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Cursed Thoughts

Cursed thoughts shared in discussions that is ridiculous and absurd in nature that it became a meme. Usually about popular characters and people.


I got banned from r/lgbt for posting this. I don’t know why, it was a legitimate question

    Asking for a friend
    
    Is there a sexuality for people who’re only attracted to 2d anime girls with fat tiddies? Ever since I’ve been a young lad, I’ve been revolted by the sight of real-life women, but Japanese cartoon characters have really done the trick for me. Every Friday night since 2009 I’ve dressed up in traditional Japanese clothing and swung around a sword for hours, honing my katana skills - preparing for the day that I move to Japan and become Hokage. Am I alone? If not, what’s it officially called? I thought “hentaisexual” might work but that sounds kinda retarded to me the more I think about it.

    I want to fuck another animated character from a video game🤐

      Holy fucking🤬shit. I want to bang💥the princess from the legend of Zelda so goddamn🤬 bad. I can't😓stand it anymore. Every time I play the BotW I get a 🥰massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of her online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking🤬sex with🤭her. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers😡and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Zelda’s tight ass🥵. I want her to have my mutant goddess babies😣.
      
      Fuck,🤬my fucking mom caught me with my dick in a picture of Zelda’s😳ass. I cut a hole in my pillow and went to downtown😎plow town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours😬 and I'm worried she's gonna take away my Switch😔. I might not ever get to see Zelda again😣.

      Male Privilege

        Sometimes, when I want to poo, my cock become erect. This causes me to piss everywhere since my cock isn’t in the toilet bowl. When I try to put cock back into the toilet it touches the shit walls and shit water.

        How much whale cum is in the ocean?

          There is an estimated 1.35 billion cubic kilometers of water in the oceans. The average whale ejaculates 1500 liters of cum each load. The average whale breeds once every two years and lives between 40-100 years. Currently there are around 1.3 million whales. A whale on average breeds 13- 43 times in their life. Only 10% of the whales cum makes it into the partner so each time around 1350 liters gets into the ocean. With 1.3 million whales breeding on average 28 times and 1350 liters getting into the ocean that’s 50 billion liters of cum! 0,0038% of the ocean is whale cum, per cubic mete(1000 liters) there is 3 liters of cum. Enjoy your next trip to the beach :)

          Atheism humor

            He-he guys (snicker) hey guys! If you- (begins to chuckle) you’re relig (laughing hard now) religious, (begins to wheeze, as my massive cranium lacks the needed oxygen to think of this joke and to survive) You are LITERALLY IN A CULT (I transform into a being of pure energy, literally ascended by the sheer humour of my comment, as my heavenly being enters the n̵̪̞͙̍́̓͊th dimension you can faintly hear a final wheeze)