Created by u/lawful-chaos, Its a variation of the Xiangling copypasta but changed into the Skif pistol from Stalker 2.
I can’t take it anymore. I’m sick of Skif’s pistol. I try to play UDP. Skif’s pistol deals more damage. I try to play AK-74M. Skif’s pistol deals more damage. I try to play AR416. Skif’s pistol deals more damage. I want to play a double barrel. It’s best paired with Skif’s pistol. I want to play sawed-off, Viper-5. They both want Skif’s pistol.
It grabs me by the throat. I repair it. I buy ammo for it. I give it upgrades. It isn’t satisfied. I find an extended magazine for it. “I don’t need this much bullets in the mag” It tells me. “Give me more targets.” It grabs me and forces me to throw myself at chimeras. “You just need to use me more. I can deal more damage with AP ammo.”
I can’t repair my AK, I don’t have enough coupons. I grab my legendary artefact. It doesn’t sell for enough money. “Guess this is the end.” I grab Skif’s pistol. It says “lawful-chaos, get them.” There is no hint of sadness in my eyes. Nothing but pure violent 9mm bulletstorm. What a cruel world.