Skip to content

Navy Seals Chess copypasta

    Navy Seals copypasta but chess
    What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the chess.com university prodigy program, and I’ve been involved in numerous minority attacks on the queenside, and I have over 300 confirmed brilliancies. I am trained in karpovian positional play and I’m the top tactician in the entire Russian Olympic Team. Your pawns are nothing to me but just another target. I will exploit your weak color complexes with precision the likes of which has never been seen since Capablanca, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of IMs and GMs and your ICC handle is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your rating. You’re as good as 1100, kid. I can attack anywhere, anytime, and I can checkmate you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with a king and one bishop. Not only am I extensively trained in Chess960, but I have access to the entire opening book of the Botvinnik School and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable rating off the face of the internet, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Your rating is fucking dead, patzer.

    The original Navy Seals copypasta