. It's coming off tomorrow right?" I sent a picture of my penis in a chastity cage to my actual mother.

Obviously she responds with "What the fuck!?" Then immediately starts laying into me via text. I explained at surface level what our relationship is and said it was "Gross" and that she was ashamed. She got into a text argument with my girlfriend as well. I talked to her and she eventually calmed down and said she reacted poorly and apologized but she just begged me not to ever hear anything about it again. My girlfriend was still angry about names she called her though. But my mom invited us to dinner. My girlfriend was wearing her coat since it was cold and during dinner my girlfriend took off her coat and she was wearing a very low cut shirt that says "Your son calls me mommy too." The moment she took it off my mom yells "Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME!?" Then they started fighting.

We ended up leaving early while my face was incredibly red during the whole drive back. I'm trying to get them to reconcile and my girlfriend agrees that was petty and apologized for her behavior but my mom is still angry with both of us now and I don't know what to do.

    Shadow Wizard Money Gang, we love casting spells

      Meme context
      SHADOW WIZARD MONEY GANG, WE LOVE CASTING SPELLS 🗣️🗣️🗣️💯💯💯
      SHADOW WIZARD MONEY GANNG ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️
      SHADOW WIZARD MONEY GANG🗣️🗣️🧙‍♂️🧙‍♂️🧙‍♂️💸🤑🤑🤑
      WE LOVE CASTING SPELLS 💯💯🗣️🗣️🤑🤑🙏🙏🙏
      SHADOW WIZARD MONEY GANG🔥🔥💯💯💯🗣🗣
      WE LOVE CASTING SPELLS🔥🔥🔥
      WIZARDS ON 🔝🔝🧙‍♂️🧙‍♂️🗣️🗣️💸💸💸💸
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      this song is sponsored by, THE SHADOW GOVERNMENT😈😈😈
      WE LOVE CASTING SPELLZZZ 🧙‍♂️🗣️🔥🥶
      SHADOW WIZARD 🧙‍♂️🧙‍♂️🧙‍♂️MONEY GANNG ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️WE LOVE CASTIN' SPELLZ 🗣🫖🔥🔥this song is sponsored by, THE SHADOW GOVERNMENT😈😈😈

      Is 16 and 16.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 an acceptable age gap?

        Context: My(16f) boyfriend(16.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001m) and i started dating around 3 months ago.

We met at this wonderful, cozy cafe that just had this amazing atmosphere and i immediately knew he was the one. Obviously, the first thing I asked him was his age, because, i didn't want to get groomed. It was a huge relief when he told me he was 15.748393837394049838283744929837594027264829837493929474893920753902973 years old, because i also happened to be that exact same age at the time (or so i thought). I was still a bit cautious though.

Fast forward to around 2 weeks ago, it was our birthday. The two of us were just celebrating, when we suddenly got a call from the hospital, informing us that my boyfriend's time of birth had been incorrectly registered as 1 Planck time (about 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) lesser than it actually was, due to a malfunction in the 45 ton quantum clock operating in the hospital at the time. (It's supposed to count seconds based on the orbital period of an electron in an atom of Silicon, but apparently, it was uncalibrated.) This meant he was actually 1 Planck time older than me.

I immediately started freaking out and, in a panic, anticipating i was about to get groomed, pushed my boyfriend down the stairs. Looking back on it, it might have been an overreaction, but it was in the heat of the moment, and i wasn't thinking straight. He ended up breaking his C1, C3, T7 and L3 vertebrae, and has yet to wake up from his coma.

Without him, I've been having a lot more time to think, so i began wondering if a 1 Planck time (0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 years) age gap is too much? Like, i know it's probably fine... but I'm just not comfortable dating someone that much older. I'm honestly thinking about breaking up with him if he ever wakes up from his coma. I just wouldn't be able to live in constant fear of being groomed. What do you guys think??

        OH MY GOD SHUT THE FUCK UP, I DON’T CARE ABOUT THIS MOTHERFUCKING WAFFLE HOUSE.

          GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU FATHERLESS WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT. I OPEN YOUTUBE, WHAT DO I SEE? "DUH WUFFLUH HAUS HAS FOUND ITS NEW HOST" SHUT THE FUCK UP, I'M TIRED OF THIS MEME AND US DEFAULTISM, I'M TIRED OF EVERYONE ACTING LIKE THE WAFFLE HOUSE IS AN UNIVERSALLY COMMON THING, GUESS WHAT? NOT EVERY COUNTRY HAS WAFFLE HOUSES, AND MINE IS ONE OF THE ONES WHO DON'T HAVE A WAFFLE HOUSE. I'M NOT ONLY TIRED OF THIS MEME, BUT MEME CULTURE IN GENERAL, PEOPLE MAKE THE MOST UNFUNNY WORHTLESS ANNOYING AND STUPID MEMES EVER AND USE "IT'S 21TH CENTURY HUMOUR" AS AN EXCUSE FOR THEIR SHITTY SENSE OF HUMOUR. IT STARTED WITH AMOGUS, THEN WENT TO OHIO, WHICH FOR SOME REASON REPLACED FLORIDA IN BEING THE WEIRD US STATE, AND NOW THIS SHIT. I SWEAR ON MY MAMA THAT IF THE NEXT MEME IS A FUCKING SINGLE OUT OF CONTEXT WORD I'M GONNA THROW MY ROUTER OUT OF THE MOTHERFUCKING WINDOW. IF YOU SPREAD THESE MEMES, GO FUCK YOURSELF, I HOPE YOU FALL OUT OF THE LONGEST STAIRCASE YOU CAN FIND YOU WORHTLESS FATHERLESS PIECE OF SHIT

          My goal to masturbate to all 1008 Pokemon

            I know that a lot of people want to catch em' all, but my job is a much bigger challenge. It is my goal to masturbate to all 1008 Pokemon, plain and simple. I usually try to do it twice a day, regardless of the difficulties. At the end, I always win. I go on places like Deviantart, rule 34 and, occasionally e621 in order to achieve this massive goal, and when I finally do, I will become a Pokemon Master. Sometimes, it is easy. I can come in five minutes looking at Gardevoir or Lopunny pornos. Sometimes I come across major challenges that I have to overcome, in the case of Garbodor and Magikarp especially. I have to imagine the wet, sloppy fish mouth sucking on my cock without thinking about the actual fish itself. It is very hard, but the satisfaction you get when you achieve victory is immense. Not only do you get the generally pleasurable feeling from ejaculation, but you also know that you overcame an obstacle few men have dared to try. I have a total of 360 successful ejaculations total, but it only gets harder as I move on. When I see a Serperior, for instance, I have to think to myself "In what way can I imagine this creature in order to get off to it?" It is a puzzle for sure, considering I do not have a thing for (most) of these creatures, making it extremely entertaining and interesting for others to watch. I try to focus in on its somewhat beautiful face, and think about that more than the yards of snake behind it. I sometimes have issues with Pokemon like Machamp, who appear extremely male. But I always find a way. There has been no hurdle too steep for me. I want to be the very best. Anything lower does not cut it. And that is why I am beating off to pictures of Lucario on the Internet, mom.

            Is it normal to be attracted to a color?

              Is it normal to be attracted to a color? I'm potentially bi, asexual, autosexual or straight. I'm also sexually attracted to the color white, whenever I see a young person (aged 15~29, regardless of gender) wearing white clothes and not too ugly I feel slightly aroused, and I sometimes masturbate to myself wearing white. (I'm sexually attracted to myself, in picture, in mirror or in person if I'm wearing white clothes) Also I masturbate to soccer matches, and whenever the white team scores, barely misses or concedes a goal I get quite aroused. I feel NO attraction to white objects like pieces of paper or walls though, but I DO feel a weak attraction to white clothes especially T shirts and shorts even when no one is wearing them. Also, I might become sexually attracted to other people, male or female, if they're wearing other colors of clothes but white is a multiplier that multiplies my attraction to them by anywhere from 2 to 10. Is it a legit sexuality, a part of my sexuality, ir an abnormality?