Parody of the Xiangling copypasta but changed to Reno from Hearthstone for being the strongest neutral card.
I can't take it anymore. I'm sick of Reno. I try to play Demon Hunter. My board gets cleared by Reno. I try to play Rogue. My board gets cleared by Reno. I try to play Sargeras. The portal gets cleared by Reno. I want to play Druid. The best deck has Reno. I want to play Mage, Warrior. They both use Reno.
He grabs me by the throat. I update my deck. I shove excavate cards in the ETC. He isn't satisfied. "Make your deck highlander" he tells me. "You need the board control in the end game." He removes the second Sleet Skater from my Mage deck. "You just need to have me on turn 9. I can wipe the enemy board."
I lose the ladder game, I can't survive until turn 9 to play him. He sits around in my hand. My hero explodes. "Guess this is the end." He tips his hat at me. "Looking for a standoff? Careful-" There is no hint of sadness in his eyes. Nothing but pure, one-sided board clear. What a cruel world