Based on the ‘Own a musket for home defense‘ copypasta but changed to the M2016 from Helldivers. Its part of a series of Helldivers 2 guns that has used this copypasta template.
Own a M2016 constitution rifle for home defence since that what the founding fathers intended
4 devistators break into my high value asset extraction zone. what the devil. I grab the constitution rifle.
Blow a golfball size hole in the first devistator he’s dead on the spot. I grab my pistol and aim it at the second devistator but miss cause I forgot to switch off the crisper and torch the helldiver to my left.
I have to resort to the orbital cannon at the top of low orbit loaded with airburst. “TALLY HO LADS”
The airburst shreds 2 men in the blast. The extra sound and shrapnel blow up the 2 gates at the entrances
Reload crisper and charge the last undemocratic scum.
He dies of fire after waiting for the bot drop to arrive since enhanced combustion is one hell of a buff.
Just as the founding fathers intended.Comment
byu/bi_zZz from discussion
inHelldivers
I own a Constitution for home defense, since that's what the founding Helldivers intended. Four stalkers break into my house. "What the Liberty?" I grab my Helmet bought from the Super Store and Constitution rifle.
Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first bug, it’s dead on the spot. Draw my Senator on the second bug, miss it entirely because running and shooting has sway and nails the neighbors Guard Dog. I have to resort to the Anti Tank Emplacement mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with HEAT shot, "Tally Ho Bugs!" the HEAT shot shreds two bugs in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off FRV alarms.
Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. It bleeds out waiting on the Truth Enforcer and Unity Officers to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding Helldivers intended.