Originally posted in the Lethal Company subreddit, the copypasta is a variation of the original ‘Own a musket for self defense‘ on 4chan.
Own a shotgun for self defense, since that's what the company intended. Four creatures break into my ship. "What in the Pyrocynical?" as I grab my pajama suit and nutcracker shotgun. Blow a golf ball sized hole in the Bracken, he's dead on the spot. Draw my zap gun on the Forest Keeper, miss him entirely because of the sway and nail the eyeless dog on the other side of the map. I have to resort to the flash-bangs kept in the storage closet, "Tally-ho lads!" the flash-bang barrage creates a miniature sun in the entrance way killing the Forest Keeper and Thumper. The sound and flash setting of facility alarms. Fix shovel and charge the Baboon Hawk. It gets smashed into the floor waiting for its pack to arrive as shovel wounds are impossible to recover from. Just as the company intended.