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Simp

Copypasta related to simp or simp culture which means a person who goes above and beyond for someone else in hopes of a romantic relationship.

One time I was mid-goon session to this baddie on X and stumbled on a post

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    byu/Blood_of_Lucifer from discussion
    inshitposting
    One time I was mid-goon session to this baddie on X and stumbled on a post where she was like, "Just bought my first house at 21!" and then I had to sit there for a moment and just think about life. Here I am struggling so I can become a civil engineer and this girl who's just a few years older than I gets to sell pics of her butthole and buy a house? And the worst part is, it's people like ME who made it possible. On one hand I'm mad, on the other, I'm no better than the people who gave her that cash. It's very conflicting.
    
    It's a shame that countless hardworking individuals spend years building their lives and hot (not even a requirement btw) girls online can just become millionaires overnight.

    If she ain’t Asian, I ain’t chasin. if she ain’t ABG, she ain’t the one for me.

      If she ain't Asian, I ain't chasin. if she ain't ABG, she ain't the one for me. If she ain't squinting, I ain't sprinting. If she ain't oriental, she ain't in my mental. If it ain't rice, it ain't nice. If my dog ain't in danger, she a stranger. If she ain't yellow, I ain't sayin hello. If she ain't Chinese, I ain't getting on my knees, If she ain't Japanese, She ain't what't happening, If she ain't Korean, then she ain't who I'm seein', If she ain't Filipino, That ain't who Ima see yo, If she ain't Thai, then i'm the wrong guy, If she ain't Sri Lankan, then her door ain't where i'm knocking. If the Ching ain't Chonging, then she ain't belonging. If she ain't Kawaii, I'm going to Hawaii. If her eyes ain't almond, then I ain't callin'. If it ain't K-Pop, I'm telling her "Hey, Stop!" If it ain't BTS, then she may be BS. If I can wear shoes in her house, I'd rather date a mouse. If it ain't noodles, I'm sayin toodles. If she ain't foriegn, then she borin'. If it ain't sushi, it ain't juicy. If it ain't Boba, then I don't wanna know ya. If she ain't playing Valorant, then I won't be tolerant. If it aint Chopsticks, you might as well grab them mopsticks. If she ain't raving, then she ain't who I'm saving. 
      If she ain’t Asian, I ain’t chasin. if she ain’t abg, I aint say’n a thing. If she aint squinting, I aint sprintin. If she aint oriental,she aint in my mental. If it aint rice, it aint nice. if my dog ain’t in danger, she a stranger. If she ain’t yellow, I ain’t sayin hello. If it ain’t noodles, I’m sayin toodles. If she ain’t forgein, she borin. If it ain’t sushi, it ain’t juicy.

      I’ve never wanted to be crushed by anyone more than I want to be crushed by Junker Queen. That perfect, 7-foot giantess stature.

        By u/urgod42069, its the Witch Mercy copypasta but adapted to Junker Queen.

        Guys, I’m shaking. I’m fucking shaking. I’ve never wanted to be crushed by anyone more than I want to be crushed by Junker Queen. That perfect, 7-foot giantess stature. That jaw-dropping six-pack. The muscles of a literal bodybuilding goddess. I want nothing more than to be put in a chokehold by her until my face turns as blue as her mohawk. It honestly fucking hurts knowing I will never be subjugated by her. I’d do anything for an opportunity to be pinned up against a wall by Junker Queen. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can’t is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Blizzard create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fucking can’t anymore. Fuck.

        Just to let everyone know i do not bark. I have never barked in my life.

          Just to let everyone know i do not bark. I have never barked in my life. Everyday I wake up and do meaningful contributions to society. I am a very mature and respectable person. I would never engage in such activities such as barking, meowing, purring or making any animal noises. I am a pure chaste person who would never commit such a si- OMG IS THAT <INSERT CHARACTER> GRRRRR WOOF WOOF BARK BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK SNARL HISSSSS BARK BARK GRRRRRRR BARK BARK BARK foams at mouth WOOF WOOF GRRRRRR BARK BARK 
          just to let everyone know, i do not bark. i have never barked in my entire life. everyday, i wake up and make meaningful contributions to society. i am a very mature and respectable person. i am also a devoted member of the church, and attend afternoon mass every sunday. i would never engage in such activities as barking, meowing, purring, or making any animal noises. i am a pure, chaste person who would never commit such a sin. thank you. 
          Just to let you know, I do not bark. I have never barked in my entire life. Every day, I wake up and make meaningful contributions to society. I am a very mature and respectable person. I would never engage in such activities as barking, meowing, or any animal noises. Thank you. ummm, uhhh, guys I can't hold it in anymore i- WOOF WOOF BARK BARK WOOF HSSSS GRRRR WOOF WOOF BARK GRRRR HSSSS WOOF BARK ARF HSSSSS BARK ARF GRRRR WOOF WOOF BARK GRR SNARL ARF WOOF BARK ARF HSSSSS
          Just to let everyone know, I do not bark. I have never barked in my entire life. Every day, I wake up and make meaningful contributions to society. I am a very mature and respectable person. I am also a devoted member of the church, and attend afternoon mass every Sunday. I would never engage in such activities as barking, meowing, purring, or making any animal noises. I am a pure, chaste person who would never commit such a si– OH MY GOD??!?! BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BLOB BLOB SQUEEK BARK BARK WOOF ARF MEOW WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF MEOW MEOW WOOF WOOF BARK WOOF BARK BARK ABRABRKNFLABRKGBAFKWOOCWOOFWOF*foams mouth* GRRRRR *snarl* BITE BITE MUNCHSJFHJSGRRRRRR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF WOOF GR TNGFMR BARK BARL BARK WOOF OWOOOO HOWL WITH ME OWOOOOOOOOOO BARK BARK GRRR......*sniffs* BARKGGRRR BARK BARK WOOF GGGGRRR GRR BARKNFKFLH FMSMANBARK WOOF WOOF GR TNGFMR BARK BARL BARK BARK WOOF WOOF WOOF GGRRRR BARRKKFNBFB GRR WOMGMHMBOF GRR BARKNFKFLH BARK BARK BARK WOOF GGGGRRR GRR WOMGMHMBOF GRRR BARK BARK WOOF ARF GRRR GXNXHSJSH BRRR BARK BARKGRR ARF BARK WOOF ARF BARK GRR SNARL RUFF WOOF BARK WOOF SNARL GRR ARF ARF WOOF BARK RUFF GRR ARF BARK WOOF ARF BARK GRR SNARL RUFF WOOF BARK WOOF SHART GRR ARF ARF WOOF BARK RUFF GRR ARF BARK WOOF ARF BARK GRR SNARL RUFF WOOF BARK WOOF SNARL GRR ARF ARF WOOF BARK RUFF GRR ARFGRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRERRERRERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRERRERRERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRERRERRERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRERRERERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRERRERRERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRERRERRERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEERRRRRRRBARK BARK WOOF SNARL GRWOEL GRRRRRRRR GRGRG RUFF WOOF WOOF BARK GGRRR GROWL SNARL BARK BARK BARK GRREEAAAA RR RUGH RUFF HRRR WOOf BARK BARK WOOF SNARL GRWOEL GRRRRRRRR GRGRG RUFF WOOF WOOF BARK GGRRR GROWL SNARL BARK BARK BARK GRREEAAAA RR RUGH RUFF WOOFRolling , pulling my hair, slapping myself, barking, dressing up as a maid, acting like a animal, jumping, screaming, kicking my feetbeautiful amazing spectacular showstopping wonderful awesome talented magnificent incredible totally unique never been done before jaw dropping majestic splendid heavenly gorgeous stunning fabulous perfect brilliant never the same excellent extraordinary phenomenal breathtaking BITE BITE MUNCHSJFHJSGRRRRRR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF WOOF GR TNGFMR BARK BARL BARK WOOF OWOOOO HOWL WITH ME OWOOOOOOOOOO BARK BARK GRRR BARKGGRRR BARK BARK WOOF GGGGRRR GRR BARKNFKFLH FMSMANBARK WOOF WOOF GR TNGFMR BARK BARL BARK BARK WOOF WOOF WOOF GGRRRR BARRKKFNBFB GRR WOMGMHMBOF GRR BARKNFKFLH BARK BARK BARK WOOF GGGGRRR GRR WOMGMHMBOF GRRR BARK BARK WOOF ARF GRRR GXNXHSJSH BRRR BARK BARKGRR ARF BARK WOOF ARF BARK GRR SNARL RUFF WOOF BARK WOOF SNARL GRR ARF ARF WOOF BARK RUFF GRR ARF BARK WOOF ARF BARK GRR SNARL RUFF WOOF BARK WOOF SHART GRR ARF ARF WOOF BARK RUFF GRR ARF BARK WOOF ARF BARK GRR SNARL RUFF WOOF BARK WOOF SNARL GRR ARF ARF WOOF BARK RUFF GRR REEWWRRRRRRRBARK BARK WOOF SNARL GRWOEL GRRRRRRRR GRGRG RUFF WOOF WOOF BARK GGRRR GROWL SNARL BARK BARK BARK GRREEAAAA RR RUGH RUFF HRRR WOOf BARK BARK WOOF SNARL GRWOEL GRRRRRRRR GRGRG RUFF WOOF WOOF BARK GGRRR GROWL SNARL BARK BARK BARK GRREEAAAA RR RUGH RUFF WOOFBARK BARK ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW BARK BARK MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW BARK BARK ARF ARF MEOW MEOW MEOW NGH BARK BARK MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW 😍😍😍😍😛😛😛 

          Loving X isn’t a hobby, it’s a full-time job with no benefits, no vacation days, and I have zero intentions of quitting.

            Its a character appreciation pasta often used for anime characters to simp on them.
            You can also build your own “Loving X isn’t a hobby, it’s a full-time job with no benefits” using our copypasta builder at the bottom.

            Loving FURINA isn't a hobby, it's a full-time job with no benefits, no vacation days, and I have zero intentions of quitting. It’s a lifestyle, a daily ritual, a sacred calling. I don’t just wake up and think of FURINA. There hasn’t been a single day where this man hasn’t invaded my thoughts like he owns the place. Honestly, at this point, I should start charging him rent because of how many time he crosses my thoughts each day. He’s the reason I get up in the morning because I need to check if there’s new fanart or lore crumbs to obsess over. FURINA is my motivation, my distraction, and honestly, my therapist at this point. Just remember FURINA is my favourite character, which means that I'm somewhat uncomfortable at the thought of someone liking him more than me. Please remember he's mine, and only mine. Under no circumstances are to touch FURINA without my absolute definite consent first.
            Loving Klein Moretti isn't a hobby, it's a full-time job with no benefits, no vacation days, and I have zero intentions of quitting. It’s a lifestyle, a daily ritual, a sacred calling. I don’t just wake up and think about Klein Moretti, I rise like a story written as bright as the stars. There hasn’t been a single day where this man hasn’t invaded my thoughts tbh.. it’s like he owns the place. Honestly, at this point, I should start charging him rent because of how many times he crossed my thoughts each day, every single minute or even seconds.. He’s the reason I get up in the morning because I need to check if there’s new fanarts, chapters, or lore crumbs to obsess over with full interest. Klein Moretti is my motivation, my distraction, and honestly, my therapist at this point. Just remember Klein Moretti is my favourite character, which means that I'm somewhat uncomfortable at the thought of someone liking him more than me. Please remember he's mine, and only mine. Under no circumstances should ANYONE ever touch my glorious Klein Moretti without my honest, fully complete, approved consent. 
            oh..so Robin is my favorite character.. I'm not really comfortable sharing her with others because she means a lot to me. But it's okay if she’s your favorite character too!!
            Loving Mizuki isn't a hobby, it's a full-time job with no benefits, no vacation days, and I have zero intentions of quitting. It’s a lifestyle, a daily ritual, a sacred calling. I don’t just wake up and think of Mizuki, I rise like a canary summoned by Mizuki herself. There hasn’t been a single day where this girl hasn’t invaded my thoughts like she owns the place. Honestly, at this point, I should start charging her rent because of how many time she crosses my thoughts each day. She’s the reason I get up in the morning because I need to check if there’s new fanart or story crumbs to obsess over. Mizuki is my motivation, my distraction, and honestly, my therapist at this point. Just remember Mizuki is my favourite character
            
            Loving FURINA isn't a hobby, it's a full-time job with no benefits, no vacation days, and I have zero intentions of quitting. It’s a lifestyle, a daily ritual, a sacred calling. I don’t just wake up and think of FURINA. There hasn’t been a single day where this man hasn’t invaded my thoughts like he owns the place. Honestly, at this point, I should start charging him rent because of how many time he crosses my thoughts each day. He’s the reason I get up in the morning because I need to check if there’s new fanart or lore crumbs to obsess over. FURINA is my motivation, my distraction, and honestly, my therapist at this point. Just remember FURINA is my favourite character, which means that I'm somewhat uncomfortable at the thought of someone liking him more than me. Please remember he's mine, and only mine. Under no circumstances are to touch FURINA without my absolute definite consent first.
            

            heyyy queen I saw your tweet about how men are trash

              Its from a deleted Tweet by @goodbeanalt that was a parody of how simps white knight for women online.

              heyyy queen I saw your tweet about how men are trash and I just wanted to let you know that I agree. although I myself am a man, (i know, ugh) i am on your side. “one of the good ones” as some may say. btw I never even noticed how fat your boobies are till now but they’re awesome