Hey, voter! This is Team Joe and Kamala reminding you that that sort of thing isn't cool to do. We really hate to do this, but your internet activity has attracted our attention, and not in a good way. We suggest you put down your phone, walk tuah the polls, and VOTE ON THAT THANG, otherwise we may have to put you down for a pre-existing condition and deny you necessary medical coverage, uwu! And please don't make us register you as a Russian agent; if we do, and you're a person of color, we might even have to send you a Native American reservation, to work on uranium mines which absolutely don't exist. So in conclusion, SLAVA UKRAINI, and let's all be good fucking people!
(IMPORTANT NOTICE: this message sent from an FBI location that is on the traditional homeland of one or more Native American peoples. We acknowledge this land was taken as part of an ugly and complicated history of colonial conquest, and uphold the original owners as spiritual keepers in perpetuity).
