So. Lets rule out both the zombie and the zombie pigman due to rotting flesh. Next we throw out the silverfish due to size and also have you seen the fuckers irl? Next, I’m throwing out both spiders because that’s just too many eyes, fangs, legs, and hair. Also the blaze, because while it probably could do some oral stuff, it’s also on fire, which is hazardous.
We started with 13 and are now at 7.
The magma cube is rock on the outside and magma on the inside; from unpleasant to outright dangerous. The skeleton is also bone, which is an unpleasant texture, no matter which end of the fucking you’re on. The ghast does have a fine mouth, but it’s too big. Either you’re getting busted open by that painfully big tongue, or you’re throwing a hotdog down a hallway. The same issue is even more pronounced with the ender dragon, since even that ender cloaca would be unsatisfying.
This leaves us with 3 potential candidates. The creeper, the enderman, and the slime.
There is something I’ve been leaving out until now. The most important thing in any such matter.
CONSENT
Neither the creeper nor the slime has the intellectual capacity to give consent. This means that fucking them, or many of the other hostile mobs here, would be akin to bestiality.
This leaves us with a clear answer.
The smooth, mysterious, tall lanky fellow of everyone’s wet dreams and nightmares. The enderman. Were these tall, sexy people once human? What can that mouth do? So many questions, and all the time in the world…
Ok, it's about sometime someone said it. And of course it's gonna be me. On Jesus' birthday no less. In the name of Santa (Time Allen)'s sacrifice.
The gayest thing a man can do is have sex with a vagina. THINK ABOUT IT. Vaginas are MADE to take dick. They are essentially an evolutionary dick pocket. Do you know how gay that sounds? Literally Charlie Darwin wrote in his journal about how vaginas were evolving to get better at taking dick.
This was in between him writing about dumbass birds, and harassing island lizards and shit. Fucking nerd-ass. However, it is a commercial Christian holiday, so I won't talk anymore about evolution out of respect to the creationists that are totally reading this right now.
I digress, there is NOTHING more gay than being inside a woman's vagina. Made for dicks, AND there may have been dicks in there before. Ummmm, hello? It's basically a CARFAX for dicks. What's more lady-like THEN BEING INSIDE A WOMAN. Think about it, moron. You are next to her eggs and emotions when you are up in there, which is extremely feminine. You could even potentially absorb estrogen through your penis, and that will lower your net worth. Extremely feminine, gay, and also counter-productive.
It is gay to have sex with vaginas.
Now the straightest thing you can do is call up one of your closest bros/business partners. Meet in a location that is isolated, preferably outdoors for reasons soon to be made clear. Strip down naked except for your socks, face each other, and start slapping your cocks together. There is a myth that if the balls touch its gay. This has been disproven by A.S.S. (association of sigma-male scientists).
Actually, your balls slapping together falls under the laws of thermodynamics, and your masculine energy is cycled between your bodies, your balls being the connector.
This increases your masculine hustle, and also forms a stronger bond with your now brother. Do it outdoors to establish dominance in nature. Also, hold eye contact, whoever breaks first is now below in male rank to the other, but there is still mutual respect. I mean, you just got naked in a field and slapped your junk together, you better hope to respect each other.
Socks stay on, it anchors your masculine energy. This is what super straight people do. The gays? Inside vaginas. Don't believe what the liberal media tells you on CNN. Stay away from evolutionary cock-pockets. Embrace the Dong Cycle.
Thanks for dying for our sins, Santa. This one's for you. Seasons greetings!
Yandere Simulator needs a poo- and pee-meter that gradually increase during the day. If they are full, Ayano pees or poops in her pants. To prevent those meters from getting full, the player needs to visit the toilet.
This mechanic will make the game more realistic, because now the player will be forced to visit the toilet from time to time, just like in real life.
Before I get into this, I AM NOT A NECROPHILE!
Alright, with that out of the way, having sex with a dead person is not that bad. Dead people are, well, dead. Their bodies are totally useless. Either donate them to science or donate them to people who will use them. Necrophilia is certainly not good, but it’s better than rape. Giving dead bodies to people to have sex with will stop prostitution, rape, and many other even more heinous acts. Dead bodies can not feel. All we do with them is bury them or burn them. I guess this is a good example of the ends justifying the means.
Roxanne Wolf is so hot. Never in the history of gaming has there been a hotter character. She is more than a robot wolf to me, she is a person. She is a little tease but she's basically my wife. The devs know what they did with that wolf. The aesthetic paired with her demeanor make her such an attractive character. Nothing gets me going better than a punk rock wolf chick. Every inch of her is so hot. Her thighs up to her midriff and her eyes. Every inch of her is perfection incarnate. I would save the game and let her catch me just to feel the intimacy between us. I crave more than lustful fantasies with her, I seek deep romantic involvement. The craftsmanship of her character surpasses everything I expected from this game. Her tone of voice and language choice formats her character. The choice of clothes with short shorts and the crop top which reveal her milky thighs and delectable midriff compliment her punk rock personality more. She is my wife, and nothing dissuades me from this
Roxanne Wolf is so hot😍🥵. 🔥🔥🔥Never in the history of gaming‼️ has there been a hotter character. 🥵🥵🥵She is more than a robot wolf🐺 to me, she is a person.😤😳 She is a little tease but she's basically my wife.👩❤️👨😊 The devs know what they did with that wolf.😏👉 The 💥aesthetic💥 paired with her demeanor make her such an attractive character.👈👈 Nothing gets me going better than a punk rock🤘 wolf🐺 chick🤍❤️🤍. Every inch of her is so hot.🔥🔥🔥 Her 🥵thighs🥵 up to her 👅midriff👅 and her eyes👀. Every inch of her is perfection incarnate😤. I would save the game and let her catch me just to feel the intimacy between us ¯_(ツ)_/¯. I crave more than lustful💦 fantasies with her, I seek deep romantic involvement🤗. The craftsmanship of her character surpasses everything I expected from this 💯game💯. Her tone of voice and language choice formats her character⚡ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ⚡. The choice of clothes😈 with ✨short shorts✨ and the crop top which reveal her 😻milky thighs😻 and delectable midriff🦵🦵 compliment her punk rock personality more. She is my wife👅, and nothing dissuades me from this♪┌|∵|┘♪
You ever wonder why the white man is so much more intelligent than his colored counterparts? One theory is that the early humans that migrated to colder climates, and thus loss the melanin in their skin, had to develop long-term decision making in order to survive the harsh winters where food wasn't readily available. It was this adaptation that led to the signature cunning wit often found in Caucasians. This division of man is still found today, not only in the bountiful jungles of Kenya and the merciless snows of Europe, but in the extraordinary bosoms of modern women and the delicate and beautiful chests of precocious young girls. Men of lesser constitutions often view these girls as unfit, or unripe, not yet ready for reproduction. But the white man knows. He knows that an investment of just a few short years is nothing compared to a relationship that lasts a lifetime. He knows that there is a clear and obvious negative correlation between length of marriage and number of previous sexual partners. And he knows that younger mothers give birth to much healthier children. These reasons sound cold and clinical when written out plainly, but the white man is not so cold, for years of evolution has cultivated this knowledge not in his head, but in his heart; the knowledge is expressed in the form of his love, and the white man has an opulence of love to give. The lesser man looks at a fully developed woman and sees an opportunity for a few minutes of fun. The greatest man looks at a small girl child and sees an opportunity for a lifetime of love and passion.
