By u/vigeroy, its the Xiangling copypasta but changed to Wanderer crest in Silksong.
I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Wanderer. I try to play Reaper. My Wanderer deals more damage. I try to play Shaman. My Wanderer deals more damage. I try to play Architect. My Wanderer deals more damage. I want to pogo. The best setup has Wanderer. I want to beat bosses and mobs. Both want Wanderer.
It grabs me by the throat. I kill for it. I parkour for it. I give it Longclaw. It isn't satisfied. I got it the Pinbadge. "I don't need to Needlestrike" It tells me. "Give me more attack speed." It grabs Flea Brew and forces me to throw myself onto enemies. "You just need to sharpen the needle more. I can deal more damage with more pale oil.”
I can't get more pale oil, I don't have enough ingredients. It grabs my rosaries strings. The pinmaster declines. "Guess this is the end." It grabs Cogfly. It says "Cogfly, get them." There is no hint of sadness in its eyes. Nothing but pure, boss-melting dps output. What a cruel world.