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My sister found my account through this subreddit. (long live nemlei!)

    Writing this the day after with her permission. Not sure if this is even allowed here but fuck it.
    
    I’ve always been very close with my twin sister. She is one of the greatest things in my life and one of the most Beautiful women I’ve ever seen. We both use Reddit but she is much more private and doesn’t comment nor post. She knew what my Reddit avatar looked like from passing by my computer buy never my username. A month ago she saw me playing Coffin and I told her what it was.
    
    Fast forward to yesterday and I see her playing the game as I’m heading to somehwere. When I comeback and sit on our couch she comes to me and tells me that she joined the subreddit since she loved the game and asks me to meet her on our balcony, which is basically the only private space in our apartment. It was dark out and we were on the fourth floor. Whrn the balcony door closes, she tells me that she saw the shit I say online, specifically in this sub and that she’s always found me attractive but never wanted to say anything since she thought it would be weird. We then proceded to have quiet, but very good sex outside, and afterwards she says she loves me.
    
    So, from the bottom of me and my beautiful sisters heart, thank you all for providing such a unhinged place for me to speak in, and giving my sister the oppportunity to find out about me. God bless you all!

    are you Nah I’d Win because-

      Prove that Lobotomy Kaisen is real
      Are you the nah id win because you're the strongest or are you the stand proud because you're the with this treasure I summon? Always bet on hakari
      Are you strong because you Nah, I'd win, or did you leave it all behind and stand proud because with this treasure I summon always bet on Hakari. I'M YOU
      Are you the exception because you stand proud or do you stand proud because you are the exception?
      Is Jujutsu folk because they're Nah I'd Win? Or is Folk Jujutsu because With this treasure I summon JoGoat, who always bets on Hakari and with his Domain Expansion he says "I'm You" while bringing out 120% of their potential?
      are you strong because that’s how losers think or did you leave it all behind because you always bet on hakari and his overwhelming intensity
      Your honor, are you strong because your nah id win or do you always bet on hakari throughout heaven and earth with this treasure I summon the one who left it all behind.
      Are you Stand proud, You're Strong because your Nah I'd Win, or are you Nah I'd Win because you're Stand Proud, You're Strong?
      im left im right are you strong nah id win stand proud always bet on the volume to the honoured one who left it all behind
      Nah I’d with this treasure i summon or are you always bet on hakari because I alone am strong because.
      are you nah id win or are you id win nah because malevolent shrine or infinite void nah id win stand proud because honored one or mahoraga
      are you thoughout heaven and earth I alone am the kagurabachi because your nah I'd win or are you nah I'd win because your stand proud you are strong
      Are you the strongest because you’re Nah, I’d win or are you Nah, I” win because you’re the strongest
      those who inherited the curse of always betting on hakari the one who couldnt fully say nah id win they would all bear witness to the bare flesh...
      
      of stand proud sukuna, with this treasure i summon im you are you stand proud or are you nah id win because ur the strongest king of curses
      then he shrugged back in fear, "stand proud nah I'd win because you left it all behind, you're in his overwhelming intensity"
      After stand proud opened up his domain he said, are you, you are strong because you are I am you or are you the one who left it all behind and his ove
      After Stand Proud opened up his domain he said are you you are strong, because you are I'm you? Or are you the one who left it all behind and his overwhelming intensity! because... with this treasure I summon...?
      
      The fingered simply answered... Nah, I'd win.
      Are you strong because your nah i'd win or did you leave it all behind and stand proud because with this treasure I summon always bet on hakari?
      Are you AHH because you're A? Or HH because you're HHA?
      Are you the win because you’d nah? Or stand proud because this treasure is how farmers think? Perchance.
      "Are we friends because we get no bitches or do we get no bitches because we're friends?"
      Are you the one who left it all behind because I’m you or are you 4 minutes and 11 seconds of throughout the farmers and the crops I alone am the potentialed one because stand proud you’re fucking monkeys because nah, I’d win
      NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN NAH, I'D WIN.

      Every Jujutsu Kaisen copypasta

      Pearl Harbor Day

        It’s December 7th so Make 🖕 sure 💯 you 👈 don’t 🚫🚫 get 🉐 ‼️SURPRISE 😱 ATTACKED‼️ 💢 by 🍂 his ♿ D🍆 🍼 this 🌊Pearl 🍃 Harbor Day! 😰😰😰 He’s 👀🏃👨 gonna 🗣️ be 👎 the only 😔 thing 🐵 GOING 🏃 DOWN⬇️⬇️ 👈🍑 tonight! 😩🥴 Let’s 👪 see 😳 if he 🚩 can 💦 find 🚪🔍 the 🐚PEARL 🔮 in 😭 your 👉 harbor🚢. Share ♥️ this with 🔟 fellow 👯 women-at-arms 💪 fighting 👍🏾 🔫to defend their 😗 rights 👌 to life👶, 💓 liberty🔔, 🗽 and pursuit of that ➡️ dick🍌. 🍆 If you 👈 get 🙌🏼 5️⃣ 🍆 back, 💪🏼 you’ll 💙 be 🤰 getting 🉐 your 🇺🇸👈😀 fill 💉 of SEA-MEN. If you 🌟 get 🉐 none 🙅🏻‍♀️ back ⬅️👹👹👹👹 0️⃣🚫, 0⃣ sorry 😳 hoe 👌🏼👌 but 🍑😫 your 🌉 U.S.S. Arizona 🚤 is gonna 🛠️➡️👤😢 sink 😵😰💉 😩🙅
        🔥🇺🇸 **HISTORY ALERT!** 🇺🇸🔥
        
        On ☃️ that 🥰😇✨ **SUNNY** ☀️ **Sunday** 📅 **morning** 🗿 of December 7, 😝😎 1941, Messman **Doris Miller** was on 🔛 **🍳 breakfast** 🥣🍞 **duty** aboard the **USS West ⬅ Virginia** in ⛵⛵⚓ **Pearl 🍃 Harbor**, Hawaii! 🍳☕️ Suddenly, 🎆 **BAM!** 💥 Nine **🕤 Japanese 🎴 torpedoes** hit 👊😡 the **🚢 ship**, 🔱 **chaos** 🌋 ensued! 😱
        
        In 👉 the **middle** 🤬 of the **madness**, **Miller**, a **Black ⬛ man** 👨‍🎓 assigned to **serve** 💁 **white 🏻💼 officers**, **stepped up** 🚘 **BIG 🔥 time!** 👰 🙌 **He 🥵 helped move 🔛 the ship's wounded captain**, 🧑‍✈️ **fired 🔥 an anti-aircraft gun** 🔫 **despite** 🙅 **zero** 👰👰 **training**, 🚋 and **rescued injured sailors.** 💪🚢
        
        **That ⬇️ night**, 🌌 the **U.S.** 📈😜 **declared war** 🤬🔫⚔️ **on** 🔛🔛🔛🔛🔛🔛 **Japan,** 🇯🇵 **kicking** 👞 **off** 📴 **a crazy** 🤪 **global** 🌎 **showdown!** **Japan,** 🗾 **Italy,** 🇮🇹 **and Germany** 🍺 **formed a "steel pact"** (whatever 😈 **that** 💕 **is)** **against** 🚫 **the** **U.S.** 🇺🇸 🤨 **Mussolini** **and** **Hitler** **believed** 🙏🙌 **Americans** 🇺🇸 **were** 👇🍑 **corrupted 😥 by** 😈😈 **Jews** **and** **Black ⚫ Americans.** 🇺🇸 😒
        
        **Fast 🏃 forward ⏩ to THOT-O-WEEN,** **Mussolini's** **fascism** 💀💀💀 **ideology** 💯🚫 **is on** 🔛🔼 **the scene.** 🎬 **Forget** 🧠 **socialism,** 🚫 **he's** ✅ **all** 👥👨 **about** 💦 **ruthless leaders, suppressing opposition, 🙅‍♀️ and elevating a dictator. 😈 Hitler joins the party, 🥳 thinking 🤔 fascism 💀💀💀 will 😜⚽ destroy 💥☄️ democracy!** 📈 🎉
        
        **But** 🏾 **guess** 👉👈 **what?** 😉 **Democracy** 📈 **fights** 🎺🤼😡 **back!** 🚮🤚 🇺🇸 **World** 🌎 **War** 😵 **II** 😊👍 **becomes a battle** 👷‍♂️🔪🔫👷‍♀️ **between** 👄 **democracy** 📈 **and** **fascism.** 💀💀💀 **FDR, the man** 👨‍🚀 **in** 👏👏 **charge,** 💲 **hammers home** 👨‍👨‍👦‍👦👪 **that 😳 it's about** 💦 **the survival** 🍖 **of democracy.** 📈 💬
        
        **16** 💩 **million** 💰 **Americans** 🇺🇸 **serve** 💁 **in** 👇🅿️ **the war,** 😱🔫 **embracing democracy's call** 📞 **for 😏👨 equality.** ✊🌈 **African Americans, 🇺🇸 Latinos, Jews, Native 👨🏻 Americans** 🇺🇸 **— all** 🍆🎤 **in** 👤 **the mix!** 🥄 🌍 **Democracy** 🗽🇺🇸🏈 **triumph
        
        s,** **the Allies win,** 🏆🏅 **and it seems** 👀 **like 😄 democracy 📈 will 👏💰 rule 🚷 the world.** 💀💀💀 🏆
        
        **Post-WWII,** **America** ⛵ **aims for** 😏😏😏👅 **a more** 👏💦 **inclusive society.** 👥 **But,** 😳 **uh-oh,** 😐 **some 💵 folks** 👥 **resist equality.** ✊🌈 **Fearmongering leaders chip** 🍟 **away** 🔜💨 **at laws** 🚨 **protecting equality.** ✊🌈 🚫 **Now,** 👩‍🦳 **democracy** 🗽🇺🇸🏈 **faces 😃😍 another 4️⃣ attack by 😺 those 🐥🐥 who 👀 think 💭 some 👆 are better 👍 than 👉 others.** 🏼 😨
        
        **The once-grand Republican** 👯🙏🏻💯 **Party** 🎊 **falls to the right ☝🏽 wing,** 🍗 **led** 👉👌💦 **by 4️⃣ Trump 🍊🧍 and crew.** 🙏🏼💸 **Their** 🍆 **plan?** 📝🤔 **Replace** 😰😞 **civil service,** 🐕‍🦺 **weaponize justice** 👨‍⚖ **and military,** 👨🏼‍✈️ **target** 🎯🎯🎯 **immigrants,** **ban 😤🚫🙅‍♂️ Muslims,** **silence** 😶 **LGBTQ+,** 👩‍👩‍👦 **prosecute journalists,** **end 🔚 abortion,** 👼🏼 **and set** 📺 **up ☝️ an autocracy.** 🤯
        
        🗳️ **Will** 👫🎬 **we** 👉💰 **let 🙆 American 🇺🇸 democracy 📈 crumble?** 🇺🇸 **Doris Miller wouldn't 😩 stand 💨 for 👧🍀 it!** **He** 📷 **fought for 👷 human 👤 equality,** ✊🌈 **even 🌖🌕 though 🥰💖✨ American 🗽 democracy 📈 had 👞 its flaws. He** 👥 **laid 😂 down 👇 his 🐍 life 😀 for 👏🍆 the cause.** 💋 🌟
        
        **Despite 🚫 doomsayers,** **American 🇺🇸🦅 democracy 📈 lives** 👤👈💓 **on.** 📷 **Our** 💰👶 **system** 📷 **gives** 😚 **us 🇺🇸 heroes like 🩸 Doris Miller, and better 🎰 yet, 👇👀 it MAKES 🌽💘 us 👨 heroes like 💖 him.** 👴 💙👊 **Democracy** 📈 **might 📷 face** 🙈 **challenges,** **but 😜 it's up ✨ to us 👬🏻 to defend it.** 🗽✊
        
        **#DemocracyDefenders✊ #DorisMillerSpirit🌈**

        oh we’re in a relationship?? 😻❤️💏you’re my boyfriend??

          oh we’re in a relationship?? 😻❤️💏you’re my boyfriend?? 😻❤️🤨🤔that’s interesting 🤨🤔🧐🤔i don’t see the teddy bear 🧸🎀you won🏆🥳 for me at the state fair🎪🎠🎡 anywhere.. 🔎👀…. oh you HAVEN’T 🚫done that yet 🤡ok ok🤡🤨🤨🤨

          Own a canon for self defense

            Own a canon for self defense, since it’s what the nine divines intended. Four bandits break into my house. “Never should have come here” as I grab my iron helm and hand canon. Blow a skeever sized hole through the first milk drinker, he’s dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second Skooma addict, miss him entirely because it’s smoothbore and nail barbas. I have to resort to the Dwemer canon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with bent Dwemer scrap metal. “Bad time to get lost friend” the scrap metal shreds two outlaws in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel scares off nearby carriages. Draw steel and charge the last terrified snow back. He bleeds out waiting for the Whiterun guards to arrive since enchanted greatsword wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the nine divines intended.

            Karthus Ult

              Phreak stating that you can just type Karthus Ult

              Origin

              The ‘Karthus Ult’ copypasta is a reaction towards Riot’s employee ‘Phreak‘ statement that players can ask Karthus to use his ultimate in chat instead of pinging in game. In the video, Phreak was justifying the pinging changes since players can just type in game. The community reacted by meme-ing Phreak and writing exaggerated messages requesting Karthus to ult.

              Dearest Karthus

              Dearest Karthus, 
              
              I hope this finds you well. We seem to have found ourselves in a dire situation at the bottom lane. Please consider casting your ultimate ability to assist us as I do believe Lee Sin has come to dive our tower. 
              
              Sincerely, Your bottom lane
              Dearest and Most Revered Karthus, Archon of the Sorrowful Chorus and the Undying Specter of the Shadow Isles,As I pen this letter from the tumultuous battlegrounds of Summoner’s Rift, where the clamor of clashing steel and arcane energies fills the air, my heart is laden with both trepidation and hope. The situation we find ourselves in is nothing short of dire, a perilous dance on the razor's edge of victory and defeat. Our adversaries, emboldened by their relentless assault and unyielding in their quest for supremacy, bear down upon us with the ferocity of a tempest.In these desperate moments, my thoughts turn to you, Karthus, the harbinger of death's sweet lullaby, whose mastery over the macabre is sung in hushed tones across all the known realms. Your legendary ultimate ability, the Requiem, is a testament to your command over the ethereal forces of life and death—a cataclysmic power that has the capability to alter the very fabric of our current plight.Thus, with a heart full of solemn respect and a mind burdened by the gravity of our predicament, I implore you to consider the unleashing of your most fearsome and devastating weapon. Let your Requiem soar across the battlefield, a crescendo of doom that seeks to envelop our foes in its unyielding embrace, rendering their advances moot and their strategies null.As your incantation of destruction weaves its way through the ether, let it be the clarion call that heralds our comeback, the turning point in this epic saga that shall be recounted for ages to come. With your intervention, the tide of this battle may yet turn in our favor, snatching victory from the jaws of what seems like an inevitable defeat.I place my trust and faith in your unparalleled abilities, knowing that when you decide to unleash the full might of your spectral power, the very foundations of Summoner's Rift shall tremble, and our enemies shall quail in fear.I await, with bated breath and a hopeful soul, your favorable response to this earnest plea. May your decision be swift, and your aim true, as we stand on the precipice of what could either be our greatest triumph or our most lamentable failure.With the utmost admiration for your mastery over the arcane and the deepest respect for your unchallenged prowess,[Your Summoner’s Name], Faithful Ally and Comrade-in-Arms

              Shakesperean Poem

              Requiem,
              
              In the end, only the dead shall remain; One man, one soul, one will to Defile; A single guide that can stop this Wall of Pain; An alone soul from the Shadow Isle.
              
              Free me from the pleasures of this flesh Cocoon; Guide our feeble souls with your beautiful voice; Lay Waste upon thy enemies on this beautiful moon; Following your song in this rhythmic rejoice.
              
              I ask for forgiveness for all my sins; I ask for a guide to bring me salvation; I ask for thyself when your pilgramage begins; I ask for thyself out of desperation.
              
              I ask for a single wish in my postmortem; I ask for thyself; please bring forth Requiem.
              Requiem,
              
              
              In the end, only the dead shall remain;
              One man, one soul, one will to Defile;
              A single guide that can stop this Wall of Pain;
              An alone soul from the Shadow Isle.
              
              Free me from the pleasures of this flesh Cocoon;
              Guide our feeble souls with your beautiful voice;
              Lay Waste upon thy enemies on this beautiful moon;
              Following your song in this rhythmic rejoice.
              
              I ask for forgiveness for all my sins;
              I ask for a guide to bring me salvation;
              I ask for thyself when your pilgramage begins;
              I ask for thyself out of desperation.
              
              I ask for a single wish in my postmortem;
              I ask for thyself; please bring forth Requiem.